The difference between a Democrat, a Republican and a Southern Conservative?

Question

Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be
found by posing the following question:


You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children.
Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the
corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah,
raises the knife, and charges at you.


You are carrying a Glock 45 cal , and you are an expert shot.


You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.


What do you do?

Democrat's Answer:


Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of
his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does
this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this happier,
healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for
few days and try to come to a consensus.



Republican's Answer:
BANG!



Southerner's Answer:


BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! Click..... (Sounds of reloading)


BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips
or Hollow Points?"
Son: "Can I shoot the next one!"
Wife: "You ain't

Wife: "You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!"

Answer 1

And I tell you us southerns are proud of that reputation too...

Answer 2

I think you'd see another difference if you were on death row for a crime that you didn't commit.

Republican: Get the needle.

Southern Conservative: Make sure the sponge on his head is wet.

THEN, would you want a Democrat on your side--who thinks things through and considers human rights?

There's a time and a place for action and thought.

Answer 3

Way too funny!

Hey what about the independents and Reform party?

Answer 4

Hahaha, Thats some good stuff too. Funny and true.

Answer 5

funny i thought the republicans answer would be

quick does he have oil?