My fiance had a daughter with another "man" a few years before we got together. The little girl is 4 now and the "father" is rarely around, if at all. He sees her about once every 3-6 months for a few minutes, he hasn't paid a penny in child support in over a year and in general doesn't comply with anything in the custody orders.
Anway, I have been raising her as my own for the last 15 months, and love her and her mother to death. However, I have a fantastic job offer in California, but the court papers say that the mother must live within Dallas county or an adjacent one. My question is: how do we go about getting this changed, and how difficult is it? I don't know if the "father" will fight it or not, but he may just because he's an *** like that and wants to maintain control over the mother.
Thanks in advance, and please provide sources if at all possible.
2006-09-22 08:18:34 · 8 answers · asked by Kinzel99 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Obviously, I'm hoping the "father" just signs over the rights in leu of paying his massive child support debt and the freedom he evidentally wants. However, I'm not so sure he will as he is a big one for trying to control the mother, even though he has little to no interest in the little girl.
2006-09-22 09:02:10 · update #1
I have the utmost respect and admiration for you. Texas probably uses the Uniform Parenting Code, adopted by most states now. This issue is pretty universal across states. My disclaimer: I think this guy sounds like a sperm-donor, and has no value to the child. He needs to get gone.
First, you need to have a written log of all contact that he has with her. Keep it in a notebook. Use different pens and don't tear pages out. Even though he doesn't comply with the parenting plan, by going along with it, you are creating an informal "agreement." You could be nice or aggressive to take care of this one. To be aggressive, you would bring him in on a contempt action, asking for sanctions: Scare the crap out of him and make him spend money to defend it. You might not get the order finding contempt; it depends on how willful and blatant his actions are. But you will be setting a precedent for letting him know how you now plan on dealing with him. Make sure he knows that he needs to take ALL visitation that he is entitled to, be on time, etc. Otherwise, he gets dragged into court again.
Keep the child support order current. If there are any significant changes (income living arrangements), petition for a re-evaluation. This is your Ace. Keep that order collecting as much as possible; it will be more incentive for him to be bought off (Sorry, but that's what we do when we love our children). If he's willfully not paying child support, have him criminally charged with non-support. Take pictures of his living situation and gather evidence on his extra-curricular activities, showing he has the means to pay and chooses not to. Submit the photos with your criminal complaint. If the Prosecutor won't take your case, file a contempt action on the non-payment of child support in Superior (Family) Court. Basically, keep him as busy and as frustrated as you can, without appearing like it.
Again, I think the guy's a louse. This is playing hard, but not dirty.
The nice way: Offer him some sweet, cushy deal where he gets regular photos, gets to see her at certain times: whatever it takes to get him to sign on the dotted line.
You have to file your relocation petition AFTER you do this other stuff. Of course, I'm assuming that he wouldn't agree to the relocation without "motivating factors."
2006-09-22 09:33:06 · answer #1 · answered by georgia b 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure what the laws in Dallas are, but if the mother can prove her reasoning for the move is in the best interest of the child ie fantastic job, and not to keep the child away from her biological father, then it shouldn't be a problem. You will need to work out another visitation agreement with the father, however, and since this time travel expenses will be involved it may not be so pretty. Have you considered asking the father to terminate his rights at all? I mean, if he literally never sees her and isn't paying support, he may be happy to relinquish the "burden" to you. As far as additional information, you're really going to have to contact the court system that the custody/child support/visitation agreement was drawn up. That will be the quickest way to find the info you seek.
2006-09-22 08:23:34 · answer #2 · answered by Mara 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This may not be much help, but I live in Idaho and have a son with another guy. It said that I wasn't able to leave the state with out consent of the "father".The only way to get around it is to have the "father" sign over his rights. The best way to get his right taken away is that he isn't financially taking care of the child and hasn't had any interaction with the child for a year. When I got married, we took my son's "father" to court and said that we would void half of the child support owed, void the daycare that he owed and we paid the insurance that he owed if he signed over his rights. He did it.
But to find what the laws would be, I would contact a lawyer, they can give free legal advice. If her were a good "father" we would do what is good for that little girl. Good Luck!
2006-09-22 08:28:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the mother and the father of the child has joint custody then she will have to attain permission from him to leave the state or he can say it was kidnapping. Now if she has full custody, you and her can have him sign over his parental rights and you can adopt her and they you will be able to take her out of the state. What I would do is get free legal advice from an attorney so you can know the right way to do things.
2006-09-22 08:32:27 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are already engaged, why not just get married. The courts are not likely to grant her permission to move if you are not already married. Also, if you get married, you can petition the courts to legally adopt her. You may even be able to get the courts to end his parental rights due to the lack of child support and his sporadic visits. Talk to a lawyer.
2006-09-22 08:26:43 · answer #5 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Get a lawyer , your going to court; In court you'll have to prove he never visits, or pays his child support , and in the child & family's future's best interest, you need to move to Californiafor work , & on & on . Your lawyer will know best.
2006-09-22 08:42:36 · answer #6 · answered by inquiring mind 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to contact a lawyer.
http://www.legalhelpinntx.com/law_office/topics/divorce.html
this is a lawyer in your area. Just so you know, most lawyers have a free consultation. Call and ask them. They can give you all the answers you need.
2006-09-22 08:27:10 · answer #7 · answered by sr22racing 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR FAILED MARRAIGE ILLEGITMETE KIDS AND YOUR PITIFUL TEXAS LIFE >..>LMAO
2006-09-22 10:40:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋