Today, on the way to lunch, my hubby drove by the sitters home and our 1 yr old had followed the other kids onto the porch. Mind you that this porch is several feet high. About a little over waist high. She was standing on the edge holding onto a pole. The sitters kids were also outside with no adult? Her & her hubby was both there. She said she was on the potty & he was doing dishes. Now, I don't understand how this happened? She happens to live on a major highway also. So, my hubby glances up, sees her, turns around and comes back, gets our daughter & knocks & screams at the door for the sitter 4 or 5 times. Finally her hubby comes to the door and is like ..."Whats going on" . So, needless to say..I don't know what to do?? I know what I should do, but she is my friend and her hubby is our associate pastor and I kinda feel wrong in doing it....any suggestions? BTW, my hubby thinks she is not taken care of while she is there...she has came home dirty more than once...
2006-09-22 07:39:18 · 32 answers · asked by T&E 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
This is your child. Friend or pastor or anybody for that matter should not come into the equation of whats best for your child. Take your child out of that house immediately. Their safety and well being is more important then anything else. You don't have to be hateful about it. Just tell them you don't feel good about the situation anymore and maybe they have to much on them right now. Tell them you will see them in church. Pray for them, hold no grudge but you can be sure of one thing it is the right thing to do.
2006-09-22 10:10:00 · answer #1 · answered by purrfectsandcastle 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's a tough one. "Coming home dirty" doesn't signify neglect, but what you witnessed did.
What you should do is show up early for a few days, or at unexpected times. See where the kids are, where the sitter is, etc. and what's going on. If you find that they're unattended more than once, let her know you think your daughter would benefit from more one-on-one daycare. That way, it sounds like it's about your daughter needing something special, as opposed to them being bad sitters.
In the end, trust your gut. If anything ever happened you'd have a hard time forgiving yourself!
2006-09-22 08:35:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Small children should be watched AT. ALL. TIMES. I'd bring my son into the bathroom with me when he was small, and I also babysat tiny babies on the side. I would never never never never leave them alone unless they were taking naps. Letting a 1 year old play on a porch with no adult supervision is very irresponsible. I would not care if it was my friend and the associate pastor. That does not make them perfect. Your child's well-being comes first, always. I'd get myself a new babysitter before something terrible happens, like your baby falling off the porch and breaking her little arm (or neck!!)
If the babysitters have issues with you, then it's their problem, not yours. It is your responsibility as an parent to make sure your child is well taken care of when you can't be the one doing the caring. I'd never leave my child with someone who didn't keep an eye on them all the time, and if your child comes home dirty, then, yes, they are not doing a great job taking care of your baby. You don't' watch someones kid and them send them home filthy. That's just not right.
2006-09-22 07:47:55 · answer #3 · answered by drewsilla01 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Find another sitter and report her to the Childcare Coalition & the Department of Children's Services...the last thing you want to happen is for your daughter to get seriously hurt because you did not want to offend your so called friend and your associate pastor!!!
2006-09-22 08:04:05 · answer #4 · answered by Natural_Woman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let the sitter go, and find a new one. She's being irresponsible and neglectful, and what she did is actually against the law (endangerment of a child's welfare). If she decides to let go of your friendship because of it, that's her problem. Your child's safety comes first.
2006-09-22 09:15:59 · answer #5 · answered by living_in_a_bell_jar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you have any reservations whatsoever as to the care of your child, please act upon it! don't wait for something worse to happen! explain to your friend about your concerns of the highway and the leaving of your child unattended EVEN FOR A MOMENT. kids get dirty, that's what they do best. but one year olds don't know the dangers of a highway full of speeding cars, and the many other dangers that could result without constant adult supervision. if it were my child i just couldn't risk it! find more suitable daycare arrangements.
2006-09-22 07:53:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your child's well being is more important than friendship. Find another sitter and explain to your friend why. If she gets upset then oh well. A child never needs to be left alone outside for any reason
2006-09-22 07:41:49 · answer #7 · answered by momie_2bee 5 · 7⤊ 1⤋
Time to start prioritizing instead of being worried about pleasing everyone. Not all the choices we have in life are easy, but they are necessary. You don't owe this person an income. However you owe it to your child to be sure that they receive the best care that they can get.
2006-09-22 09:57:01 · answer #8 · answered by Think.for.your.self 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is not acceptable, your kids are there to be watched and taken care of. If they are not doing their job, find someone else who can. Even though they are your friends, your childs well being is much more important than that.
2006-09-22 08:37:24 · answer #9 · answered by isk8 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find a new sitter. Your kid could have been taken by someone she didn't know, & it seems like they wouldn't have noticed till later. It is always a good idea to do surprise visits, no matter who baby sits for you.
I would not take my kid back there...
2006-09-22 07:44:07 · answer #10 · answered by fairly smart 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋