What is wrong with me??

Question

I had depression since last year and through to arpil 06.
I had to pretend i was ok form that point because my mum and nan thought i was faking it. I had counselling appointments for about 6 months, and i had to stop them because i could deal with my mum and nan.
Now i am feeling really bad and wish i kept going to the appointmetns. I have paranoia, i am feeling really down, hate the way i look, hate everything about myself.
I cant go and see my doctor because he wont put me on medication and i cant have another counselling appointment because i have to pay for them unless my mum knows, which i cant tell her.
Im in a real mess here, i dont know what to do.
If anyone has any advice please help me.

And please dont ramble on about religion. If god was real he would have helped me.

Im 16.
I cant go back tomy doctors unless my mum knows because the counselling appointments cost ALOT

Answer 1

I would suggest you try and see another doctor. Your doctor has no right to refuse to give you medication. I have suffered form depression myself and it was one of the worst experience's of my life. I felt nothing, i was empty nothing held any joy for me. I didn't want to be here, I just wanted to go to sleep and not wake up. It took me a long time to admit that there was something wrong with me.

I got prescribed medication and it helped me, it doesn't work over night that's the only problem. It took me 5-6 weeks before I started to feel a little better and after that ever day I started to get more and more positive until I was like my old self. I was also worried about taking the medication as i had heard people saying not to take it and that it was addictive and all sorts of other things. But I took it and had absolutely no problems while on it or after I stopped taking it, so to me it was worth it.

See a different doctor there is help out there and everyone is entitled to it.If no one will still help you I would go to a different practice or make an official complaint. I know some doctor don't like to prescribe medication for depression, they don't see it as being a real illness. Depression isn't something you can shake yourself out of, people that haven't suffered from it don't understand that it's not that simple.

I just want you to know that you can be helped I'm living proof of that, things can get better and your life can go back to the way it use to be. I really hope this helps and I hope you get the help you need. Take care of yourself. Just remember your NOT alone, depression is more common than you think. Its a fact that 1 in 3 will suffer from depression at some point in their life.

You say you can't go back to the doctor as your mum would have to know. I would try and speak to a councellor at school or do you have a close friend that could possibly talk to. There is also some helplines you could call like The Samaritans.

Here are some links for sites about depression that may also help you and maybe give you some possible solutions.

http://www.depression.com/
http://www.clinical-depression.co.uk/
http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/conditions/depression1.shtml

Answer 2

First of all, 16 qualifies you as an adult for your doctor, so you are not only free to make your own appointments and attend them alone, they are not permitted to disclose to your mum what you have said (Have you heard the term "Doctor-patient confidentiality).

There is good cause that they are not prescribing any medicines, in that anti-depressants can lead to addiction on them, or a dependence. If you get addicted to them, then your even worse off than you were.

You should go back to see your doctor, and explain that you still feel bad, and explain the conditions as you have prescribed. Believe it or not, they know how the body works, they have spent 6 years studying it, and the related princibles.

A councillor is the best person to talk to as they know the workings of the mind, and you can probably find there is government supported Psychologists out there who can talk to you if it comes to it.

Depression is really horrible to deal with, and I think it's even worse on your own. There is no-one you should trust more than your mother. They are there for you, they can support you when you need it, and you want to be as close as possible. I know that teenagers can see it as uncool, or that there parents know nothing, but that is sadly mistaken. Talk to your mum, explain that you really need her support here, and that you don't know who to turn to.

If they say youre faking it, then state you are serious, and that this is a major issue to deal with. If they then still don't want to help you (I am worried at that thought), just go on and speak to your doctor etc, and ignore them. If that happens, there may be another issue here, but thats a different thing.

Keep your chin up. Depression is more common than you think, and lots of people get through it.

Answer 3

Because alot of people think that everything a teenager does is for attention. You speak up about something bad at school..It's for attention... You cry...It's for attention. Such utter bullcrap, eh? Even now, with all the pills for depression, and knowledge of teenage depression specifically, older people will still believe that teenagers have no pressure on them, and therefore can't be utterly upset and downright miserable with life. It can happen to anyone, no matter what age. There's nothing "wrong" with you, other than people not believing you, and the doctors not listening to you and trying different meds. Low self esteem is very common, and is made worse when you don't have a sympathetic ear, let alone one that will listen at all. Find a different doctor, and confront your parents about it... Explain that you have nothing to gain by being an attention seeker, and that your doctor is being biased by just assuming you're faking... Good luck! I had a problem similar to this about a year ago, and I understand...

Answer 4

We all have these problems to some degree, and you sound as if you need to occupy yourself and teach yourself some positive cognitive tricks to feel better about the way you look. Your mum and nan won't be around for ever so don't worry about what they think, although I don't know what the problem is with them knowing. any how, you also sound as if you might be creative, as people with paranoia usually are. Are you artistic at all? If not you should consider taking up some sort of artisitis pursuit or hobby. I hope you can grow to like yourself more. I used to hate the way I looked, and now 20 years on I look at my old photos and realise that I was OK! Think about your future if you can, and remember pick things about yourself that are OK and focus on them.

Answer 5

Does your school have a counsellor? If so, make an appointment to see him/her. Or you may have a youth counselling service in your area, your local library should have a list of local counselling agencies. Many of them are free, so it's worth finding out what is available.

It sounds like your mum and nan don't understand what depression is. If you really can't talk to them, do you have an understanding aunt or other adult relative you could talk to. It is really important you get the right sort of support. If you feel really down, ring the Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90 or visit their website http://www.samaritans.org/

Good luck.

Answer 6

If you are still at school try talking to a teacher or mentor there..my daughter had some similar problems though thankfully she could talk to us about it all and her school were very supportive, organising counselling sessions at the local teen couselling centre which are free. I feel very sad to hear that you have little support from your family and this is probably why you feel so low . Without meaning to be patronising, being a teenager is full of ups and downs and hormones playing havoc with your emotions, its at times like this that you need support. Sending you cyber hugs and wishing you all the best but please please get help, if all else fails try ringing the samaritans, know its corny but they may have releavant info on call in centres for teens in your area and the call is free and condidential. Good luck

Answer 7

You want/need more concrete results than from your first councilor without fees. LouLou's suggestion of the goodsamaritian is a great choice. My group is very small but we would be delighted to help also at no cost. We looked up some foods that would improve your hormon levels and therefore reduce your stress levels. The French do not diet, rarely take meds, & walk everywhere. Diabetes is a dysfunction of hormones so do without sugar & raw honey has 2 hormone steroids that are good and safe. Raw means unheated. East peanut butter but not raw peanuts. Shrimp is a hormone food and you need protiens with fats. Turnups instead of potatoes, as potatoes with katsup. Flax seed oil & vit. B-12 will cost but don't just take vitamin pills. They can be harmful. Cook with virgin olive oil and eat olives. Rice-bran.... These are good safe and neccessary nourishment for your hormonal balances and thyroid which also plays a role in your moods. Aprocots, raw almonds, saukraut, pumpkin seeds, canned tomatoes (as unless you grow them, they haven't been kissed by the sun), watercress and drink 5 glasses a day with a bit of vinagar in it. These will aid acne and your hormones.
In order to introduce these foods to your mom's gro. list you might have to find recipies on the internet that taste good. I already like these foods but I'm not such a good cook. Salted peanuts is also good before bed as they will help you sleep.
You are doing an excellent job of expressing yourself. Write for more help, we've been mentoring for some time.

Answer 8

Greetings Daisy, My favorite cure for depression is horseback riding at a brisk trot. (laugh) in lou of not having a horse the levitators cross their legs yoga style and bounce on a mattress. The bouncing on the peanut excersize ball is not quite right for me. (as I need to land more solidly). Crazy as it sounds, the brain will float up and hit the skull gently enough to cause some reaction that is similar to laughing gas. I practiced it 30 min. at a time/day and it helped for tests and my mood. Maybe that's why cowboys are fairly laid back and happy. This doesn't cost any money. Woman we have to sometimes go to the basics on our own. You may write for more or others. This one is the best.

Answer 9

A couple of natural remedies you can take may help, such as St. Johns Wart and Omega3s. Google these along with depression to see what you can get.

Why don't you try to volunteer to help people who are even less fortunate than you; that may help you see how wonderful (and lucky) you really are.

Finally, medication doesn't fix your problems. You really need try to accept yourself; I know this is hard when the media sends those unobtainable images at us constantly. Stop looking at teen magazines.

Answer 10

i know how u feel , i think u should go and visit ur doc again, and i think u need a little bit of self confidence , look of what u have done and what u want to do in the future , to have high spirit. see what makes u happy and do it.
and daisy GOD DOES EXIST but no one take every thing . so see what u have and others can't and thank god for it and iam sure u will find alot and alot.
good luck.