How do I get it across to my boyfriend that it is difficult to do things around the house due to our infant?

Question

when I do things he'll start to cry don't get me wrong I let him cry a little until its too much and he starts coughing and things. But when our son wakes up and makes noise at night he'll jump up and get him. But I'm not to during the day

Answer 1

Maybe take a day off. Let your boyfriend stay at home with your normal routine of chores and tasks around the house AND your son. And see how capable he is of handling it. I'm sure he'll be of much more help to you by either helping around the house more or taking your son while you can get things done more often once he walks a day in your shoes!

Answer 2

My house was a mess until my son was about six or seven months old. It is very difficult. My husband was often the same way, not understanding why the dishes weren't done, or why the livingroom looked like a tornado had crashed through it. Many people have suggested having him spend the day with the infant while you get a much needed break, if he will that's the best way. Otherwise, just keep reminding him (not in a nagging way, I know with my husband that never works) that you'll get it done when you have time and that having a baby is a lot of work.

Answer 3

You cant.. trust me, I am in your shoes! My husband is the same way. I have a 26 month old and am carrying a 8 pound plus baby (only 5 feet tall) and VERY miserable. My son is enough to tire me out let alone having my new baby come in 4 days (c section). and when he gets home he is always like "why didnt you vaccuum" or "cant you do the dishes?". Then after he realizes how exhauseted I am he will start being nice. He forgets that I had more energy last pregnancy bcause my son was only 7 pounds and I didnt have a toddler to chase so I got more rest. Just go with the flow, he will get over it. I just do what I can and usually its enough to hear him say "oh you picked up, thank you" or " you did the dishes, thank you." or "It looks nice in here". Its the little things you can do to please a man lol. If he is abusive that is another story......GET OUT!!!

Answer 4

I never had any issues with getting things done. I did most things during nap time and after baby went to bed. My husband helped with some things when he got home from work and on weekends too. There is never an excuse for a man not to help because taking care of a family and parenting is a 24 job for BOTH parents. I also would use a baby carrier and do things around the house in the carrier.

Answer 5

Tell him that you want to switch roles. Ask him to be in your shoes for a day and see how much around the house he gets done. Until then, he can't really complain because he doesn't fully understand.

It works too because my fiance was the same way until he started taking over on some days. He said it was a lot of work just to get the dishes done. LOL

Answer 6

Let him take a couple days with the baby during the day and tell him you want him to get housework done to that will make him open his eyes about whats more important and how hard it really is.

Answer 7

Trust your instincts and take care of your baby the way it feels right to you. You have a bond with the baby that the father never wil.

Answer 8

Tell him to get over it. He has no idea how you feel and he never will... That's the way most men are. They simply don't even want to try an understand.

Answer 9

At least you are getting some help. My husband never helped me with our daughter and he is probably not going to help out with our baby I am carrying now.

Answer 10

tell him you can take good care of your child or you can clean house. period.



you should never leave your child under 1 year old to cry. never. it destroys their trust in you and their belief in themselves (one big reason all day care is cruel to all babies.)