My ex gf and I broke up because of her drug addiction and self esteem issues. During our separation she would write me and tell me I was the best thing she ever had and knew she would never find someone like me again and she was missing me. Then after 4 months of separation she called me at 3 am and wanted to come to my house and talk. Well we did talk and she wanted me to give her another chance and that she wouldnt screw things up again. We have been back together now for 6 weeks, remember we broke up on good terms while still in love and thankfully there has been no signs of drugs in her life so far. I am working hard to be supportive in her dealing with her low self esteem as well. Here is my dilema. Since we have gotten back together we havent had sex. We used to all the time, alot. She has always liked alot of sex. What do you think could be going on this time with her and the sex thing?
2006-09-22 06:00:50 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
well,sex is not everything and everything is not about sex,just take it easy and one step at a time....its great to know that you have been very supportive of her,but you have to realise that shes just out of an addiction and will definately undergo some changes biologically and mentally,you have to stand by her and support her instead doubting her desires and demanding something that maybe shes not upto yet....all you can do is just try talking to her about it and get to know whats going on in her mind,maybe shes waiting for you to initiate....just be a little patient with her and give her sometime!!good luck!!
2006-09-22 06:08:49 · answer #1 · answered by country_girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, the drugs could have finally taken its toll. Drugs can lower you sex drive. Or it could be her self esteem. She probably doesnt feel sexy. In her mind (probably) she doesnt want to take the chance and you judge her on what she looks like when naked. You have to work with her. Mabye try with all the lights out. Or start pointing out your imperfections. (c'mon, everybody has them) She probably looks at you as perfect and you dont complain about body issues. You may not have any issues with your body and that can make her more self concience of herself. If all else fail, seek counseling. But dont complain 'cause that could drive her right back to the comfort of drugs. Good luck
2006-09-22 06:18:33 · answer #2 · answered by Ash 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats great that the two of you are doing good now and there's no sign of drugs. Way to go to you for helping her through this, this is really hard to over come for her. She must really care about you to give up her habit. Maybe b/c of the drugs last time she gave her body to you more. She's probally relizing that. So now shes respecting herself more so shes taking it more slow. Do take your time w/ her and if she does'nt come around after awhile try talking to her.
2006-09-22 06:52:23 · answer #3 · answered by tifmears 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm glad she seems drug-free, that is the most important thing. However, I can understand your confusion. I think you and she need to sit down and have a calm, mature and non-confrontational talk about this issue. She is the only one who can give you the real reason. Best of luck.
2006-09-22 06:15:52 · answer #4 · answered by Kelly S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe she thinks that you breaking up with might've had a little to do with sex, if she has low self esteem. you might have to be the one to initiate sex now. don't jump right into it though make sure you have lots of fore-play. since you were broken up you'll have to ease back into the comfortableness again. Good Luck and be patient if you love her.
2006-09-22 06:06:22 · answer #5 · answered by lynne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she means what she says. She wants you to trust her and prove to you that she has changed and sex isn't how she is showing you, cuz if you have sex all the time she will think that it is what she is back for. Sounds like she is gonna wait till the time is right
2006-09-22 06:05:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe it has to do with the self esteem issue, she is self conscious now, and doesnt want to mess things up with you, she might be waiting for you to make the first move. just make sure you make her feel comfortable and loved and everything should be okay
2006-09-22 06:05:28 · answer #7 · answered by SHE HATE ME 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get her to adjust to the situation,(she just left drugs and all) be a good friend to her. You can approach to her like b4, can't you?
2006-09-22 06:08:08 · answer #8 · answered by Lady Luck 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She was on drugs before... perhaps it enabled her to let go of inhibitions which made sex more enjoyable for her. I dunno. Talk to her but not in a condescending way.
2006-09-22 06:14:21 · answer #9 · answered by sneakyfker 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough call.
Whatever you decide don't forget the condoms.
2006-09-22 06:04:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋