Is it offensive to call a female 'Cuddly'?

Question

I was talking with a good female friend of mine and noticed a wafer thin girl walking out of the restaurant. My friend mentioned that she wished she looked like that, and I said "No, you don't want to look like that, you are nice and cuddly". She became very offended at this and said that implied she was fat. I disagree. Thoughts?

P.S. She is definately not fat. Just not anorexic like models these days.

Answer 1

It could be if a person is very sensitive about the look and they wish they were thinner. Many beautiful, fit girls think about themselves as fat and ugly. It's like a sore then. It hurts even if you have pure intentions and meant to complement her.
I wish I was thinner myself and even if I'm by no means fat I would feel an unpleasant pinch in my heart if someone called me "cuddly". I don't think I would show it to you though and probably would forget the whole situation 5 minutes later..

Answer 2

To be completely honest, if said by the wrong person or even the right person at the wrong time, I might take offense to it. If your friend is eyeing up a wafer, thin girl and pining to look like her, your friend is probably not confident with her appearance so ANY comments about her body would probably be misinterpreted.

My husband and I joke that our pets prefer nuzzling with me because I'm all "cuddly and cushy" but if my husband told me he used that term to describe me to a new friend or something I'd probably be horrified.

It's all about timing. Just apologize to the friend and next time say something with less potential for controversy like "Don't say that... your body is far more attractive than hers."

Answer 3

Since she is your good friend, she should have known you meant it nicely, and shouldn't have taken offense at what you meant to be a compliment.
However, I can see what she means - "cuddly" implies a well-stuffed teddy bear, more Winne-the-Pooh than Barbie. She obviously is victim to the perception that average = fat and that underweight = ideal.

Fat is a horribly overused word - it should be reserved for people who are medically obese, and ONLY for them. There are plenty of people who are cuddly, ultra-curvaceous,or big-boned who are very healthy and highly attractive - the term "fat" should NOT be be applied to them, nor to the hordes of perfectly average women who waste their time wanting that underweight "heroin chic" look. (I'm naturally skinny myself, so a lot of people reflect their self-hatred towards me.)

Tell her that you sincerely believe she has an ideal body type, and that you hope she won't, as your good friend, take offense at what you intended as a genuine compliment.

Answer 4

Yes, I'd have to say although you meant well and it is a cute name, most females would probably take offense to that. It's kind of like the saying "Ewe's not fat, Ewe's fluffy" with the two little lambs in the meadow.

Answer 5

Fat is the first word that came to mind when I saw the word cuddly. Sorry.

Answer 6

I think your remark is rather sweet, but a lot of females are so convinced that they have to be all bones and skin that they are oversensitive to any remark that suggests that they're not. I don't think you were being rude, I think today's western society is being rude. It's hurting the self image and the body of loads and loads of women.

Answer 7

Yes

Answer 8

Yeah, everyone these days gets offended easily. I know your heart was in the right place but I probably wouldnt...

Answer 9

It's fine if they are a furry bear.
Sounds like something you would call a heavy person.