We have to pass a test to drive a car. Statistically, more societal damage is caused by bad parenting than bad driving. When are we going to give children the priority that they deserve, and require parenting licenses for people to leave a hospital with a baby? Why not just a simple requirement of a violent-criminal-history clearance and a parenting class completion, and more requirements (home visits, facilitators) as "risk factors" incresase? Insurance companies rate us on statistics and risk factors. Why can't we rate parents on the same, and require that the riskier ones have more stringent requirements to meet? Children are not pets or property. It should not be considered anyone's "right" to care for a child. Adoptions and foster parenting impose MAJOR requirements, so why not natural parenting?
2006-09-22 05:22:08 · 18 answers · asked by georgia b 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Hospitals already employ Social Workers. Just like the nurse walks to yur car to make sure you have a carseat, the hospital SW would verify that you are cleared to take a baby home.
2006-09-22 05:26:50 · update #1
My point is: Why not *change* the law so that you have to "prove" yourself minimally-qualified to care for a child?
2006-09-22 05:28:14 · update #2
Actually, I'm fairly conservative with my politics (except for gay rights and abortion). Saying that it's someone else's problem is irresponsible and defeatist. Bad parenting has become epidemic; look around! Red some of the advice and questions, here alone. Why I care: because I'm raising three children in this mess and it's very very sad. Also, the babies now are going to be caring for us later. If they're suffering neglect, lack of values and character . . . that's kind of a no-brainer.
2006-09-22 05:40:26 · update #3
Georgia b, you are a beautiful person! I love and respect your "about me". I am with you 100%! I answer many parenting question (and ask a few) and cannot believe the advice I read. I can't believe some of the abusive advice that parents offer, and that the asker picks! So many believe in spanking them for everything the child does. The choose punishment over discipline. I've answered a few questions about biting. Many said to "pop them in the mouth," or "bite them back," or "put hot sauce in their mouth." People pick these as the best answers!
Parents consider themselves as experts. These same parents have not read any parenting books, have not taken any parenting classes, and are threatened by the advice of an educator. I have offered some links to some great parenting articles I have found. One was against spanking to a mother who questioned when one should spank their child. The person I provided a link to considers herself an “excellent mother” (She’s 19 and has a 7 month old son). She later posted a link, including the article, and asked why people listen to these “cults” like Freud (she spelled Froids), that they do not have answers and should parent how they feel is best and not listen to professionals.
I am a Montessori preschool/kindergarten teacher. I started out as a preschool teacher with only a few units under my belt. I have since taken tons of child development and parenting classes. I am, by far, a much better teacher today then I was when I first started out. It takes a lot of time to learn the best ways to discipline and raise children. I do not know a lot about raising teens but, you bet, when I have them I'm going to educate myself even more!
It makes no sense to me that people who adopt and foster parents have major requirements before parenting, yet anyone can have children without learning a thing about parenting. The only thing that parents are taught are how to change a diaper and how to breastfeed. Nothing else is expected of them! There needs to be some requirements! It's not fair to our children!
2006-09-23 08:47:14 · answer #1 · answered by marnonyahoo 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Parenting requirements, hmmm, they should start with the parents of the new mother having a baby. I don't believe there is any way that this would work, mainly due to MANY people that shouldn't have kids to begin with. And WE ALL HAVE THE RIGHT TO HAVE CHILDREN!! Only under duress circumstances I would say no, the parents should not be allowed to have children. Such as two people that were married and we know they could not be responsible parents, mentally challenged in a more severe degree, when they were only barely able to take care of themselves. There are many people that have children that have mental issues, more than most of us realize!! There are other things I feel should be controlled, such as getting a drivers license at 15, 16, should not be allowed, drinking laws 21yrs. of age...please, so many teenagers know someone that is going to buy it for them. Many other things, but I will stop there, b/c I don't want to get on my soap box, but this scenario you have proposed is really not how it should be. Good thought tho, to some degree!! =)
~PEACE~
2006-09-22 06:41:17 · answer #2 · answered by no_doubt! 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Because when you put regulations on something like that worse things can happen. How would you controll conception of the whole population? You can't have ovulation police! What about all the unplanned pregnancies? Would you kill the unborn baby? What about all the people that pass the test and still mistreat their children? Much mental illness associated with abusing children occurs after the baby is born and the mother is going through post pardum issues. Adoption is so strict because it is an answer to all the unfit and unplanned pregnancies and has a controlled way to be regulated. A class and a liscense will not prevent a stressed out father from drinking because he is stressed due to his piling bills then going home and hurting his wife and son. Or a mother that took the class and has three kids but decides to only abuse one of her children. There are way too many factors of society to control such a matter. Marriage is supposed to be your liscense to reproduce with society and religion keeping you in check, but that has gone down the crapper due to our social break down of norms and values. People should not have children at all because our world is not a safe place and i am scared to death for my 7month old son
2006-09-22 05:44:50 · answer #3 · answered by micah z 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you have asked a very interesting and intriguing question.
I agree...and disagree. Here's why...
I, myself, got pregnant at the age of 22. Yes, it wasn't planned...and yes it was terrifying....and the father did not want me to keep the baby. That was not even a thought for me. I had made a child, and I was going to be responsible for him. Everything, from the day I found out I was pregnant until this very day, has revolved around making sure that his life on this earth is the happiest & healthiest it can be. Someone like myself has enough to deal with in my day to day life without having to prove to someone that I'm a good mother. Who's to say what's right or wrong for a child? Other than the obvious (abuse...neglect..etc), would we want our government deciding what the 'risk factors" would be?
On the other hand....his father, would be someone who should be "licensed" to breed! He has a minimum of FOUR children that I am aware of. He's also had at least TWO lives aborted. He does not financially nor emotionally support our child. At 28 years old, this man continues to sleep around and make babies....so, yes, I wish there was a way to 'license' people like him.
I honestly don't think that licensing this would work. Free Will is a beautiful gift, but being responsible can be difficult sometimes for people. Even the people who are licensed to drive still drink and get behind the wheel....People with STD's still have unprotected sex....
So, unfortunately, I don't think having a license to breed would improve parenting. Maybe....a license to have sex?? ;-)
Great question.
2006-09-25 15:22:09 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would be great if you could insure that people would at least get the training that getting a license would require, and I completely agree with your intentions.
However, how would this licensing be enforced? Sterilization? Mandatory prison time and/or fines for those who father or deliver children without the proper government approval?
Like it or not, we are where we are, and people do have the "right" to care for their children. They do not, however, have the right to abuse them, and we're not making such great strides in that area of enforcement, are we?
Your only option is to keep focused on the ideas you've expressed, and do the best job you can to prepare yourself and whoever else you can to be the best parents you know how to be.
Even then, there will be those who think you're doing a terrible job, who would "never do it that way with MY children!"
This will probably be your mother-in-law.
2006-09-22 06:08:46 · answer #5 · answered by barbertono 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I agree ,but even with a back ground check it is impossible to know who will or will not be good parents.Some of the best parents are not exactly what you or I would consider parent material ,and those we would sometimes are the worst.So you see that is why we do not do that. Anyways have you ever heard the term wolf in sheeps clothing.apperances are decieving.But I do believe that child protective services should have stiffer guidlines of abuse or neglect .Do u know in Kentucky the if a child recieves one MC Donalds hamburger a day it is considered ok. How many people do you know can survive on that?
2006-09-22 05:34:30 · answer #6 · answered by Alicia S 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I have often thought about this numerous times myself... however, I think we should prevent the bad parenting b4 the pregnancy.... you need a building permit by law to build etc. when you want to start having a family.... you need to apply for a permit of some sorts... background checks, psycho analysis... dont take the baby away and/or give a mother the opportunity to make bad choices during her pregnancy, nip it b4 it begins... eleminate these children from suffering... and punish thier parents if they choose to disobey!
2006-09-22 06:05:00 · answer #7 · answered by Kara K 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Theoretically, this seems like it would make sense, but just think what would happen if tis was carried out in this country.
With our government being run but right wing neocons, I could just imagine who would be deemed suitable parents - conservative christians who are pro-war and never have a dissenting opinion!
There would be no more mixed race babies, and I'm sure if you're muslim our country wouldn't let you breed!
2006-09-23 01:40:11 · answer #8 · answered by Emily O 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never thought about it that way....but how would that work, i mean how would the hospital knw? The 2 - 3 days u spend in there your somewhat doped up and have a serious lack of sleep...so what steps would they take to assure they are right?
2006-09-22 05:25:16 · answer #9 · answered by harmonieclark 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why do it matter so much to you. yes, some people should not be parents, but they do have a right to make that decision. they can take all the parenting classes one may require but that does not mean that they will listen or do as they are supposed to. you take care of your own and help as many as you can and leave everyone else alone. I had to learn for myself. there is nothing much we can do
2006-09-22 05:31:22 · answer #10 · answered by burtonstanley 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋