I am trying to get rid of my ex. I have tried to say goodbye and have a good life. He said do not say goodbye to me. He has given me the ultamatum deal with my life or break up with me. How do I just get him to move on and leave me alone. It is a safety issue. I am scared of him and his anger. I just want to heal and move on. He brings out the worst in me. He makes me feel really depressed. It is hard to explain, but when we have a really bad fight I excallate to the point where I get really depressed.
People may say this is under my control, but I feel that he is bad for me and part of the solution to me being healthy is to have him out of my life.
How do I help him move on and go to some other woman? He wants me still, but has a deep anger for me.
2006-09-22 05:06:18 · 9 answers · asked by adobeprincess 6 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Thanks jointy. I hope you understand. I will take that for what it helps me with. I will think about others in my life. My friends. I did just call him and say goodbye. I hope that works. He did not answer, but I told him I needed peace and he needed a fresh start with someone else. I hope he can listen to that again and again. It is not something I would mind someone else hearing. It is recored, but it does say I am affraid of him. He will not really want others to know that. He prides himself on being a kind man.
2006-09-22 05:15:06 · update #1
While kicking someone in the balls may sound tempting at times for some cases I do not really feel like that. I just want peace. I do not need any revenge. I would not want to go to jail or have an assalt charge anyway. I am not a person who wants revenge anyway. I am pretty peaceful. I just want to be left alone. I just want my wounds to heal.
I would love counselling, but I am inbetween health insurance at the time. I just called and mentioned this to someone and they treated me like I had AIDs or something. I guess this is something that gets discrimination about.
2006-09-22 05:18:38 · update #2
I guess the break up option he gave me was a threat not a real option because when I took him up on it he said no.
2006-09-22 05:20:29 · update #3
At this point it is not bad enough for a rastaining order that would just be antagonistic.
2006-09-22 05:21:11 · update #4
*******Okay I see I am geting no understanding or compassion with this question. I guess no one understands what this means. Perhaps I just did not word it correctly or no one really understands this complex issue.**********
2006-09-22 05:23:05 · update #5
Two words: RESTRAINING ORDER. Talk to the police and tell them how he gets when he is angry. Be sure to tell them that you fear for your life and your safety. Once you have the restraining order in place, do not contact him by any means. If he contacts you, tell him point-blank that you want him OUT of your life and you'll have him arrested if he gets anywhere near you, then hang up the phone. If that doesn't get the hint through his thick skull then maybe spending some time in a prison cell will...
2006-09-22 05:15:26 · answer #1 · answered by sarge927 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You said; I am trying to get rid of my ex.
If he has given you an ultimatum, it sounds to me as if you've already taken it. If you haven't decided yet then I would tell you to just leave him and let him know the fact of your decision.
If he keeps after you he's a stalker and you should tell him that too! Tell him you'll report him as such if he doesn't stop.
You can't "help" him move on to other women and you shouldn't try! How would you feel about yourself knowing you "helped" him move on to another woman and her life turns into a disaster?
Let him go, tell him to go, be nice, be clear, but be firm!
2006-09-22 12:22:46 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you cant help him move on but you can yourself stop calling him don't go around him a restraining order sounds good but at the same time that can upset him more it may just take time therapy is good to but talking to people will do just the same have you told him why you don't want to be with him any more i think its best that you tell him he needs help and he just might take you up on that but any way it happens just stay away don't call and good luck
2006-09-22 12:43:12 · answer #3 · answered by benard 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get into therapy - now. And if you feel that you are in danger do everything necessary to protect yourself - restraining orders, move, change jobs, whatever you need to do to stay safe. Nothing - no job, home, etc. is worth trading your life for. Therapy will also help you to avoid repeating this relationship - believe me - I know.
2006-09-22 12:13:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are the one who has to move on. You have no control over what he thinks or does. Hopefully you can find some control over what you think and do. He has offered you the option of breaking up—why don't you take it?
2006-09-22 12:17:40 · answer #5 · answered by DrB 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Give him a restraining order maybe then he will stop bugging you and if he comes near you, call the police.
2006-09-22 12:15:19 · answer #6 · answered by Guywiththehir 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best way is to stop thinking about him and think abt the others....more u will think more dejection u will get......just get rid of him and dnt listen to his excuses coz they will gonna take u in the dillemma of self destruction.
2006-09-22 12:11:38 · answer #7 · answered by JONTY L 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
kick him in the balls!....
2006-09-22 12:14:37 · answer #8 · answered by gooterscooby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Out of sight out of mind"
~ (",)
2006-09-22 12:15:26 · answer #9 · answered by helpdesk916 ♦♣♠♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋