I'm sixteen, and I'm gay, but I can't tell anyone I know. How can I get help?

Question

I think that I like younger boys, but I can't tell anyone. Please help.

Answer 1

If you are comfortable being gay you don't need 'help', unless you need help accepting your orientation. Homosexuality is not a disease.
However, You may need help if you are pursuing younger boys. You could be in legal trouble if you have sexual relations with a younger boy. You could be arrested for rape if the boy told his parents and they filed charges. It is best if you find boys your age that are experiencing the same feelings. There are websites for boys who are confused.
Please be careful of older predatory men who might attempt to take advantage of a confused 16 year old boy. Please refer to: www.freetobeme.com
Relax, there are many boys out there experiencing the same feelings as you, now you need to find someone who you can confide in that will understand. This site is a great place to start. Please be careful, and don't be ashamed about who you are. You don't need help, you need acceptance.

Answer 2

What do you need help with? There's nothing wrong with being sixteen and being gay. If you've come to the conclusion that you can't tell anyone you know, by not telling anyone, you've solved your problem. The business of your sexuality only involves you and the person/people you want to be with. No one else needs to know. If people would never suspect it of you, be discrete- there's a difference between being discrete and being in the closet. If you're at all feminine, people probably already know, so why hide?

As far as you liking younger boys, the issue I find with that is, if you're attracted because you feel dominate being the older person? You didn't really specify how much younger you like them. Although you're a child yourself, I would say that if you're interested in boys under 14, you should seek psychological counseling. Confidentiality laws protects your secret when dealing with a professional couselor. But, even in hetro relationships, it's better to date people your own age when you're a kid because you're more than likely on the same maturity level. I can't see why that shouldn't apply in a gay relationship. Not to mention, I don't think you want the pressure and guilt of being responsible for 'turning a young kid out' before he's made up his mind about what he wants in his life. A younger kid may not be able to handle being gay like you can at sixteen. And the fact is, the suicide rate among gay teens is somewhat high. It would probably be wiser to date guys your own age or at your experience level.

Answer 3

Don't listen to some of these people in here--the ones calling you "sick" or saying you need help or get over it. They are simply uneducated and narrow-minded. In fact, they are the very type of people that make you have to ask a question like this--if people would simply worry about themselves instead of sticking their noses in other people's personal lives and judging them, being gay wouldn't have the stigma attached to it as it sometimes does. There is nothing wrong with being gay. It is who you are. You should learn to accept yourself and be comfortable with yourself. Once you have reached that point, you will probably be able to handle telling others who may "disapprove." You never know, they may not be as down on you as you think. If there's someone you can trust and you really want to talk about this, tell that person now. As far as your parents go, they're your parents. They should love you no matter what. As far as the younger boys--you're a young boy. It's fine. If that doesn't change as you get older, you may want to explore why this is with a professional. Good luck!

Answer 4

The number of bigits in here, well, its mind boggling. First off, you have nothing to be ashamed of. God made you gay, so he's not going to change you back. It takes all kinds to make our society function. If you want help for the younger boy thing, that's understandable. You are old enough to talk to someone professionally about that, you don't want to still prefer young kids after you are no longer a kid. But you don't need help being gay. Be safe, don't tell your folks right away if you're worried about how they will act. Look online for local meetup groups for gay teens. If you look you will be able to find some people that you can talk to. Good luck kiddo...

Answer 5

There is nothing wrong with being gay. But if you are finding yourself attracted to young boys, then the good thing is that you know it is wrong and are seeking help. It is a very taboo subject in our society, and there would be few safe outlets for venting your desires. You will need to seek discreat psycological help. Inquire into it, but you can use the excuse that you believe you may be depressed, especially if you parents need to get involved. But remember that what is shared in the privacy of a psycholigist or phyciatrists office is only between you and him/her. Do not be afraid to tell them th truth, it is the only way they can help you.

Answer 6

I just wanted to tell you to **** the ignorant bigots on this forum. I'm not gay but I know what dealing with these retards can be like. I think you should try seeing a school counsellor if you like younger boys, as this, in my opinion, is wrong.

Answer 7

Hi. Don't be worried. There are lots of loving resources out there to help you and your loved ones. Look to see if there is a Metropolitan Community Church (MCC) in your area. Talk to the pastor there if you do not have one of your own that you think will understand. The MCC was founded by gay folks and I know they will help you without pressing you to accept any of their religious opinions. You can trust them. Look for "Parents And Friends of Lesbian and Gays" ot "P-FLAG" online. This is a support group for families with gay kids. They are a trustworthy organization that can help. If there is no MCC in your area, look for gay community organizations in other churches (like "Integrity" among Episcopalians or "Dignity" among Roman Catholics). Check out United Church of Christ (UCC) as another gay supportive faith community and the Unitarians. So many religious communities sponsor gay/lesbian support groups that you are sure to find one nearby. Get good advice about being who you are. Seek some counseling if that will help. But above all, be true to yourself and treat yourself carefully and with love.

Answer 8

First off
Nobody can chose how they feel, they can only deny it.
You need to ask yourself these questions.
Do I want to be happy being myself, or do I want to be miserable trying to be something i'm not?
If you don't feel comfortable telling someone you know, then get a myspace account, and meet other people who share your sexuality, and ask them for advice on how to deal with being a homosexual.
And lastly,
if you are ever confident enough to 'come out', then prepare to keep your head up and stand your ground and know there is nothing wrong with the way you are.

Answer 9

Be a good man, with great efforts promise your self that you will not do any thing wrong . You will be very happy when you see your self strong man and many girls love you. If you face any problem go to your doc..

Answer 10

Check out http://www.fhu.com There's some stuff from a spiritual aspect.