my boyfriend is a chain smoker he's only 20 is there any way I can help him quit?

Answer 1

Quitting smoking is something that a person has to do on their own. There is nothing you can do to get him to quit unless he WANTS to.

Answer 2

He has to want to. Encourage, do not nag. Talk about it honestly, and tell him what you think, that you love him anyway, but that you don't want him to get any health problems, and it stinks.

I quit cold turkey, but it took 10 or more tries. Do not 'beat him up' about it, do not let him do it either. But if he is kidding himself at any stage, tell him he is kidding himself.

Patches may work, but you can simply maintain a lesser addiction. I think cold turkey is ok, but it is always hard.

You need to be active and busy, something needs to replace his 'stress relief'. You can trade it for a good habit in this way, but again it is not easy!!!

Good luck. First step is.... does he actually want to quit, or do you want him to quit? The former must be true to have any chance!!

: ) Good luck

EDIT: actually, I just noticed you said chain smoker. Patches may help. I went cold turkey from a 'smoking-in- a-ton-of-joints' addiction, not from a full blown chaining of cigarettes. Maybe if you watered his addiction down it might help, but I would still try cold turkey. Get through 3 weeks and you have a really good chance if you avoid triggers like bars, friends who smoke etc.

Answer 3

Really sorry to hear this. If he wants to quit there are lots of things you can do to help him, but he has to want it. Don't even think of scare tactics. They'll do nothing. There are people in cancer wards that have lost their fingers from bone cancer due to holding the butts, and they smoke with their feet. There are people who've had their larynx removed, and they smoke though the stoma (hole in their throat.) Cigarettes are pure, concentrated evil (the Native Americans' way of thanking us for alcohol.)

It might help if you understood addiction. Addiction is a disease, but one that people kind of have a choice in having. Understand that addiction is a bio-psycho-social phenomenon. This means your boyfriend has a biological need for his cigarette habit (nicotine), a psychological need (maybe smoking alleviates stress) and a social need (his friends smoke, he works in a bar, it's financially affordable, etc.)

Usually, but not always, all three criteria must be met for a person to maintain addiction. In other words, a person may have a physical craving for nicotine, but if they have no money to buy cigarettes, the addiction "goes away." You can take a normal, happy, healthy person, forcibly addict them to heroin, take them off the drug and 99% of the time, they will kick the addiction as soon as they have passed the withdrawal stage. If the tendency for addiction wasn't there to begin with, it's generally not something people "pick up." Conversely, if a person has the tendency towards addiction, it can be VERY HARD to get them to break it. The recidivism rate for addicts is something like 98%.

Your boyfriends only hope is to examine his addiction, identify the bio-psycho-social factors, and then replace them with healthy substitutes. Many people who smoke can stop, but they replace the nicotine with food, and gain weight. So the solution is to add in exercise with the food. If stress is a factor, they need to find another way to deal besides lighting up. Meditation, working out, counseling, etc. If a person works around smokers everyday, they are going to have a very hard time quitting unless they consider changing jobs. Same thing applies if all their friends smoke. Do you get the idea?

Number one though is he has to want to quit. If he does, have him read this email and see if he feels up to the challenge. It won't be easy, but neither is having lung cancer or emphysema.

Answer 4

Ultimately, it has to be his decision.

In the meantime, you could visit a nursing home and "volunteer" with some of the residents there. You'll see LOTS of good examples of people who have breathing problems from being smokers. Your lungs get pretty nasty there towards the end of your life if you've smoked for a while.

Also, 2nd hand smoke is almost just as bad for you. Make sure you want to bear the consequences to your own health of being with him before you make any lifetime commitments.

Good luck with this.

Answer 5

no, he's pretty much screwed! I was a smoker for 15 years and finally quit, after several failed attempts. How do I do it you ask? I refuse to be a slave to them. I just don't buy them. Sure I want to, but I don't. Self control and if he has none, there isn't a damn thing you can do.
You can give him a test to do though....you know those little coffee straws? Very tiny right? He has to put that in his mouth and breath only through that......and that is what emphysema feels like.

Answer 6

For him to quit successfully, he has to want to quit for himself, not for someone else. Feel free to tell him your opinion of his smoking and how you feel about it, but don't try to pressure him in to quitting. When/if he's ready, give him all the support that he needs, patches, losenges, if he needs to talk about it to someone, there are quit call lines that he can contact that can talk him through it. It takes 48 hours for the effects of a ciggarette to be out of our systems, but most smokers have an emotion that they would turn to a smoke for, once it's out of his system, when he gets these emotions that trigger his current smoking, he's going to want to have one. He will need all your support during that time.

Answer 7

Yes, every time he lights up, you grab one too and start smoking one with him.

You'll look like a dumbass and be coughing all over the place. He'll laugh but won't like it at the same time. He might realize how stupid it is and quit.

Answer 8

well only motivation can work, this may sound ridiculous but offer him this motivation, they say that by force not even the shoes fit, but they also say it pulls harder a set of **** than a set of oxes so tell him just that no more sex, relation ship unless he quits, if he says bye then you are better without him if he say yes help him for he now have the will.

Answer 9

Not unless he wants to quit!

Answer 10

help him by telling him how you fell about him smoking..Keep talking to him about it and telling him it's bad to smoke.If he says he can't stop tell him to bite an apple or suck a sweet if he still has the urge to smoke..that might help.. (: