I JUST WANT TO KNOW! Why is it when you meet someone, it seems that everyone has so much to say?

Question

I meet many people every day and everyone I meet or talk to are just too busy talking about themselves, I mean, I try to be a good listener as I feel that is important but come on people, it isn't all about you so quit ****** talking and do some listening when you meet others, ask someone how they are and sincerely mean it, ok.

It bothered me today.

Answer 1

You've made a very good point. If more people were good listeners we might be able to have less wars, more understanding of others culture, and more awareness of whats going on with our children and neighbors. Let's all call our congressmen and and request a new holiday. TAKE A MOMENT TO LISTEN DAY. We have a holiday for everything else. Why not?

Answer 2

Here's some information from Psychology. We are programmed to think of ourselves first. We know the most about ourselves, so it's easier to talk about what we know!

"According to Freud, we are born with our Id. The id is an important part of our personality because as newborns, it allows us to get our basic needs met. Freud believed that the id is based on our pleasure principle. In other words, the id wants whatever feels good at the time, with no consideration for the reality of the situation. When a child is hungry, the id wants food, and therefore the child cries. When the child needs to be changed, the id cries. When the child is uncomfortable, in pain, too hot, too cold, or just wants attention, the id speaks up until his or her needs are met.



The id doesn't care about reality, about the needs of anyone else, only its own satisfaction. If you think about it, babies are not real considerate of their parents' wishes. They have no care for time, whether their parents are sleeping, relaxing, eating dinner, or bathing. When the id wants something, nothing else is important.



Within the next three years, as the child interacts more and more with the world, the second part of the personality begins to develop. Freud called this part the Ego. The ego is based on the reality principle. The ego understands that other people have needs and desires and that sometimes being impulsive or selfish can hurt us in the long run. Its the ego's job to meet the needs of the id, while taking into consideration the reality of the situation.

By the age of five, or the end of the phallic stage of development, the Superego develops. The Superego is the moral part of us and develops due to the moral and ethical restraints placed on us by our caregivers. Many equate the superego with the conscience as it dictates our belief of right and wrong.



In a healthy person, according to Freud, the ego is the strongest so that it can satisfy the needs of the id, not upset the superego, and still take into consideration the reality of every situation. Not an easy job by any means, but if the id gets too strong, impulses and self gratification take over the person's life. If the superego becomes to strong, the person would be driven by rigid morals, would be judgmental and unbending in his or her interactions with the world. You'll learn how the ego maintains control as you continue to read."

Some people just get stuck in the ego phase and lean more towards Id when thinking, "what should I talk about?" Think of the Id and superego like the little devil and angel sitting on your shoulder. You're the ego and you have to decide which way to lean. Unfortunately, when it comes to talking to people, most people find comfort in talking about themselves, and what they know.

Answer 3

It is a fake world with fake people. People care only about themselves and expect to be the center of attention.

Also, 70% are extraverts, which means they like people and it can be annoying, though not necessarily.

I have the same issues, so I avoid people. I loathe small talk.

Answer 4

OMG it would be so nice if people cared more about others!!! I work on the front lines of a very busy medical specialist's office and whether I'm at work or in my personal life, I ask questions as I find people so fascinating, I love hearing about what makes them tick :)

Answer 5

Could it be that it's not 'everone' you meet, just a few which float to the top? I know that if I meet 20 people today and 19 say I look good and only one says I look terrible, guess who I believe? Wierd, huh? -- Rat

Answer 6

Oh my god you are so right. This kid I have not saw in years stopped by and he was on and on about his financials. He was like I purchased this car and that car. My lamp shades are leather etc etc. Anything in the conversation that gave him and op to brag he sure did.

Later the next day my brother and I were talking about that and how people are like that. We tried to brak them down but there is no point. We were expressing how we are not like this and why people have that need. Its like they are trying to build them self up.

Always consider this if you have not a void you do not need fill.

A person content in life never has anything to prove.

Answer 7

Good point. Shows you how many people are so full of themselves. Not everybody. Remember the ones who have better manners.

Answer 8

most people are so self obssessed. but thats about it. u will notice, the more intelligent people would ask how u have been, and do the interveiwing; while the less intelligent people will do all the talking about themselves. I am the latter, also love talking about myself :( and forgets otehr people...shame...

Answer 9

They do that because it's as if they're laying out all their cards on the table and want to know if you like what you see. If it really bothers you, whenever they make the slightest pause, you talk.

Answer 10

This must really bother you.

I don't really care how strangers are and I very rarely listen to their "stuff".

Don't put yourself in the position to have to listen.