ok well i am 14 going on 15.?

Question

well my mom has a court date comming up soon and it is either i move back to my moms or move to my dads and switch schools. i want to move back to my moms house but the judge might not let me. this is her first mark on her record in a long long period of time. i was wondering if i had a chance to move back with her... we have a no contact order, do i have a say when she goes to court. she hit me but she was drunk. i dont know what is going to happen!!!! HELP

Answer 1

I know it sounds bad but she hit you drunk or not. Anyway the court should have appointed you a lawyer if there was a question of custody. But state your opinion none the less. Let the "adults" know how you feel.

Answer 2

Because of your, being over 12 years old, tehy may ask for your input. However, things still may not go your way. Make sure you think very hard about whether or not you want to live with your mom because if you change your mind, you may have to wait until your 18 and can move out on your own. If she hit you once, it can happen again, are you ready for this. Does she drink often? Has she shown remorse for doing it? You should make a list of the pros and cons of living with your mom or dad, then decide which is best for you. That's all the courts want is what is best for the child. Why do you not want to live with your dad? If it's just about not wanting to change schools, it isn't so bad. I've done it lots of times and sometimes it is even better then the last school and I've made better friends too. Change isn't so bad, really. Anyway, good luck in court and I hope everything turns otu in your favour.

Answer 3

Before going to court to state your case (and yes you are old enough to where you should get to testify as to what you want) you need to really think hard about why you want to go back to your mom's. Is it solely so you can stay in your current school and be with your friends? Are you willing to sacrifice your safety and your well being to live with your mother just so you can stay in the same school? Is your dad really the more responsible parent that can help you get through the already tough high school years? Sometimes the best parent is not the parent that will let you do whatever you want just because they are too drunk or self involved to pay attention to what you need--like guidance. High school is hard to get through because your friends become so important and school seems so stupid and opposite to what you want to do. That's where a parent whose paying attention and not drinking can be a huge help. They help to keep you doing the things that are best for you even if they don't feel good at the time. So think about what's going to be best for you in the long run, not just in the moment. Which parent is going to be able to help you the most? Which parent will you safe with? Which parent do you think you will be most likely to graduate from high school with instead of dropping out. And remember, if you're wanting to stay with your mom because you think that she needs you, it's her job to take care of you, not the other way around. At your age you deserve to live with a parent who can be there for you and if that's your dad then that would be the better choice. Only you know what's really going on but when your turn comes to talk with the judge, I hope you consider these issues. I'm sorry that you're having such a rough time.

Answer 4

Don't listen to Princes Bee. Never, Never, Never lie in court or during any court proceedings. Remember the no contact order is there for a reason. If she hit you hard enough for the police to get involved then you might need to sit back and look. Sure people can change but give it time before you go running back over there. I have gone to several jobs where there is repeat domestic violence. Don't put yourself back in that situation. If things are so bad at your dad's house, then you need to speak with your court appointed council and let them know about your living conditions. I'm sure you are scared and worried about your mother, but she could hit you again which might be worse than the first. It always gets that way. I've seen it numerous times. If things are fine at home, move in with your dad and give your mom time to stop drinking. You could ask for supervised (neutral party) visitation until she proves that she will not harm you. Just give it time and good luck.

Answer 5

If she had a no contact order, and she violated it - regardless of her condition - she was completely in the wrong. She slapped you. Obviously she has done it to an excessive amount or she would not have that order.

I understand that you love your mother. And I also understand that you want to stay around all of your friends instead of changing schools. But you have to look at what is right for you. Is it really right to stay in the environment that your mother is providing for you? You are "14 going on 15"; a parental figure that is drunk much of the time and slapping you is NOT the right environment. You should be in an environment that is nurturing and gives you the opportunity to develop morals and self worth. From your "question", it doesn't sound to me like your mother necessarily offers you that environment.

I am not trying to judge. I am trying to give you the "objective" opinion that you obviously wanted, since you posted your question here. You can tell them what your feelings are, but don't be surprised if they still have you move with your father and change schools.

Answer 6

Does dad get drunk and act idiotic too? I know you love your parents, but being drunk was a bad move on your mom's part. Slapping you was worse and whether she was drunk or sober really makes no difference to me, other than making your situation sound all the more horrifying. I feel really badly that you are stuck in this position. I think the judge will listen to your opinion, but he/she is going to be looking for what looks the best/safest place for you. You should have your own youth advocate separate from your parent's legal counsel. You also need personal counseling yourself. Sounds like your parents have put you through the ringer.

I really don't know what will happen. Either way, I am sorry and wish you all the best.

Answer 7

She hit you when she was drunk and you want to go with her just so you don't have to change schools? I say change schools. I know it is rough but better then being with someone who will hit you. Don't say well she was drunk. What you may have not learned yet is that all alcohol does is take away your inhibitions. That means you may normally not do something because you know better BUT you could be brought to do it. So she may get mad at you and hit you when she is sober. Then you will say oh it was just because she was upset. Abuse is abuse. If there is a NO CONTACT ORDER there is proably a good reason to it and proably more to it then just "she hit me but she was drunk". Yeah you can tell the Judge how you feel but I still say you would proably be better going to your father's. If he is worse then tell them how bad he is, sure you would end up in Foster care but that is better then being with your mother. You likely have low self-esteem in teh way you are defending your mother. Not trying to insult you just looking at this as an outside observer.

Answer 8

You need to tell the judge how you feel and that you want to live with your mom.
It might be dificult because the judge might think scence she was drunk and hit you once it can happen again.
But if tou give the judge your request he might grant it.
ask your moms attorney how should you request this.
No harm trying.
Good luck :)

Answer 9

If your mom gets drunk and hits you why do you want to be there? This makes me question how bad it is at your dads.

Answer 10

If she hit you while drunk she will do it while sober.

even under hypnosis you cannot make a person do something that they wouldnot normaly do. I am a recovered alcholic. i never did anything while drunk that i would not do under any normal circumstances.

live with your dad untill you are 18 then worry about your mother.