Four years ago, I developed a crush on a shy redhead girl at my church. It was 'puppy love' at the time, but rather than disappearing after a while, it progressed and I believe myself to be in true love. I give up hours every day to thinking about this girl, cry myself to sleep over her and have been so upset about it for the last two years particularly that I often feel suicidal. She is fifteen and when I leave for university in two years', I will never see her again. I am much, much too shy to even consider approaching her, and don't think this romance and religion should be mixed... I think I have a mental disorder, but could it be true love even though I don't really know her? There is nobody I can tell how I feel and I cannot take the pain.
2006-09-21 09:25:43 · 14 answers · asked by wildebeest 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Grow up.
2006-09-21 09:26:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
true love is not unrequited.
you have very low self esteem and have set your attention on an unattainable girl.
you are worth better. you will find someone you are comfortable with when you learn to be more comfortable with yourself. in the future you will look back at the time you wasted over her and wonder what all the fuss was about.
take some time off of thinking about her. do something else. keep yourself busy.
if you really are thinking of suicide you should get help right away. start with a school counselor if you are uncomfortable talking to your parents.
2006-09-21 09:29:51 · answer #2 · answered by ashley f 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a very common mental disorder called "infatuation".
Tell ya what - go re-read "Romeo & Juliet". You should have already had to read it for Freshman English class. I'll even be helpful and point out the parts you really need to study:
- Act One, Scene One. Romeo sighs over being in deepest purest love with a girl. No name is given.
- Act One, Scene Two. Romeo reads a list of invitations to the Capulets' ball, and sees the name "Rosaline" on the list. Benvolio bets Romeo that he can find another girl at the Capulets' ball that makes him forget all about Rosaline. Romeo swears up and down that will never happen.
- Act One, Scene Five. Romeo lays eyes on Juliet, and says
"Did my heart love till now? forswear it, sight!
For I ne'er saw true beauty till this night."
SO MUCH FOR THAT DEEPEST PUREST LOVE, EH?
2006-09-21 09:35:52 · answer #3 · answered by Katie S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She might not be all you imagine though she might be so much more. You will never know if you never start talking to her. You have two years to figure it out. Time passes so fast it. So start simple, sit near her in church and send a friendly smile her way; maybe a wave. Then eventually get closer to her so that so you can say Hello and maybe ask her out to lunch EVENTUALLY. I had a few guys follow me throughout my school days but they never approached me. Sometimes I wonder WHAT IF THEY HAD? DON'T LET THIS BECOME AN OBSESSION FOR YOU THERE ARE BETTER THINGS IN LIFE YOU COULD DO WITH YOUR TIME.
2006-09-21 10:25:45 · answer #4 · answered by larechiga26 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to speak with someone about why you are feeling the way you are. I think you should try to at least spark a friendship with her and try to casually invite her out with no strings attached. After you get used to being around her and are comfortable in her presence, you may find it easier to reveal how you feel. Ask your parents to find a therapist for you so you can deal with your feelings more effectively. It seems like you may be obsessing over her, and that is unhealthy.
2006-09-21 09:31:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
People always say that your first love is never meant to me. I think that's true. I know its painful but you're young and have many more years ahead of you. She will always have a special place in your heart as your first love - you don't have to deny that. Just remember that life goes on and so will you. If it is really meant to be, you'll find her again.
2006-09-21 09:28:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are bordering, if you haven't already entered, a state of obsession. You have your entire life ahead of you, a whole lot more women to grind you underfoot. At 15, she is far from ready to become your lifelong partner, she is still a child, not to mention jailbait.
Get over it and move on.
2006-09-21 09:31:31 · answer #7 · answered by Dane 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
um, yeah, you should go and get some help. YOu obviously have some major issues if you are thinking about committing suicide over a girl you don't even really know.
2006-09-21 09:31:31 · answer #8 · answered by flashypsw 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really think you need to go to therapy before you hurt someone.
It's not healthy to "give up hours of your day to thinking about a girl".
2006-09-21 09:28:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Consult your pastor, or priest, or rabbi, or the head monk. I don't know, but they will probably be able to offer you advise that's within the churh guidelines.
2006-09-21 09:29:21 · answer #10 · answered by §чﺀﺀчβчﻯ†a 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have a mental disorder.
Just call her up and go see a movie together and talk later.
Bet that all your fears will go away.
2006-09-21 09:27:41 · answer #11 · answered by Angela 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋