2006-09-21 09:22:19 · 27 answers · asked by Solomon Grundy 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
You're suffering from loose bowel movement (LBM). The wet fart produced a 2-inch diameter stain at the back of your light colored slack. You're sitting on your office desk, and the Men's Room is 15 meters away. You cannot take a leave as you're already out of credits. How can you bail yourself out of this predicament?
2006-09-21 09:33:48 · update #1
Note: The term "Leave" here stands for either Vacation, Emergency, or Sick Leave.
2006-09-21 12:46:48 · update #2
Well it is a little late to be asking us stinky. If you knew you had an upset stomach you should have took extra drawers and some plastic zip locks in with you or installed a wiper blade anyway.
Pick up the phone and call in an undie and knicker airdrop from a friend.
2006-09-21 09:32:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What do you mean you can't go to the bathroom while at work due to being "out of credits"? I doubt there is any workplace which forbids an employee from going to the bathroom and if yours is doing so call the labor department and file a complaint. In the meanwhile get your behind out of your chair, put a book or paper behind your fanny and off to the bathroom. Then, rinse out your pants, put them back on and go back to work. If, in future, you know you have this problem, by all means prepare and take extra clothing to work to change into. Also, nobody sitting next to you will want you sitting there with sh*it is your pants!! You smell to high heaven, and your co-workers will appreciate your changing or rinsing off. Don't forget to use paper towels to wash your behind too! Hope this helps, thought your parents would have taught you how to properly clean yourself and care for your own bowel problems though, but hey, sometimes we all need a word or two of common sense as well.
2006-09-21 16:40:13 · answer #2 · answered by Serenity 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Do you think it is funny that the question posted below yours is "please stop the noise". I think it is hilarious!
Also, it can be an answer to your question. If you are having indigestion bad enough to provide you with wet farts you probably had an indicator before one actually materialized... Like WAY before. So pop a Beano before lunch and a couple Tums after. If you still feel wet farts coming on excuse yourself to the facilities and have it in the toilet. Wet farts are never quiet and they are unaccepted by most of society as being "uncontrollable".
Good luck and also try laying off the Mexican food!
2006-09-21 16:44:55 · answer #3 · answered by Rackjack 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Now, is this 'wet fart' the same thing as a Shart? Meaning you tried to fart and a little s.h.i.t came out? If so, you need the bathroom quick, wet some towels down and scrub that skid mark away!
If not, then nothing to worry about. Chug some Pepto Bismol and good luck with your back fires.
2006-09-21 16:26:00 · answer #4 · answered by Kevin J 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You may just have to say I've had an accident and just go home. We all find ourselves at times in embarrassing situation. But if the bowels are lose there lose. We all must learn to be able to find the humor in life. Even if we are the ones everyone is laughing at.
2006-09-21 16:48:31 · answer #5 · answered by purrfectsandcastle 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Put your under wear on your head and then run trough the office yelling"get it off" (make sure they can see the brown part of your under wear, too. Do this and it will be all better... FOR THE GUYS IN THE OFFICE!!!! hahahhahahahahahhahah.)
2006-09-21 16:28:37 · answer #6 · answered by shoutingchimp 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Get up and air yourself out before anyone realizes it was you.
Or pull and Jim Carrey in Liar, Liar and let everyone know it was you...
.... or pull a Peter Griffin and blame it on someone else.
2006-09-21 16:24:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Act like nothing happend and tell ppl they just imagine things and go on your merry way, perhaps to wistle a song to boot, like...Always look at the bright side of life.
2006-09-21 16:28:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
There is a very simple answer to your question. Drink another beer, it'll make it all go away. Until tomorrow
2006-09-21 16:24:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
better out than in mate. maybe pack a little bog paper between your cheeks and fart on with pride. enjoy
2006-09-21 16:28:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋