He has always loved me and i have always loved him....we have known each other for so many years but he could never admit how he feels so i am not either....!
i love him so much...that it hurts me!!!I don't know what to do...!I can't move on...because this should be cruel to other people and i will hurt others....how can i make him admit it...??
2006-09-21 08:42:03 · 21 answers · asked by ? 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
it's not a matter of pride or ego....
2006-09-21 08:49:20 · update #1
Its tricky here. He's probably asking himself the same question or else you could be misguided and he likes things this way...nothing established and you two going easy. Any step you take then carries some amount of risk. You could come out well and good or suffer irreparable damage to your friendship.
You could do several things. Put it to him...does he love you or would he mind if someone else comes and says they love you??? You could send him a card expressing your love on his birthday or on Val's day. There are many approaches....or you could have your friends or a friend of his who knows you both ask him. Its up to you...which approach you feel comfortable with.
2006-09-23 01:58:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, here's the short, blunt answer:
You can't make another person "admit" that he loves you.
The long answer is:
Life and love is about risk...nothing ventured, nothing gained. If for whatever reason he is too shy, too frightened, too conflicted or whatever to admit how he feels, why does that naturally conclude that you're not going to either?
I think you should get up the courage, take the risk of being rebuffed or rejected, and tell him exactly how you feel, and then ask him how he feels about 1) you and 2) what you've just said.
This will at least clarify where you're at with him, what he's willing to admit and not, and help you think about how to resolve (i.e, either go forward together to explore the possibilities...or move on).
Best to you both.
2006-09-21 15:45:47 · answer #2 · answered by Timothy W 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If it's been years and he can't admit it.....then you should probably give up on hearing it. I know that hurts but it often can be a sign of underlying issues. Personally, if I couldn't stand it, I'd take action to find another relationship that might be more fulfilling to my needs and I would certainly talk it over with this man before I ever made the split so he'd understand exactly what was happening....and why.
2006-09-21 15:45:14 · answer #3 · answered by Shadow 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Men are different then women. They dont' always know how to express their feelings. Take the inititive and tell him how you feel. If he doesn't say it back, then I would be careful if he really does. It's ok to make the first move. And if you don't want to be the first to say it, be patient and he'll be ready when he's ready. Guys take longer, so give him time and don't rush it.
2006-09-21 15:47:03 · answer #4 · answered by ConfusedK 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, please don't take offense, but it sounds to me like you're both acting a bit childish about the whole thing, and one of you is going to have to take the risk of being the first to disclose your feelings, or else the stress will cause deterioration. Hey, I have an idea: Since you're both a bit reluctant and shy (and let's admit it, a bit stubborn) you could try writing him one of those school-girly notes that lets him check off the box next to how he feels about you. You know, something like:
You love me? ___
You just want to be my friend? ___
You think I smell like a baboon's butt? ____
2006-09-21 15:48:06 · answer #5 · answered by Zebra4 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, first of all I think that if you really do love this person and you know he loves you to, then just go out and say it because you love him right? I know that this might not be the best advise but think about it
2006-09-21 15:46:52 · answer #6 · answered by ebacebedo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The expression of love is hard for some people. I would rather be with someone who showed their love in actions rather than talked about it all the time, and didn't show it.
2006-09-21 15:46:49 · answer #7 · answered by Jabberwock 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF YOU KNOW HE LOVES YOU AND HE KNOWS YOU LOVE HIM, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO HEAR IT? LET IT GO. YOU CAN'T MAKE SOMEONE DO SOMETHING THAT IS NOT LOVE THAT IS WANTING TO CONTROL ANOTHER PERSON AND THEIR FEELINGS. WHY ARE YOU SO IMPATIENT? IF IT HURTS THEN IT IS NOT LOVE. WELL I GUESS HE HAS MOVED ON WITHOUT YOU AND THAT IS WHY YOU ARE HAVING THIS PITY PARTY.HOW CAN YOU THINK OF HURTING AN INNOCENT PERSON? ARE YOU SICK? GET CONTROL OF YOURSELF. AND I DON'T CARE IF THIS UPSETS YOU AS THE TRUTH WILL DO THAT, BUT YOU ARE SELFISH, IMMATURE AND MEAN NO WONDER HE LEFT YOU YOU NEED TO GROW BOTH EMOTIONALLY AND MENTALLY AND THEN LOOK FOR LOVE
2006-09-21 15:54:35 · answer #8 · answered by jk poet 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why wont you say it??? Is it your pride thats in the way, cause you dont want to say it first?? Thats pretty lame. If you love him, tell him, and if he still refuses to say it back, its time to MOVE ON. But you should at least be an adult about it and tell him how you feel about him.
2006-09-21 15:44:11 · answer #9 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can not make him admit it and if you do he will just resent you for it later. I think that you sound a little young and just maybe you should work on your homework and your chores then worring about forcing someone to tell you that they love you
2006-09-21 15:45:28 · answer #10 · answered by Amber 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋