I am 18 yrs old very shy as a person nice to everone , always trying to be friendly, and quiet unless i now you. I dont think at 110 pounds and 5 ft 5 or 5ft 6 that i am short or fat. My face is clear i dont get pimples that much anymore. I wear very little makeup and make sure my hair is always neat and dresses neatly too. So i dont think i am ugly but i always attract guys that treat me like property and are possesive/controling/manipulative. Is it me?
2006-09-21 07:16:27 · 46 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
These are the types of guys that will generally ask me out i dont understand what i am doing to attract these people. My parents are controling enough i dont need any one else to be!
2006-09-21 07:18:44 · update #1
normally i find this out a month into seeing a guy my last 3 bf have been this way.
2006-09-21 07:23:24 · update #2
try and give everyone a chance too.
2006-09-21 07:23:53 · update #3
Not a slut either i only had sex with one guy after a year then he hit me and my parents got a restraining order.
2006-09-21 07:35:48 · update #4
no you sound good i odnt see that the problem is
2006-09-21 07:17:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
No hun, nothing is wrong with you. Sounds like you are just looking in the wrong direction. It takes a-while to find that right someone, I know it took me a failed marriage and then some hard looking to find my bo, but don't give up, just be carefull and keep an eye out for mr. right. I'm sure you have heard this a lot but 18 is still young and sooner or later you'll find someone really nice and just your style.
If you look for a slightly older guy, a few years, usually thoes are the best because they are more attuned to you. You know the saying, girls mature faster than boys.
another thing, I remember in highschool, when I was that age, the guys I met were all in the same circle of friends. This could be where the issue lies if this is the case. Guys talk too.
2006-09-21 07:24:15 · answer #2 · answered by aflownes 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe because you are so quiet and shy and non aggressive they feel like they can control you. Being quiet is okay but you have to be assertive to protect yourself from those who would try to walk all over you. Remember to express your opinions- make a statement- don't just go along until it becomes habit for someone else to always make the decisions- soon you have no control. Not that it is your fault - some guys are controlling and manipulative. Heres hoping you will meet a good guy and get out of the loop!! Good Luck
2006-09-21 07:21:31 · answer #3 · answered by therealprinsess 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Not being funny, but if you are a slut( I am not implying that at all, so do not be offended) and all of the decent guys know it, then you are not going to get a decent guy. And its has much to do with the fact that you are dealing with 18 year old guys who aren't always ready to treat a lady like a lady. Don't fret. The right one will show up, don't give up hope and settle for anything less than what you deserve. Took me that long to find the perfect woman, but when I did, it was worth all of the trouble from the past. You'll find him.
2006-09-21 07:23:04 · answer #4 · answered by 2ndammendmentsupporter 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You may like the ones who give you the impression that there dangerous and that can be a turn on for most women but ask your self this when was the last time a nice guy came up to you and you pushed him away? Instead of thinking hes boring or not cute enough spend more time with him and see what happens. You may find that the nice one will be just what you need.
2006-09-21 07:25:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The problem is society, not you.
Boys and i mean boys at that age don't have
a clue how to treat a women (remember
women mature faster). Unfortunately, they
don't really learn how to treat a women until
there in the 30's or 40's.. You can blame
society for all these f*cked up shows, MTV
video's etc for displaying inappropriate treatment
of women. Granted we are treated better in the USA
then in Iraq or Afghanistan, but still we are used and abused
by selfish, boyish men. Alot of women in the USA that allow
men to disrespect them, can be blamed for the ongoing
disrespect we receive.
Be different, stand up for yourself and DO NOT ALLOW
some boyish idiot to tear apart yourself esteem. Honey
you sound fine and you may need to be start to be aggressive
and talk to the "shy" guys. They are exactly what you need
and when you get to know them, they will be exactly what
your looking for. Stay away from the aggressive hood rats...
2006-09-21 07:28:35 · answer #6 · answered by desire4reallove 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
One thing jumps out at me here, and please don't take this the wrong way.
You do a very good job at describing your exterior self, but I'm not hearing you talk about your inner beauty and nice qualities.
In my experience, guys who are excessively focused on outer beauty often aren't mature enough to see you as much more than an accessory. Thus, they don't see you for the wonderful person that you are, because to them you are really just a possession.
If I were in your shoes I think I'd work on meeting guys as friends, really getting to know each other on the inside. Go for the guys who are great listeners and can handle talking about emotions. Give it some time, and see if one of them is the kind of guy you'd like to have as your boyfriend.
Remember, it's YOUR choice, not his. Be very selective. You deserve it.
2006-09-21 07:36:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just as a knee-jerk response I'd say, "Yes, at least partially...."
How most women go about picking men for relationships has a LOT to do with the relationship they have with their fathers. I remember reading once that the relationships we have as adults are an attempt to "win back" the kind of love and attention we didn't get from our parents when we were children. So we end up picking partners who in some way resemble that parent, in an attempt to relive that childhood scenario and somehow set it right.
You might consider getting some counseling on the matter, if you think it might help....
2006-09-21 07:19:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Whoa, are you my long lost twin. I fit that same exact description. The physical part and the part where I attract a**holes. I'm twenty six and thought I would never find anyone that would respect me or treat me good. I got stuck with jerk after jerk. I was cheated on, emotionally abused, used to get to my sister, etc. You name it. Then, 2 years ago I met the man of my dreams. I couldn't be happier. It just takes time. I just took all my previous relationships as lessons for my future. I guess it finally worked for me. It will work for you too. Your time will come when you will find Mr. Right. Just be patient.
2006-09-21 07:26:11 · answer #9 · answered by sexy lady 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Some guys can spot a girl with low or no self esteem a mile away. They also can tell if a girl has been abused, in any form, just by looking at her. I dated a guy like that. He told me he spotted me the minute I walked in the room & I was an easy mark. If that does not apply to you maybe you need to look elsewhere for a guy.
Hope this helps.
2006-09-21 07:21:02 · answer #10 · answered by grrl 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it is....I believe you need to be more selective, don't be so quick to jump into a relationship with just anyone....Patience is the first teaching.....your soulmate is out there.....and that soulmate WILL treat you with the Wisdom, Love, Respect, Bravery, Honesty,Humility, and Truth that you deserve and are entitled to. Stay strong.
Women are the first teachers, their teachings begin when the child is still in the womb, and only begin to diminish when the father, grandparents, and others become the additional teachers.
The woman is the foundation on which Nations are built, she is the heart of her Nation. If her heart is strong and her mind is clear then her people are strong, and they know their purpose....the woman is the centre of EVERYTHING....remember these words....your soulmate will know these words
2006-09-21 07:48:37 · answer #11 · answered by l00kstwice 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋