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I've been dating a guy for about 2 1/2 months and the other night I borrowed a DVD box set that I bought him a while back. He doesnt normally let people borrow his things because he's compulsive about his posessions esp. movies, and because people tend to borrow and never return.
Well.. I had the DVD's in my room, and my roommate wanted to watch them - i said it was fine as long as he put them back, he didnt. He left them on the DVD player and his dog got them. Tore all the packaging.
I'm going to buy the guy i'm seeing a new set since the packaging is all but destroyed but should i tell him it's a replacement or just let him think that it's his old ones?
I don't want him to think he can't trust me with his things (my roommate wont be borrowing anything else of mine) but his old ones had a tiny little tear on the inner packaging when we bought it.. so he will be able to tell the diff. if he looks.

Tell him and hope he can still trust me or dont and hope he doesnt notice?

2006-09-21 06:09:34 · 31 answers · asked by attila 6 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

I won't straight lie to him - if he notices I'll tell him that my roommates dog ate the other ones packaging.

2006-09-21 06:10:12 · update #1

31 answers

I would tell him. I mean its not like your not replacing them. He should respect you for that. It was a mistake and it happens.

2006-09-21 06:13:24 · answer #1 · answered by jam_psb 4 · 0 0

Ur roommate did not mean to have them destroyed, it was an accident. replace and tell him, if u start lying about this kind of stuff and he finds out how is he going to believe u down the road when u pop in at 2 in the morning and tel him u were out with friends. The road of trust starts very small, till it becomes the four lane hi-way.

2006-09-21 06:15:23 · answer #2 · answered by erker34 2 · 0 0

To be honest i think it is fine to tell him it got damaged and you replaced it. This is more than fair.
IF someone is really that anal about their stuff then that can quickly become a rally annoying character trait in a boyfriend.
Accidents happen and if he can't get over it think how he will be about other stuff. He will mess up too and you wouldn't put him through the mill.
Tell him and see how he reacts - if he is horrible about it i don't htink he will be good boyfriend material. You have a replacement for him - i would say thats above and beyond the call of duty.

2006-09-21 06:14:08 · answer #3 · answered by Bebe 4 · 0 0

Go out and buy another set like that one. Don't open it and try to hide that its new. Hand it to him and tell him what happen, let him know that you will *borrow* anything of his again without asking and let him know that your roommate won't be watching or borrowing anything of your anymore in the future. Be very nonshalont about it, like you borrowing it was natural and not a problem. He may get upset, but he will be happy that you are conciderate enough to go out and rebuy something that got distroyed. Blessed be.......

2006-09-21 06:15:04 · answer #4 · answered by shy&gental 4 · 0 0

I would go ahead and replace the DVD set. It's a shame that he's so particular about his possessions, but if he's had a history of loaning them out, and not having them returned, I can certainly understand his hesitation. I would mention to him that you made the effort to replace it, since a mishap occurred while you borrowed it. Perhaps he will be even more appreciative of your considerations by you taking responsibility, and more understanding of your sincerity in valuing his things. He might even appreciate the "newer" packaging. Worst scenario is that he won't loan anymore items, but you've taken the responsibility and ultimately done the right thing by not lying to him, and replacing it.

2006-09-21 06:19:37 · answer #5 · answered by Manatee 5 · 0 1

I'd get a new set and give it to him, make sure the new set you get is exactly like the old one. If he notices down the line that it was a new set, then tell him what happened. But if he doesnt notice or ask you dont mention it. This way its not lying, its just not telling him what happened.

2006-09-21 06:16:59 · answer #6 · answered by cat00415 2 · 0 0

Buy the replacement and put a little card on it that says: This was not yours but a replacement. I am SO sorry ....
If he asks what has happened, tell the truth on his face. No need to cover anything, cause it will lead you to other lies or self defence.

2006-09-21 06:14:14 · answer #7 · answered by shirleythe_24may1975 2 · 0 0

What a predicament indeed. Let's see....what would I do?
I would learn from my mistake...promise to myself never to do anything like that again...and get him a new one. Is there a way you can make the same tiny tear? It better be identical, because with his order obsession- he will be able to tell....he probably looked at that tear everytime he opened it in the past. If he still realizes it- then print this question with the answers and blame me.

2006-09-21 06:16:59 · answer #8 · answered by justmemimi 6 · 0 1

If he is like you say then he will probably notice anyway. You should make your roommate pay for the set because it was his dog that did the damage.

2006-09-21 06:14:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Replace them and be honest with him about what happened. Either way he's going to form his own opinion concerning if you can be trusted or not and threre's nothing you can do to manipulate the situation. Communication and honesty are key in this situation.

2006-09-21 06:13:56 · answer #10 · answered by ? 6 · 0 0

I would make your roommate pay for those movies, not you!!

Tell the guy you've been dating the truth. He'll think your very responsible for returning them even if they were old or new!

2006-09-21 06:12:36 · answer #11 · answered by DrPepper 6 · 1 0

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