I used to go out with my best friend & we were happy for nearly two yrs, he then joined the army and moved to a different country, after about 6months of doing the long distance thing he decided he didnt wanna stay with me, this was last october. Since then has has been out in Iraq, before he left he told me he still loves me.
I don't feel the same about him anymore but lately he has been calling me n telling me that he wants me back & wud do ne thin.
I'm now seeing a guy that i knew from years ago and its really nice not having to deal with such a serious relationship. (i'm starting to really like him)
My ex doesn't know that i'm seeing this new bloke( i dnt wanna tell him while he's out in Iraq) but now he wants me to visit him in germany when he comes home bcz he thinks that my feelings will change when i see him again, but i really don't know what to do,
Do you think my feelings will change if i see him?
Should i just see how it goes with my new bloke??
HELP!!!
2006-09-21 03:31:53 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He still lives away, even if i did go out to see him we would be back to doing the long distance relationship thing again....
I haven't seen my ex since March just before he went out to Iraq n he didn't wanna get back with me then.
Is it not just really cruel to tell him about the new guy when he's out in Iraq??
2006-09-21 03:39:24 · update #1
You have moved on...tell your ex you have a new boyfriend ...that way he can move on!!
2006-09-21 03:33:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wouldnt tell him while he's in Iraq. The best way I think is to wait untill he comes back then either tell him then or visit him in Germany (tell your bloke your going visiting a good friend you havent seen in ages) and tell him. If your considering getting back with him Id visit him as a friend and see what feelings may come flooding back when you actually see him as that might help you.
If he decided he didnt want to continue the relationship then I wouldnt get back with him, but I think being in Iraq has made him realise what he's missing since he let you get away. Personally I wouldn't get back with him because he ended it not you so why should he have another chance when you have a fab new guy.
2006-09-21 03:56:16 · answer #2 · answered by babybitch69 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep going with the new man. This so called best friend didn't want to see you when it was convenient to him and now he's changed his mind but you've moved on.
Tell him that as he didn't want to see you anymore you found someone who does. Of course putting it a bit nicer than that might be an idea ;)
Don't drop everything for him, even if your feelings do change when you see him remember he dumped you once and he could do it again. Even if he still loves you and has all this time, don't you think he could have considered your feelings a little instead of dropping this on you when you're moving on and have found someone you're starting to get feelings for?
His loss to be honest ;)
2006-09-21 03:35:20 · answer #3 · answered by Andromeda Newton™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have guy near to you,it's better for U!What can U get with long distance relationship?Lonely nights,phone talks,photos...
It's maybe selfish,but give a chance to the bloke next to U,and tell your ex that U don't feel the same anymore about him!He told U that he don't want U,and he didn't care,and now when he needs something...
2006-09-21 03:51:46 · answer #4 · answered by Yasna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ex's are Ex's for a reason & if he is still a good friend, he will understand you being in a new relationship...
1 thing I think both men & women HATE is to be led on, thinking they still have a shot, yet the person they think they have a shot at feels differently & won't say and won't act any differently while speaking to them..
Be honest - whether he's in Iraq or Germany or BFE... he broke it off originally, just tell him it's permanent.
2006-09-21 03:37:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people say that when your man leaves, your true feelings are then revealed about how you actually feel for that person. If you still love him then just keep that bond there. If you can only see him as a friend then just try to keep that friendship if he wants it. If not then try to go on with your life. About going to Germany, I think I would go but just try to keep the tension off by telling him to just act like friends til you can get comfortable around him again.
2006-09-21 03:39:15 · answer #6 · answered by megan_trigg2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you see your ex I can almost guarantee some of your old feeling will emerge. However, they will dissipate soon after you leave and things will become more complicated.
You're probably better off staying with your new "bloke"
If you go back to your ex you run the risk of not only losing your ex, but your new "bloke" as well. I wouldn't see your ex when he comes back.
2006-09-21 03:35:16 · answer #7 · answered by bad_dog76 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
to b straight with you, if you are going to see him b straight with him and tell him the truth cos its going to help you if he still has dat love for you and i strongly think you should also find out if the new bloke also has this feelings you have for him cos if he doesnt then why not try your luck and see if your feelings for ur ex will come back again. there is an adage that says that the devil you know is better than the angel you dont know
2006-09-21 04:05:10 · answer #8 · answered by lizzy f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All I can tell you is follow your heart girl...If you really love the bloke you are with then you should stay.. but if your heart if telling you that you belong somewhere else...then go...dont let your life be wasted by fear. And only you can say if seeing him is going to change everything you should see him and if it does change everything then you know what you gotta do.
2006-09-21 03:38:08 · answer #9 · answered by LUCKYGIRL 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are just feeling sorry for your ex because he might die in Iraq and then you'd feel guilty. I know I'd prefer someone's honesty to their pity - tell him you have a new fella.
You are only responsible for your happiness, not someone else's. Enjoy your new man.
2006-09-21 03:37:59 · answer #10 · answered by Trin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be truthful with your ex and tell him you have moved on but you would like to stay friends with him, i'm sure he will understand, if not then he is not worth having as a friend.
2006-09-21 03:36:12 · answer #11 · answered by angel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋