I am 18 and with little or no social life or even contact. My parents never let me do anything in high school like going to the mall exc. or movies with friends. I am not kidding i only ever saw my friends at school and a bf was out of the question. I made a few attempts but at 17 they were still asking to meet my friends parents and giving my friends the 5th degree so most did not even want to visit me. My dads motto was school is not for socializing. Senior year i barley was allowed to go to homecoming but i did meet a bf there and well messed things up badly with a pregnancy scare drama which led to complete isolation. I was never a bad kid and always kept good grades and never snuck out or did anything. I am now in my first year of college doing well so far but feel out of place socially. I only really have three friends two are still in highschool and i feel lost and angry with my parents. I feel socially cripled but they pay for my college tuition.
2006-09-21 03:29:01 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
now my parents care about me but i feel like i am suffocating i still go to bed at 9:00 at night and never allowed to go out without there permission not even my 13 yrs old cousin is treated this way.
2006-09-21 03:30:02 · update #1
I was invited to a club and my mom panikicked and turned blue and i was grounded for even asking. I am a community college student there as a transfer student. So i have to wait till next year to dorm. Make matters worse i am also very shy!
2006-09-21 03:31:13 · update #2
Join a Sorority. Move into a dorm and get student loans.
2006-09-21 03:31:07 · answer #1 · answered by C K Platypus 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel. My parents was the same way. I am unsocial most of the time. How are your parents keeping up with you in college? How do they know what your doing? Go out and have fun. Just don't go too wild and get yourself into trouble. I know what your parents did was wrong, but they did what they knew to keep you out of harms way. And when you had a little freedom, you messed it up, which only made things worse. All you can do now is try to become more socialable. Parents don't understand that doing this will damage a child. A child needs to learn to be independent and responsible. If you keep a child locked up all the time, they will become out of control when they are grown, which will lead to bad things for them in the future. They can be realeased and do something that they can't undo and it will ruin their lives forever. I am not saying you need to let your kids do whatever. You have to set boundaries, limitations and trust. Anyway, try to make as many friends as you can. Make yourself go out there and talk to people and have fun. Good luck.
2006-09-21 10:41:56 · answer #2 · answered by Xena 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are 18 now...you are at the legal age to move out and get your own place...seems like you have over protective parents....if you can afford it...ask a friend who already has a place if you could share, that way you will have your freedom and you can prove to your parents that you are a responsible grown up who can make her own life her own, they may not like it but they cant stop you either......good luck my dear...your parents do care but i really think they are being a little bit to hard on you
2006-09-21 10:41:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes i feel that life is an endless struggle, against the thgs dat are beyond our control and for the thgs dat we wanna keep close to our hearts. countless chances forsaken, silent tears of regret. their stories make me wanna cry. such twisted family backgrds. truly unexpected. children are the innocent ones that suffer frm broken marriages. nobody ever wanted to be born into a shitty family. but i guess no mothers want their kids to hate them. how do they tolerate such psychotic behaviour. it leaves emotional and physical scars. marks on the skin will fade, but the emotional turmoil could last a lifetime.
2006-09-21 10:31:41 · answer #4 · answered by Princess illusion 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably well have to wait for that dorm room to be free. Your folks are scared to death to lose you or to have you get hurt. they are just trying to protect you. They are going about it all wrong but it comes from their heart. When you get into the dorm live your own life.....
2006-09-21 10:36:52 · answer #5 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Jennifer, I am so very sorry that you are having such a bad time with your parents. I am a Mom to two kids, a daughter that is 21 and a son 16. I love my kids with all my heart, and unfortunately we as parents make mistakes. I have made my fair share, but I don't understand parents that won't let their children grow. See I have the opposite problem with my 16 year old son, I try to push him out. He needs to go to the school dances, and go to the movies with friends, and he's not interested. So, see I am making a mistake in pushing him.
As most parents we want our children to have better than we have or had. Your parents I truely hope love you so much, that they are trying to protect you, and they don't realize that they are hurting you in the process. I know of a young girl similar to you, she went to college fell in love with the first guy to pay attention to her, now she is a unwed mother of a little girl, and where is he? good question... When you had the pregnancy scare in highschool, you provide to them they could trust you with your future. I am sorry to hurt your feelings, but you disappointed them. I understand how things like this can happen, and they should hold it over your head forever, you were just so lost and lonely that you made a mistake. We all make them.
I like to know who the kids are with, and their families, This is a mean cruel world, and I would like to protect my babies as best as I can, but I also know they have to make their own choices. You are now a young woman, and it's time you have the right to make your life your own. And if you make the wrong decisions, then it's on your own shouldars.
Start doing little things, like going to a football game, join a club at school, a good one would be a church organized one, and start meeting people your own age. Let me give you a peice of advice, don't believe everything everyone tells you. There are people out there that are just waiting to take advantage of the innocent. Tell Mom and Dad, sit down and talk to them. Tell them you understand you made a huge mistake back in highschool, but you need to grow up now. Ask them for their help. Tell them you joined a club at school, tell them when the meetings are, and that you will be attending them. That you respect them and love them, but you have got to start doing somethings for yourself, and meeting new people, and doing new things. Start out small, earn their trust, if you go somewhere and say you will back in 2 hours, be back in 2 hours! If you go to a club meeting, don't come home drunk or drugged up! Have fun, but be safe. Honey, I pray that they truely love you and want the best for you-and that they are just scared that this mean old world is going to hurt you. But that's your right as a human being that if you get hurt, is to learn from your mistakes, and learn to pick yourself up, and go on! Please sit down and talk with them, don't yell or scream, speak with respect, and don't throw a fit if it doesn't go your way....just back off, and save it for another day.
You can do this, and it's not going to be easy, and see if the school offers some kind of counseling, it wouldn't hurt to have some help to work through some of this anger.
Last resort, you may have to leave home. Pack the bags, and get a job, and file for Pell grants to pay for school. I would hate to see this happen, but if they can't start cutting the apron strings, you may have to. I will be praying for you, and I hope you can get through to your parents, and that you can come up with a solution that is a good healthy one for all of you.
God bless us all........................
2006-09-21 11:02:28 · answer #6 · answered by totallylost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋