Im also working and found the right school to transfer to so i can work and take care of the baby. The father is going to be involved in the child's life. Im just want to know how i should tell my parents without them overreacting.
2006-09-21 03:26:28 · 21 answers · asked by kendrana6969 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
First, I am assuming that you are unmarried and your relationship to the father would be important. As previously mentioned, your parents are likely to be upset. I am speaking as a parent. I believe they will be upset about how this will impact your future. They only want what is best for you.
I think the best way to tell them would be to prepare them in advance that you need to speak to them about something important. Second, think in advance about the logistics of this child. How will you take care of it, support it and what involvement will the father have? Try hard not to be defensive - realize how worried they will be for you and this child. Help reduce their concerns by letting them see that you understand the seriousness of this and the types of things you are going to do to put your life and that of your child's on the right track. Acknowledge your parents concerns and tell them you will consider all of their advice. Once you have had a chance to absorb all of the information and they have had a chance to get used to the idea, sit down with them again and talk about it. I think that the more you acknowledge their worries and concerns the quicker you can move on to productive conversation and plans. Good luck and God Bless.
2006-09-21 03:43:58 · answer #1 · answered by Linda G 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think that this is far too deep a question to be answered by strangers on the internet. As a mother I know that I would, initially, be upset if my daughter was in your situation. It is possible that your parents' immediate reaction will be somewhat negative, if it is, then remember they only want the best for you. If it were my daughter I would hope that she would ask her GP or somebody who can advise and who is not closely involved. There should be someone working in the college who would be able to discuss this and offer advice. Whatever happens do not let a rift develop between you and your parents. Give them time to absorb the information and decide how to deal with it. There will be lots of things to discuss involving your future, your boyfriend's future and your baby's future - you will need the love and support of everyone around you. I was a single parent, following divorce when my own daughter was a year old, so I know how tough it can be. Good Luck, hope it all works out for you.
2006-09-21 03:46:12 · answer #2 · answered by miss judgement 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, you're an adult now. You were an adult the day your graduated highschool. And now you've already made adult dicisions, and you've made plans to deal with those consequences. Thats all your parents need to know.
While they will surely be upset (this after all is their biggest fear, you away from them at college getting pregnant alone and at the start of your whole life) they will come to terms with it.
I'd take your childs father with you, so you all can meet. And you all can remain on good terms. You'll find you need your parents more now than ever. Being a single mom is really hard.
If things do melt down between you and your parents, try to keep the lines of communication open, but realize that you have to do whats best for your baby. And what you've decided is for its father to play a role, and for you to continue your education to provide it with a good life. You'll have to follow through on those plans whether mom and dad want to hold your hand or not.
Iam proud of you for stepping up to the plate. I hope your man is able to continue with those same actions. Its hard, but you've made up your mind and thats most of the battle right there. You'll make it momma.
2006-09-21 03:41:46 · answer #3 · answered by amosunknown 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get ready for the overreaction, because that is precisely what will happen first.
I would actually write down all the plans that you have made and the reasoning behind them. Parents only every hear one small portion of bad news at a time. If you try to do it in a phone call, or even in person, chances are that they will be "I'm pregnant" and not anything else afterwards. So write everything down, every detail of why and how and where, and then try to tell them in person. When they have the expected reaction, you can leave them the letter and tell them that you will get back to them when they've calmed down, and take yourself off for a walk. Oh, and make sure the boyfriend is present...the parents will NOT be impressed if he's too chicken to confront them in person.
2006-09-21 03:34:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
You should say, "Mom and Dad, I'm going to give birth to a child so that a stable, infertile couple can enjoy the most precious gift they will ever have, and this child will have the best life I could possibly hope for for him/her. I will need you by my side to support me through this selfless and responsible decision. I will need you to hold my hand and allow me to cry on your shoulder. It will be difficult for a short time, but I am willing to make the best out of my mistake. I know that babies are not pets, experiments or property and I have a moral obligation to act in this child's best interest."
How could you even consider doing otherwise? "Being involved in the child's life" is a superficial commitment that the baby-daddy is making to keep you appeased until he decides what he's really doing. You are planning on knowingly bringing a disadvantaged, neglected and parentally-abandoned child into the world. Please step up to the plate and do the right thing. You ae not ready and you are being way too idealistic. The father is DEFINITELY not ready. A child should not be made to pay the price and to wait while you get your life in order.
P.S. The chances of your finishing college with a baby are very very low.
~~Amen, "john d"!! You scored big points with ME! These questions make my heart ache because selfishness and idealism are allowed to supersede so many children's welfare and basic human needs. Maybe you have to be a REAL parent, like us, to even comprehend. Taking the printed answers to the parents is a GREAT idea.
2006-09-21 04:03:47 · answer #5 · answered by georgia b 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Hey wazup is best you tell your mother because the allways find out by there dreams or heartburn or body shape u call them on the phone or go in person say mom and dad u know i love you but i got something to tell you well im such of such weeks or month pregnacy i just found and tell them that u still finna attend school till the baby get here
Thanks 4 listening to me bye the way GOOD LUCK and Congrulation
2006-09-21 03:35:45 · answer #6 · answered by Shanta e 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best to tell the asap, so they can help you out. You're in college NOT high school. Sure, you made a mistake. Who doesn't???
Oh, I guess the guy with an attitude who answered just before me is perfect!
Anyway, although you may be having a child a little sooner than planned, your parents will get over it and be thrilled to have a grandchild on the way. You've got a plan - stick with it, everything will work out. Just wait and see...Best wishes!
2006-09-21 03:45:36 · answer #7 · answered by can'tgo55 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
How you tell them depends alot on your relationship with your parents.
1. If you have a happy go lucky relationship. Buy a card that says something like Congratulations you are going to be grandparents.
2. If they are very traditional. I would invite them over or go to dinner at their house with the babies father and let them know that you are going to tell them something that is important at that dinner. Set it up soon.
3. If they are high strung- You might want to have a "meeting" with them at a public place, such as a restaurant, church, or park. Where they will not be as apt to scream.
The sooner you tell them the better. You do not want them to hear it through the grapevine, or for them to feel left out.
Make sure you have your plans that you have made wrote down (cheat sheet) because of high emotion and nerves you might forget things that they will ask. Congrats!!! Enjoy your Baby.
2006-09-21 03:57:30 · answer #8 · answered by iamdreama 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
There is no way to tell them without shocking them, because it will be a shock. I have 4 grandchildren, and I told my parents when I was 15 I was pregnant and I lived through it and you will be just fine. You made it a lot longer than I did. I hope everything turns out as good for you as it did for me. Good luck..
2006-09-21 03:37:50 · answer #9 · answered by flip103158 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sit down with them either at home or go out for dinner somewhere, just tell them like this :
" mom, dad there is something that i need to tell you and i just don't want ya'll to get mad, it's something that i did not want to happen but it did and there is nothing that can be done at this point (by this time they will already suspect but hope it is not true) i am very sorry to disapoint you but i am pregnant, i hope that you can forgive me for this unplanned pregnancy i know that i should have been more careful but sometimes this happens and i just want you to know that the father is going to be involved and i am going to continue school and i have thought ahead." if you sit and speak like an adult they will see you as an adult and probably believe that you can do this, they will probably be disapointed but will get over it as soon as the little bundle of joy has been born. i would have emailed this to you but there was no address on your bio sorry it was so long
2006-09-21 03:49:48 · answer #10 · answered by treys girl 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋