This is a question for the people who favor physical punishment of kids. You always try to justify this by saying your kids will do "horrible things" or something similar if you don't.... Can you tell me exactly what are these "horrible things" that children can do? I mean, yeah they make mistakes, they do things wrong, but why do you speak of them as if they were little monsters or criminals? Please give me examples of what are these terrible crimes that children can commit for which you think they should get punished this way?
And do you really think that all the children who don't get spanked become criminals? I mean you should know enough examples that it's not so. Or do you think it is a desaster if your child develops a sense of critical thinking, makes up his own mind, takes his own decisions... ??
2006-09-20 22:06:15 · 9 answers · asked by Elly 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
And if your kid is "difficult", have you ever thought he or she might have a problem and maybe you did something wrong?
2006-09-20 22:10:28 · update #1
i think even if you believe or believed in spanking our children do not need that, i think the best thing to do with our kids is listen and teach them how to survive so they have the life skills they need to grow up, i have found with having a child with autism its better to get people who understand whats going on with him to help me understand what to do as a parent but alot of people do not want to admit they do not know what they are doing..maybe they think the world will look down upon them but see for me it was a good thing to learn what was going on because then i could help him..yes kids no matter whos they can drive you batty but you have to keep up with them, and let them know your there, but i dont think spankings work anymore..
and no i do not think children are born bad, but i do think sometimes the places they live the people they choose to hang with can help them make that choice..
One problem now days seems to be divorced parents and both parents work, or they are not treated like people, the parents seem to have in their head put the fear of G-d in them..your child does need to understand your in charge but also your child needs to understand that you are there for them and the most important thing is their well being
2006-09-20 22:16:36 · answer #1 · answered by away right now 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We use both listening and spanking when it comes to raising our children. We do not beat them, nor cause them physical harm. As parents we listen to why our children did this or that. We punish them by taking away something for a couple of weeks, or don't let them spend the night somewhere etc. We try to show them solutions before something is done wrong, but, there have been times when my son has literally punched my daughter, thus he gets a spanking and has stopped. This same son was stealing things from Walmart (not because he has been deprived but because he wanted it when we said he didn't need it), this went on for months and yes he got spanked and shown the parish jail to scare him straight to stop it! I don't feel that children are bad by nature, and I don't feel the ones that don't get spanked will be criminals but until our children are adults we have the responsibility to attempt to change their bad behavior so that they make responsible law abiding adults.
2006-09-21 12:00:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's interesting that you bring this up...
Last year there was a special on the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation's program "The Nature of Things with David Suzuki" that dealt with a question similar to the one you just asked.
To make a long story short, small children are naturally inclined to be violent.
Children at play commit what we call (as adults) assaults on each other. It was documented on video.
Basically, it's caused by their inability to respond to various situations without their base emotions.
Would I spank a kid...?
Not likely.
2006-09-21 05:30:23 · answer #3 · answered by Solidus 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What has crime and punishment - offence and police and courts and corrections got to do with the favour of physical punishment on normal everyday people, that go to work, do not associate with criminal elements, love their children to death, involved in their education and sporting activities, their to comfort them when they are sick, there to tell them they love them every night after reading a book before they go to sleep, their for them for total holistic purposes ,can you throw this crap.
There is nothing wrong with giving a child a clip on the bum, to discipline them.
Our role as parents is not control but nurture, we are only their caretakers till they fly to their own nest.
You mention the criminal element, and yes you are right
I have read hundreds of transcripts of offenders incarcerated for murder, assault occasioning bodily harm of their children, step children and the brutality is sickening. I might also add alot of these are from marriage break ups and access issues. 80% percent of the time is as a result of being under the influence of either grog or whizzer (speed, ice ). Never met one that has done it when they were straight.
Kiddytamperers are a different kettle of fish. No substance abuse.
I hope you do not mind me adding this to the physical abuse issue.
I have interviewed thousands of offenders who were beaten as children, raped as children, raised by alcoholics and junkies, been in foster care, started committing crimes when they were 8 year old and by the time the come into the adult system, they have knocked up a 15 page crim history usually the result of polysubstance abuse and have spent time in juvenile detention.
I also have friends that had horrible lives at the hands of their parents and they did not go on the wrong track. They moved on to better themselves, but regardless of what their parents did to them, they still loved them. Sad hey?
Reward and Punishment
DISCIPLINE means to teach. COMPLIMENTS is to encourage when there is positive behaviour, school work achievements , work around the house without prompting etc. Works both ways.
Your not the Super Ninny are you?
2006-09-21 05:49:52 · answer #4 · answered by kanga 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The truth is that we are all bad by nature to some degree. That's why so many people are searching for answers in religion. The Christian faith teaches us that if we accept Jesus as our Lord and saviour that we will put on a new nature and become new.
Old things are passed away. It doesn't make you perfect in one giant step but it does change who you are and helps you become a better person. Good parents lovingly correct their children, they do not physically harm them or break their ego.
2006-09-21 05:29:15 · answer #5 · answered by yourdayscoming 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Children are born good but the problem is in their parents. It's in the way they discipline them.
2006-09-21 05:17:42 · answer #6 · answered by einsteinette 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Children are absolutely not bad by nature!
2006-09-21 05:15:20 · answer #7 · answered by sheila 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some are...
2006-09-21 05:09:30 · answer #8 · answered by cadee884 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes but not all
2006-09-21 05:14:46 · answer #9 · answered by black mushroom 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋