I'm 16 years old and a junior in highschool. while i have been in highschool we have had dance n stuff but i have always be afraid to go...when my friends ask me to do things with them i always tell them no because i have been to scared to be with other ppl they are around.......this friday there is a big football game i was asked to go with some of my friends, they know some ppl that they are going to meet up with n i do not kno them b/c i have always been to afraid to meet them.... i am having major anxiety about going ...i am a very insecure person with my looks n the way i say things..i just want to be able to be a regular teenager.....someone pplz give me some advice!!!
2006-09-20 14:39:17 · 14 answers · asked by cheergrl08 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
the weird thing is that i am fine at school......i go to an all girl school which i really don't think helps with my problem and i am a cheerleader....i do not get freaked out infornt of crowds when i am cheering just more on a person level.
2006-09-20 15:02:51 · update #1
you remind me so much of my son:) he hates going anyplace new where there will be people he doesn't know or where his friends will be join up with people he doesn't know. Just this year he has been trying really hard to do just a few small things with his friends and it has made a big difference. maybe starting out a a big football game is a bit much.
try starting out by going someplace smaller with your friends like the movies and connecting up with only 1 or 2 of thier friends that you don't know. that way it will be in smaller steps. after you feel comfortable with thoose steps try something bigger like a regular football game or a dance.
don't worry many kids feel very insecure about how they look and what they say...they just odn't tell anyone about it.
Mom of 4 kids(ages 14,13,11,and 5)and on kid sis 11 years younger so I remember her teenager years very well too:)
2006-09-20 14:54:33 · answer #1 · answered by no 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am kinda the same way. I have this thing where I am afraid to see people I know out in public... I have no idea why. I also have turned down social events because I was scared to go, but I always just told myself it was because I just didn't want to go. I find that the best thing to do is just go out and have fun. Don't worry about what you look like or anything like that. It will be hard at first, but soon you will come to realize that going out and having fun with your friends is a whole lot better than doing anything else. It'll be tough, but I think you can do it. Good luck!!
2006-09-20 15:04:34 · answer #2 · answered by blue_church_mouse 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are beautiful! You've answered your own question in a marvelous manner. YOU DoN"T GET NeRVOUS WHEN YOU ARE CHEERLEADING.
Look at social encounters as cheerleading. Cheerleaders focus on the crowd, not themselves. Talk to the guy with a zit on the end of the nose. Notice the shy girl in the corner. I've practise a lot and can now get through a whole evening w/o mentioning myself once. Rah Rah - oh, by the way, cheerleaders are immensely popular. There are so few of them in life/school.
2006-09-20 15:54:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm pretty sure there is nothing wrong with you, I used to feel the same way when I was younger.....but alot of teens go through your situation. I would suggest learning how to love yourself more and try telling yourself over and over "there is nothing wrong with ME, I love myself!!" I know it sounds kinda weird, but the more you say it to yourself the more you will realize that you are a good person, and it will help you to build up some confidence.Most teens are very judgmental and can be really mean at times....just try not to listen to them, you are a good person I am sure and don't deserve to sit at home all the time worried about what everyone is thinking. This that you are going through is normal teenage stuff, and people that make fun of you, deep down, are just jealous they are not more like you. They are just severely insecure with their own selves and make fun of people better than themselves. Next time someone does this ignore them, or just smile your best smile at them.....be better than they are! And don't go down to their level. Hope this helps you! hugz!
2006-09-20 15:00:21 · answer #4 · answered by bobbie21brady 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's ok to be nervous about that. I know exactly what you're going through. I am the EXACT same way. I am the insecure study stay at home type. My best friend is a very outgoing secure person who, like your friends, have invited to hang out with people i don't know. But my best friend also taught me a very valuable lesson and that is, you're days are numbered and you should branch out and live your life to the fullest. Yes, it's kinda wierd and uncomfortable at first because you're stepping out of your comfort zone but once you do, you won't regret it. This year that's what I'm working on doing. So take a chance and go to this dance and hang out with some people you don't know. You'll never know them or get to know them unless you try. Just be yourself and they'll like you for you. But most importantly just know that nothing is wrong with you and there are plenty of other people out there who are just like you.
2006-09-20 14:48:21 · answer #5 · answered by lylitalianbeauty 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are normal :-) You are just nervous because you need some more experience, so for a while try saying yes to all the social events you get invited to. And remember, even if you make a social faux pas/say something someone doesn't like, whatever, people care more about how you react to it (ideally with humor and grace, not like it's a big deal) than what actually happened. Everyone gets anxious about these things at times, they just try hard not to show it. So go and have lots of fun!
2006-09-20 14:45:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anne R 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i was once like that dude!! i didnt like attending anything my friend's were excited about!i was always a loner!Soon that will pass over.What's so inaffectionate about a person is the unwillingness to do thing's there friend's have invited them to do.Just go out and have fun that's all they want.Dont hold back you will soon realize how much fun you would have missed on if you werent there.Its a football game it's not about people starring at you being the laughing stock of how many people?Im sure there's other people there that gonna look half as inaffectionate.You aint the only one in this world who think's so stupid of himself.Take care !! and embrace :D
2006-09-20 15:06:19 · answer #7 · answered by Lovemykids 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seeing a doctor can get you some medicine if you would rather now, just take it slow meet people in a easy going senario, only meet one person at a time, i find meeting someone over the internet helps because they dont judge you, then after you feel comfortable meet them in person.
2006-09-20 15:56:39 · answer #8 · answered by kylexx4xxever 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am 16 & a junior too in the same situation. The difference is that I let my friends know my opinion and that I am myself. They laught and find it funny only because they grew up together and are afraid to be different, but i've learned to stand bold, even if you have to stand alone. So be yourself, if you're shy like me be shy, if you're out going be outgoing, no matter what just be you. (it'll also help you get more girls, : ) )
2006-09-20 14:50:22 · answer #9 · answered by mack9930317 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you sound a very celver girl to me, listen to your gut it is telling you not to go, you do not feel right because the situation is not right. we are all different,and all go through some kind of insecurity, you have not got a problem. because you are not ready to go out and be with people you know do not feel right. look at your self girl you are beautiful and a lot wiser than your friends,take care and stay wise
2006-09-20 15:02:59 · answer #10 · answered by kate 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋