I feel that looks shouldn't matter. I mean yes to a point. I am not attracted to a man that has no teeth and a wart on his nose. I admitt their has to be a physical attraction. But as far as looks go i'm not reallllly picky. I just find that people are out for looks first then love. Peaple forget to look on the inside. I have seen this happen many times and also it has happend to me in the past.
2006-09-20 13:05:12 · 22 answers · asked by Tammy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
then u get disgusted feeling after a while
2006-09-20 13:08:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys are visual creatures.... and physical creatures. The problem is that .... YOU are different than US. So while you may think we are backwards...we AREN'T. And neither are you. Men and women are wired differently. Trying to say that what he do is wrong... is no different than telling us that sports are stupid. We laugh at the idea.
Bottom line is this. If you want someone that doesn't care about looks...find someone that hasn't cared about his looks. The odds are..he wont be as picky either. BUT if you are holding out, and trying to find a good looking guy...while you haven't been putting the most into your looks... wow... what a hypocrite (I'm not saying you are.... i'm saying this for everyone). I've seen this far too often. In what world does it make sense that a person that takes the time to be physically fit and healthy would find someone that is NOT interested in those things attractive? I mean..aren't relationships built on common interests? Especially a chosen lifestyle? I mean.... it's not exactly common to see a large person dating a very skinny person. That's why they can get on to shows like Maury!
You mentioned that people dont take into account the inside of a person?
This is my take on it. There are 4 real scenarios that can play out when you are attracted to someone.
1. You are attracted to someone on the inside = good friend / best friend
2. You are attracted to someone on the outside = one night stand or a booty call on occasion
3. You are attracted to both the inner qualities and their physical features = potential life long mate or spouse.
4. You aren't attracted to anything about them. Typically...they dont make it past the acquaintance level. I wouldn't suggest anything other than a distant "hello" on occasion.
Good luck. Hope this helped shed some light
2006-09-20 20:40:44 · answer #2 · answered by the_thoughtless_ponderer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People are all different. There are the ones for whom everything happens in the visual world. They live in visual perception and visual lives. They almost don't understand if you do not talk in visual terms with them. For them it matters.
Then there are people who are "digital" and into numbers and science and those kind of things. They understand life from the thinking and analytic perspective.
And then - there are the "kinestaetic" people who live and understand a physical life.
Often those types do not even overlap a lot. There is a whole psychiatric system (NLP) built around this theory which proved itself often as working and applicable.
So - back to your question: Not for everybody looks matter the same way. For some people however it is the world and they can not communicate or live differently.
So it does not help to say "looks should not matter" - for them it does. And nothing else does.
You will notice often those people are also involved in professions where they deal with visual aspects (from arts to fashion).
So - it may be interesting for you to read a book about NLP and then find out to which perception type you belong. And then - you should try to hook up with people from that type. You'll make the experience probably that they are not so much into looks.
2006-09-20 20:13:54 · answer #3 · answered by spaceskating_girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People - Don't love her/him for her/his beauty, she's/he's beautiful because you love her/him.
People are just getting too shallow these days. Yeah, surgery makes it real easy. But nothing can beat the real thing. And people should perhaps care more for how someone else FEELS to be around, to touch, instead of thinking how hot they look. Since NO ONE come with a guarantee "I will be hot forever".
As men complain that women blote after marriage etc. Then they have entered the relationship for wrong reasons. Looks shouldn't matter at all. Even the ugliest can become pretty by what you feel for them.
Think of Beauty and the beast.
2006-09-20 20:19:05 · answer #4 · answered by Magnuna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem is when you start dating someone you don't see their "inside" right away. Someone could come across extremely nice and then two week to two months down the road turn out to be a backstabbing butt-head! People first select by what they are attracted to. If you cannot stand the sight of someone, then obviously they are not meant to be your mate! After this is done, you play the "dating game" and find out if their personality then matches what you are looking for.
2006-09-20 20:12:17 · answer #5 · answered by indycraving 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is actually biological...for the survival of the species...that is the way it works. it is only our rational thought process that tells us to look at qualities other than looks...in some places it isn`t looks but money and power....there are many studies done that show a rich well dressed guy will get alot more reactions from the opposite sex than when the same guy looks average and not wealthy...so trying to find inner beauty takes time and committment...people hop into bed so quickly that they never take the time to find out what a person`s character is.
2006-09-20 20:11:59 · answer #6 · answered by Therapist King 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People are shallow that's why, if its not cute or pretty then they don't want it and that's too bad. I'm average, at least I think so, but to someone else I may be butt ugly don't know why, it's just the way of the world. I look for the good in people first ,then see what they truly look like,you know beauty is in the eye of the beholder,I would rather have someone that can see me for me than look right through me.
2006-09-20 20:23:24 · answer #7 · answered by datsbigdaddy2u 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looks are what the human mind sees before really knowing a person. it takes only .15 seconds to determine if a person is attractive or not. People (of all ages and genders) are naturally more attracted to attractive people. But when you get deeper into love or like, all that doesn't matter.
2006-09-20 20:10:21 · answer #8 · answered by LayLay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree, its whats on the inside that matters.thats why desieses r so high up, because everyone wants to have imediate attraction and have sex so fast,and then dump u.lol. thats a shame.my dude dont have to be fine as wine,but he do have to have a heart of Gold. good luck with finding mr. soul mate, im looking also.
2006-09-20 20:19:20 · answer #9 · answered by msbossy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The 1st thing that you will see in the person is the physical aspects.
The people that you're talking about don't have the time to get to know the person. For short these are shallow peeps.
2006-09-20 20:08:43 · answer #10 · answered by sharkie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because nobody wants to be with a ugly person....beauty is only skin deep but ugly is to the bone..me, I prefer a cute chick..not too flashy and made up...just natural and down to Earth...more India Arie than Beyonce.
2006-09-20 20:12:12 · answer #11 · answered by D.E.O.N. Sphinxxx 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋