It is sad that too many parents choose this lazy way of parenting. I wish people would change their minds about spanking (smacking) and find better alternatives. Some children remember spanking messages more than nurturing ones. They will remember and be most influenced by the 1 hit than the 100 hugs. Hitting just devalues a child. Children need to predict the outcome in order to behave good in the future. Parents should never spank because using fear and pain is the wrong way to go about it.
Spanking is a form of violence that teaches children that inflicting fear and pain on others is a way to control their behavior. Parents who spank are out of control and are not disciplined parents. It just teaches children how to hit, how to be sneaky, how to fear, how to be ashamed and how to take anger out on others. All degrees of spanking- light, moderate, occasional, rarely, always- give children the wrong kind of attention. You want your child to follow rules because they are right and good, not to avoid punishment because they are scared and become sneaky. When parents spank, they stop their children at the lowest level of moral development. So all the idiots that recommend to spank are eroding their childs ability to be empathetic. When you react with anger to childrens' behavior, we teach them to act without considering another persons' feelings-another consequence we need to avoid. Then when your child doesn't have empathy, it is impossible for them to learn to share, play well with others, avoid angry and violent actions, and take responsibility for their actions. I have children and am studying early childhood development in college. I hope that percentage lowers as people get educated about the harmful long term effects.
2006-09-20 13:21:50
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answer #1
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answered by Anonymous
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I'm 18 and I think i've turned out well enough I attend Marquette University I've always been a rather reserved child but on occasion like any kid i got little bratty. I was only spanked once in my life. It was because I wanted a candy bar in Target and continued the argument into the car and then actually grabed the steering wheel while my father was driving and turned it as hard as i could. I was old enough to know not to grab the steering wheel but young enough to not really relize what it could have done. We swirved and my dad pulled over and spanked me. Personally I will always remember that and personally i think i deserved it.
I really think spanking like any form of punishment is to make a child understand they have done wrong. Time outs are well and good, but ... everyone here has been a kid when my parents put me in time out i was off dreaming about dragons and magic and thinking of the last good movie i saw. If i was sent to my room I read. What is a parent going to say "oh hey please stop reading your being punished." (if I wasn't being punished I was reading anyway only it was outside)
Any type of punishment should fit the crime and no punishment will be liked. To be perfecty honest for me my spanking was a oh wow I really shouldn't do this dad got mad, the car swirved. Time outs were like a wow this is kinda pointless experience.
People who down right say you need to comunicate with your children, spanking is abuse. Well i don't think they veiw it right. Your not just wailing on you kid, thats not good, neither is excessive yelling or taking away priviliges to the point of they have nothing. Any punishment can be taken to an extreme.
My cousin who was spanked is, well a 4.0 honor student, one of my other cousins who was not spanked is also a 4.0 honor student. You need to do what is best for your child. But I also think that children are children and that parents guide them. Children should not disrespect others people or parents.
2006-09-20 20:23:45
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answer #2
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answered by FireKittenofdoom 3
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somewhat of those options try others. I actual have a 4 twelve months previous and somewhat of spanking we do day out (would desire to be grounded from something if older). the different decision is regularly chores. If my toddler refuses to do the chores then the two may well be carried out. If nonetheless refuses then I upload extra chores. each and all the chores could be completed formerly my toddler can play with friends, watch television, play video games or something they chosen to do for exciting. at some point my toddler had 12 chores.(verify you're making the chores age ideal)
2016-10-01 04:50:47
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answer #3
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answered by ? 4
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I rarely smack my kids .
I find if i do its because I myself have had enough .
On a different day I would not take the same approach.
Sometimes you can ask a child , and be ignored too many times .
It's not their fault .
but if I do smack them , Im guilty all day
2006-09-20 12:54:31
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answer #4
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answered by kevin d 4
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I hope you mean spank? I spank my children, when they're little, like 2-5, and only for open defiance or danger. There are some things that simply are not okay to do, and doing them again is not an option. Say trying to open the oven door or doing what you just told them not to. I think if you explain it, spank and make a big deal when they're little, you don't have to do it as much later, when they're older. Also, when they're little they don't reason, and they don't have many priveleges.
2006-09-20 12:42:16
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answer #5
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answered by steelypen 5
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i think theres a difference in a smack on the bottom and beating a child. i dont believe in losing your temper and going crazy on the little one, like with a belt or something. but as a child, i was spanked, and i have always been respectful to my parents and other adults. i will probobly spank my daughter (shes only 3 months now, but when shes old enough), but only if its something that cannot be resolved with timeout.
i have seen some bad misbehaving kids in the store and such, and when they dont listen to their parents and are screaming or something, i think they need a spanking. when it gets to the point where you cant keep your child in control with timeout or such, i think spanking is needed, but like i said, not going crazy on the little one!
2006-09-20 12:45:16
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answer #6
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answered by Anonymous
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Well children might not like time out or being grounded but if you smack them they really wont like it because it hurts I think if a parent can control their temper and not smack too hard then its perfectly fine to discipline that way
2006-09-20 12:37:33
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answer #7
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answered by awesome_chick2009 2
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i never raise my hand to my child , they can tell i'm ticked by the look on my face. I was never Smacked or Spanked as a child , an i would NEVER do that to mine.
2006-09-20 13:24:28
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answer #8
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answered by lilredhead 6
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My son gets a pop on the butt if he is doing something dangerous, like trying to run out in the road or grab something sharp out of the dishwasher. He gets time outs for other things.
2006-09-20 12:35:23
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answer #9
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answered by Ryan's mom 7
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If it's not overused, it's a great way to get their attention and show them you mean business.
I won't ever forget the only time my mom spanked me. I was 6 and ran off to a friends house without asking. She was worried sick. I learned my lesson and never did that again!
2006-09-20 12:47:04
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answer #10
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answered by sammie 4
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