My boyfriend of 3 1/2 years said I love you for the first time recently. I moved in with him a little over a month ago and things have been a little rocky here and there. Everyone thinks hes an ****** cuz he NEVER talks about how he feels and hes cheated on me in the past (couldnt really hold it against him since I cheated too-he suspected but doesnt really know). But that has cleared up on both sides since Ive made the move in with him. I think hes been hurt by loved ones before and needs assurance Im not leaving when things get tough. I think he tests me once in a while so is he just afraid and cant talk about how he feels for fear of showing weakness? I love him alot and hoped but never expected him to say those 3 words. When his sister found out he said them she said "OMG, he's NEVER said that to anyone except his kids mom and they were together 5 years before he told her during the birth of his child! And that was 10 yrs ago!" Is it a cover for something or does he really mean it?
2006-09-20 12:10:46 · 8 answers · asked by DV 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
2006-09-20 12:13:38
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answer #1
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answered by Anonymous
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It seems your BF may have some emotional baggage to deal with. One reason can be that because your relations have been rocky lately - he fears you will leave, so to say ILY - makes him feel he can keep you. Or maybe he just loves you and wanted to wait untiil he felt comfortable enough to let you know. Have you told him ILY before? But, if he has a challenge with talking about his feelings - this may just be a prelude of other things to come. Imagine life with him 5 years from now and he still isn't confiding his thoughts and feelings to you ... how will you feel about that? What if he only says ILY once every 3 1/2 years? Can you live like that? Although you have strong feelings for him now - it can get old after a while. A woman wants to be communicated with ...
2006-09-20 12:18:38 · answer #2 · answered by tinthelbc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From the looks of things, it means that he really meant it. But only you can know. You guys have gone through a lot and making a big step. He might finally realize his feelings and wants to express them to you. The good thing you did, was to let him do it when he was ready. Just take it for what it is and role with it. If you have any doubts, then be careful.
2006-09-20 12:14:41 · answer #3 · answered by ConfusedK 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to understand that males don't show and express thier feelings as freely like females so it would be alot mor difficult for them to do so. since he's been hurt by love before you have to deal with whatever that last girl done did to him and thus making things hard for you because he didn't open up like that but still maybe it was worth the wait because so many youngters these days just say i love u when they don't even know what it really means. so for him to wait till he was sure should set an example to so of these youngters that should do that so your man girl did what he could but in the end girl he does love you and you have to believe that as well for it to be really true.
2006-09-20 12:27:37 · answer #4 · answered by blazz872000 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he probably really means it. Some people are not verbally expressive, and you shouldn't really hold it against him. It's not uncommon for couples to fight when they move in together, it's kinda like testing the waters, and defining your new territory. Boundaries get re-established. Good luck to you both.
2006-09-20 12:15:57 · answer #5 · answered by Sandy Ego 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You answered it, it was because he did not want to get hurt by being committed, that is propbably why he cheated on you because he was getting to close and got scared. Good luck in your relationship.
2006-09-20 12:14:42 · answer #6 · answered by YAHOO SUCKS ASS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are making way too much out of somehting you probably never will figure out.
2006-09-20 12:14:17 · answer #7 · answered by drsteve362005 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Atleast it wasn't "I hate you". He loves you odviously he's w/ you. Don't trip potato chip.
2006-09-20 12:23:12 · answer #8 · answered by g f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋