She's always so mean to me and she yells at me and calls me cuss words constantly. We were just arguing because she promised me a $120 cell phone for my 14th birthday in 2 weeks, now she changed her mind like she always does when she promises me things so I kept bugging her and asking her why did she change her mind. Then she called me a ***** and told me to shut the **** up, then I kept aking her why and she said because if she doesn't have a cell phone what makes me think that she'll get me one. Then I said because I walk home from school by myself. Then I said that if she didn't spend her money at bingo every week then she would have enough money for one. Then she called me a ***** and told me to shut the **** up again. Then my brother started teasing me and messing with me. And I get so tired of her calling me out of my name and yelling at me and telling me to shut up. Why does she hate me so much?
2006-09-20 10:33:53 · 7 answers · asked by bbnicole104 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i know she might seem like she hates you, but she's probably stressed over money problems or something. you said that your mom doens't have a cell phone, so maybe she feels that she can't really measure up to your standards as a mom. (omg. that sounded so dumb.) i mean, like giving you what you want rather than what you need. if you help her around the house or something, maybe you can prove to her that you DESERVE one.
hopefully, she's just pms-ing or something. has she always been like this? email me if you ever want to talk.
2006-09-20 10:47:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think she hates you. She may just be having a hard time. Forget about the cell phone, and when you can work to get one. I think it's unfair that she said she'd get you one and then "changed her mind" that's not right. I would never do that to my son. I agree with you. My boy is 8 and I will not let him walk home from school alone unless he had a phone. He doesn't and probably won't any time soon so I walk myself there to pick him up. Maybe you could try talking to her. Explain to her your feelings, this runs much deeper than a phone I think. It sounds to me that you are hurt becuase of the way she treats you. Let her know. What she does with that info is up to her. She might never change and that's her problem. I'm sorry that you are having these troubles. I'd just talk to her, or at least try. At first she may be a bit defensive. Try saying "I feel like...." Always start out with "I" statements, it sounds less threatening. The last thing you want is her to think you are being accusing. Be honest and kind that way if she blows it you can know in your heart that she tried. I sincerly hope things get better. When I was little my mother beat me daily and didn't feed me, my brother got EVERYTHING. I was adopted and they never let me forget it. So I kind of understand what you are feeling and I'm sorry for you.
2006-09-20 10:56:27 · answer #2 · answered by musicpanther67 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your mom needs to hear the words I Love You from you and maybe you should just go up to her and just tell her that you love her and give her the biggest hug you can. Try not asking her for things and maybe she will come around with the cell phone for you. And try complimenting her on things that she does.
2006-09-20 10:48:08 · answer #3 · answered by Katie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I could help with your question, but I can't. Sounds like your mom needs some down time. Please try to be patient with her and reason with her. Maybe sue just needs a hug. Go tell her you love her and share a hug. Maybe your phone will come in time or your mom just can't afford one right now. Remember your little brother is always going to tease his sister.
2006-09-20 10:43:14 · answer #4 · answered by stephenl1950 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow!!!
Sounds like your mother has some serious issues. Please pray for her. You seem to be a very respectful young lady you're not lowering your self to her level by cursing back. Be very proud of yourself.
Perhaps you should focus on how you can do something kind for your mother and demonstrate to her how you're able to keep your promise to her should she need anything (with in reason).. Kill her with consistent kindness. She loves you, but has a very poor way of relating to you. Rise above her bad behavior and continue to be respectful, kind and loving.
Don't allow your mothers issues to become your issues. You are not like her... you have your own goals, dreams, and choices to make in life. No matter what name anyone calls you (other than your real name) don't allow it to get you down... you obviously know if anyone calls you something negative that it's not true... so just keep in mind people who express themselves that way unfortunately have some issues that are negative, and worse they are unable to really communicate in a productive manner.
Try not to expect too much from her (until your mothers heart is changed) in the way of material things. Try not to expect her to be too kind, loving and trustworthy about her promises until her heart is changed. You just keep working toward improving yourself, finishing your education, and improving your character. One day you'll be a strong leader...
Try doing something nice for her at least once a week. It doesn't have to be anything huge however, don't look for her to give you anything in return... Just continue being nice. Write her a little note every now and then before you leave the house letting her know you hope she has a nice day, or thanking her for making dinner, or washing your clothes or something like that.
The old saying is... Love is won by giving Love... or basically you can catch more flies with honey than with vinagar.
Then one day when she's really in a good mood and you see an opportunity to talk to her (without your brother being around), let her know you really love her and you thank the Lord you have a mother but... "it really hurts you deeply when she calls you out your name and curses at you". Also, let her know that "you care about her... and you don't want to do anything that displeases her.. and would she please try to understand that it really crushes you emotionally to be spoken to in that manner".
Make sure you pray and ask God to guide your discussion/conversation and your attitude with her prior to speaking with her. Prayer really changes things... TRUST!
As for your brother.....even though it's quite typical for brothers to tease their sisters... It seems he has very poor timing and has to be ignored until he cries for you to pay attention to him. So the best cure for your annoying brother is to pretend (especially when he's tripping out) he doesn't exist. They usually can't stand that.
Hope all the best for you. Continue being the wonderful person you are.
2006-09-20 11:03:22 · answer #5 · answered by 247 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not that she hates you...My mom does the same thing though I'm almost 15...Her mom probably did the same thing to her and she doesn't know how else to handel it. Ask her to get you a pre-paid cell phone.
2006-09-20 10:42:44 · answer #6 · answered by Skylar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she don't hate you ,may be if you would stop putting the guilt trip on her about walking home from school and on and on and on ,Granted if she told you yes she would get you a phone she should but then again maybe you should try to earn that phone
2006-09-20 10:55:04 · answer #7 · answered by just_me_1955 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋