can anyone tell me what they think of this poem?

Question

here it is:
I stand at the edge
Looking down at the swirling black mist
A whole torrent
A flood
Held back by a single leaf
I hold back
thinking of what there is to live for
I have nothing
My mind is blank
So I give
I give in
I give up
And I jump
Into the writhing lake
And slowly sink to the bottom

i DO NOT want to kill myself! thanks to all the positive people

what about htis poem?
I wish said the little girl
So pure of heart
I wish said the little boy
So pure of mind
The wish of a child with no wrong at heart
No bad intentions
Should always come true
But the world doesn’t work that way

I wish… For my mom to come back
I wish… for my dad to be nice again
These wishes are from the innocent
They should be granted
For the sake of the child
But they almost never are
The world ignores even those
Innocent pure good intentioned and hurt
The world is just like that

I wish my brother wasn’t dying
I wish my sister hadn’t run away
Selfless beautiful fragile things
A little child crying, wishing
Believing in the stars
But the stars just glitter coldly
They don’t care
Even about the small scared children
The world is unfair that way

I wish I had a home
I wish I could make a difference
These are the wishes of a child
A child is a miracle
Small yes
but big on the inside
the world should do something to thank these small wonders
but it doesn’t
it just leaves them to wish
and cry and be happy with what little they have
the world is cruel that way

Answer 1

It's alright...it sounds...desperately like you're trying to sound deep and that you took the cheap road to do that...suicide; When, in fact, suicide is not deep at all, it's the giving up and week thing to do...I think that if someone really wanted to affect a human being they should write a poem that truly means something...not this mindless babbling that people seem to buy into so often.
As far as the actual writing goes...it's good I just think that you need to apply yourself...what makes a good poet is what he writes about.

Answer 2

I really like it. People can't appreciate poetry if they automatically assume that they're going to kill themselves. Keep it up. I liked it alot. Some of my poetry is free verse and a little depressing, but there's still beauty in it.

Answer 3

Well this poem sounds like you want to kill yourself by drowning. Or you are stuck in a rut and don't know how to get out. Good poem.

Answer 4

Not so good and it's kinda depressing maybe you need to see a theripist♥

Answer 5

umm....very depressing. if this is your own work....talk to someone. life is not this depressing.

Answer 6

Please get some professional help ASAP.
This is a serious condition.