My boyfriend broke up with his ex one year ago and has been with me for 9 months now. He treats me perfect and expresses sincere regret for treating me poorly in the past. We had dated two years ago and he stood me up dumped me led me on etc for his ex. I love him and want to forget about the past, but I can't seem to let it go. I feel threatened by his ex who is no longer in the picture, but I feel like I'll never be as good as she was even though that makes no sense since he's with me now. How can I move past the bad memories and be happy now?
2006-09-20 09:15:29 · 11 answers · asked by Jessica 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A lot of people go through this at least once in their life. I
guess you can do one of two things. Either look at this as an experience that happened and you've learned from it.
Or, if it's bothering you so much that it's interfereing with your relationship, it may be best to back out for awhile so you can look at things from the "outside" in. A healthy relationship isn't about fears, insecurities, and doubt. You should feel good about this person, and secure with yourself and who "you" are. Good luck
2006-09-20 09:23:34 · answer #1 · answered by Republican!!! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wont tell you don't be happy but be happy mantaing your distance cause what so ever happens you can not full trust him evern now cause you know that he left you in the midle of a good relationship and you got hurt and the othert thing is that you don't want that to happen but about the part that you said she is better than you? you are to kind cause you are not suposed to think that way I know I am very sulfish but I allways say that I a the best in any thing cause I know that I am and I believe I can do any thing that I ant to do as well so there you will have to say that you are the best you are more than her in every way some times ou will have to also remmeber what had happend in the past cause well you have to be 100% sure befor you trust him at list that Is what I believe you shuld be doing not worry about it but don't forget it as well..
2006-09-20 16:22:27 · answer #2 · answered by abeshawiwe!! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have got to believe in yourself and love yourself. Tell yourself that u are a very important person and that u have lots to offer other people.It is hard to trust people once they have hurt us but ask yourself this ? "Do I want a life wtih this person?" Forgiving once is okay but if it happens again more than likely it isn't going to change. Accept that you both have a past, then let it go and live for today because today is all u really have. I hope things work out and if u truley want to be with this person it will work out. Good luck
2006-09-20 16:24:42 · answer #3 · answered by confused/hurt/angry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's possible that you just can't forget the past. Maybe you should break up with him and find someone else who hasn't mistreatd you. If you "can't seem to let go" I'd say you are still very hurt and angry over it.
If you truly want to be with him, then you need to simply stop induling yourself with this obsessive behavior. You can choose what to think about: you choose to think about "her." If you decide you'd rather think about her than anything else, end it and find someone you can wholeheartedly forgive.
2006-09-20 16:19:26 · answer #4 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just have more fun with him. being busy most of the time is the best way to forget the past. dont let the thaughts come back. when you see him caring about you and you have him by your side, you cant remember those memories.
2006-09-20 16:25:23 · answer #5 · answered by Sally 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he grew up and matured? If you agree with that, then try not to remember what happened. If you keep thinking about it then you'll eventually resent him and your relationship will end anyways!
2006-09-20 16:26:18 · answer #6 · answered by josiedickelman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First take it real slow with him,and most of all tell him how you are feeling, it will make you feel better getting this off your mind.
2006-09-20 16:19:20 · answer #7 · answered by reba i 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seek counseling. it will just get worse if you can't find a good healthy self-esteem. Your going to be causeing your self pain for no reason.
2006-09-20 16:20:10 · answer #8 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Check yourself esteem
2006-09-20 16:19:39 · answer #9 · answered by yahlaydeez 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
be positive and think about future. it will be bright. good luck.
2006-09-20 16:24:21 · answer #10 · answered by prince47 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋