My son has been in a wheelchair since he was little, and lately, he's had this obsession with marathons. He trains all the time, and he's pretty fast in that thing. He's made it as far as 18 miles at once, but I keep telling him a marathon is over 26 miles, and he'll never make it. I just don't want him to embarrass himself.
2006-09-20 06:56:53 · 31 answers · asked by Dialup, Avatar, Jones! 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
i dont think he understands that there are absolutely NO MARATHONS for people in wheel chairs...
if he's so obsessed with marathons, get him another hobby like making model airplanes...
if you knew he was going to be in a wheelchair, an abortion should have been brought up, thats for sure!
2006-09-21 04:48:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Omg, you told your son that he couldn't make it?!?
First of all, shame on you for putting him down and discouraging him from something that he truly wants to do!! As parents we are to encourage our children to reach their life long goals. How do we help our children attain their goal? By being supportive and encouraging. By becoming involved in their activities and being helpful.
Your son has made it 18 miles, now that is something to be spectacularly proud of. That's more than half way!!! Not that many wheelchair bound persons can do that. So instead of knocking him down, get out there and encourage him!! Support him!! Get out there and help him train. Get more information on marathons, special olympic marathons, hire a trainer, work out with him to build up upper arm strength...
If he fails, then your job is to pick him back up and tell him to try again. Try, Try, Try again.
I understand you're trying to protect him from disappointment and failure. But you're only doing more harm than good. It's healthy to feel disappointment and failure. Granted, it totally sucks in the moment, but that will just give him the fire to train harder to be successful the next time.
2006-09-20 07:39:07 · answer #2 · answered by my_lil_buttercups 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Encourage Him!!! What you see as an obsession is his passion. It's good to have goals and dreams. He doesn't see his wheelchair as an obstacle preventing him from training for athletic events. I am sure that he understand how far 26 miles is now that he is training. Don't worry about embarrassment, just love and encourage your son. He's a great role mode, be proud of him!!!
2006-09-20 07:14:02 · answer #3 · answered by LasVegasMomma 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Support him! Whether he wants to do ti or not, it doesn't concern you, and the fact that you are trying to convince him out of it probably just makes it that much more important to him that he proves you wrong. I think he should do it. Its not like he'll be first, but if he passes that finish line it'll be a great accomplishment for him. Let him know that he should train more, and be there helping him with that if you can. Keep track of how far he's gone at an indoor track, be proud of how much progress he's made. If he spends more time training he might have time to reconsider it. Think of it this way, at least your sons wanting to do something with his life, maybe make something more of himself. Encourage him!!
2006-09-20 10:12:31 · answer #4 · answered by Hannah 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wimpy, selfish, overprotective fool!!!!
You don't care whether he embarrass himself or not. This is about you. Do you prefer for him to stay in his wheelchair and enternally wallow on his condition?
You should be proud and happy that he is pushing himself out of his limits. And if you were a good father, you should encourage him to push himself.
That's what good parents do, teach their kids the strenght to go beyond the limits imposed by life. Stop being so selfish and over protective.
If you really care for him, let him be. Getting bruised and bumped is part of the learning process called life. You are not doing any favors to him by trying to talk him out.
This is why we live in a nation of undercompetent wimps without drive and ambition who give up at the first challenge they encounter.
I swear to God, I don't understand these people.
2006-09-20 07:08:38 · answer #5 · answered by elnyka 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you are the one who will be embarrassed. Be proud that he is training so hard for a goal. Encourage him as much as you can. Just attempting a marathon is an accomplishment in itself and something to be very proud of. You need to show him that you are proud of him and his effort. Would you rather he just languish with nothing to look forward to?
2006-09-20 07:05:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can understand your feelings about not wanting him to embarrass himself, but I do think that you should let him try. He sounds like he's got a strong will and a "want to" for life so chances are that even if he does not win, he won't be embarrassed anyway.
Look at it this way, he's not sitting at home pitying himself and hating everyone who can walk. Be grateful for that and let him know you love him and are proud of him no matter how well he competes.
Good luck to you and him!!
2006-09-20 07:39:32 · answer #7 · answered by loulou 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
=T....he is ur son. let him make his own mistakes. it is the ONLY way he will learn, for himself...how to handle situations, how to make good decisions. what if he doesn't make it? oh well, at least he will never regret it, and blame u for "not letting him". always encourage ur kids to seek Positive, Healthy, and Happy things..... if training like this makes him happy, and he loves doing it, do not discourage him! he is not hurting anyone, he is not using anyone, he is not selfish or naughty or unmotivated... u have to be able to encourage Healthy characteristics in ur child, even if u *think* the outcome (like losing the race) is "embarrasing. what's more important is building his character, letting him know that u are behind him No Matter What.
2006-09-20 07:06:15 · answer #8 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can'ty believe you would even THINK of telling him not to do it. Think if you were terry fox's mom! it IS possible... im only 16 and i can tell ya, no one's going to laugh at your son. You're the onyl one that would be embarrassed! seriously, tell him you know he can do it, and if he cant then say im glad you tried your best and help him out with the next year, thats definitely what a parent should do, to make him feel the best about himself and everythign else!
2006-09-20 10:11:15 · answer #9 · answered by Kat* 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Encourage him. So what if he doesn't win? He'll have tried, he'll have worked hard towards a goal, and I bet that he'll still feel very good about himself for getting there. And if he doesn't finish this one, he'll get further in the next one. And then he'll finish one, and then he'll come in in the top half of his class, and then... who knows?
Keep in mind that you miss 100% of the shots that you don't take.
2006-09-20 07:06:01 · answer #10 · answered by Ralfcoder 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋