my fiance has said he will not wear a tuxedo during our wedding ,i need help ,i don't what my wedding messed up
2006-09-20 06:47:25 · 42 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
he just doesn't what wear a penguin suit ,he would like to wear jeans & a shirt with his ball cap turned backwards & i don't like it at all ,i mean i'm going to be in this $1,000.00 dress & he thinks hes wearing jeans ,no way, its my wedding & i what it to be nice ,please help
2006-09-20 07:38:09 · update #1
are you kidding me?! I would just at the chance to waer a tuxedo! A tuxedo is on of the best looking things a man can wear... Ever!
all is not lost for you, sit him down and explain to him that it would mean alot to you if he would wear a tuxedo to your wedding, let him know that it would just be for the day and it would mean the world to you.
If he still refuses ask him if he would just consider going window shopping with you/ or you happen to **** by a tuxedo rental and drag him in there and tell him how good he would look i one of those on your wedding day/ ask him to come to the bridal store with you, most of those places also have tuxedos for rent talk him into at least trying one on. maybe he'll feel better about it.
you've no doubt already got a few copies of bridal magazines, point out some snazzy looking tuxedos to him and tell him how sexy you think it looks. play on his ego.
and besides that tux's are f'in pimp, have you ever seen a james bond movie where he didnt absolutley look smooth in a tuxedo. tuxedos look good on just about anyone!
just remember that relationships are all about compromise, give and take and meeting at the middle ground. good luck on your marriage and hope you have a long and fruitful relationship!
2006-09-20 07:03:53 · answer #1 · answered by bloody_trauma 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You made a mistake saying it's "my wedding", the wedding is for both of you not just you. You guys need to sit down and compromise. Obviously, jeans won't go with your wedding dress. But maybe it doesn't have to be a tuxedo, it could be a nice suit or something like that. Explain to him how much this means to you and see what he's willing to go for. It takes two to make this work and you guys are going to have to learn about compromise. Good luck!
2006-09-20 07:50:30 · answer #2 · answered by SweetPea 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why won't your fiance wear a tux? Why should he have to? If you aren't having a formal wedding, then have every member of the wedding party in suits. If it is a formal wedding, then you need to reconsider why you want this and he doesn't. This is a two way street and either your ideas of what a wedding is and what formal is are very different than his, or you are being too controlling and on the verge of being bridezilla.
Despite what the others have said, don't lure him or force him into it. Sex in exchange for formal wear is degrading to you and will end up being an issue later in your marriage. He may always resent having to wear the tuxedo and will always blame you for it and it will set a prescedent for you 'not being concerned with his feelings and being selfish'.
If he hates getting dressed up, is this something you are ok with? What happens when you attend formal functions and he insists on wearing jeans and boots?
2006-09-20 07:23:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Maybe you shouldnt marry this man. Explain that you will be in a very expensive FORMAL wedding gown and that he must be dressed formally as well. Go with him to the tux rental place and let him choose the tux. Some tuxs look more like suits which he may prefer. HE cant wear jeans and a tshirt because the rest of your family will consider him trashy and wonder why you are marrying a loser. My fiance wears jeans and t's all the time but understands he must dress up during occasions such as our wedding. He will wear whatever tux i pick out (as long as it is comfortable) and that is how it should be!
2006-09-20 08:05:09 · answer #4 · answered by Educated 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
They have very nice tuxes that look like suits with sport cuts and plain shirts and vests which are very comfortable. That's what my husband chose for our wedding.
Tell him he'll look like a fool in his jeans and ball cap turned backwards while everyone else is nicely dresssed. For certain wedding styles that is appropriate dress, but not if you're going to be all fancied up and going for a more formal wedding.
Good luck.
2006-09-20 08:54:02 · answer #5 · answered by parsonsel 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, what does he want to wear?? A suit?? a pair of jeans??
We kinda need to know how extreme he is being and what does he think he wants.... cause then we could work with that.
I would take him to the tuxedo store and have him look and try on some and see if there is anything that he likes. Also, if you have groomens what are they going to wear??? Also, the tux places have lots of different idea and looks so if he doesn't want a "bow tie" he could rent a nice vest and tie....
2006-09-20 06:51:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
There are alot of tuxedo styles that are less restrictive. They even have some that look like really relaxed suits.
Men are very visual, so I would get some men's fashion magazines with the styles that you would like for him to wear.
I don't think he will respond well to being forced into wearing a tuxedo. It is best to find a suit that that would match his personality and your wedding best.
Also remember that it is not just YOUR day it is HIS also.
Don't be a typical bitchy bride. He loves you and you are important to him.
Obviously.... because he asked you to marry him.
Good luck!
2006-09-20 14:03:09 · answer #7 · answered by goldenlifev 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take him out to a formal wear shop and show him the different styles... there are so many to choose from maybe you can make a compromise. If he has seen a HORRIBLE one in the past maybe he just thinks that is what they all look like.... is it the Tux or a suit in general? Maybe he just isn't into tails... is it necessary? Talk to him and figure out what it is that he doesn't like instead of insisting on him wearing one.
Short of altering your plans there isn't much you can to upon his refusal. Is it possible that you bargain with him, maybe he can change into ANYTHING he wants after the first few dances.... cringe as it might make you do... you may have to do a little compromising on your own.
Congrats and best of luck
2006-09-20 06:56:43 · answer #8 · answered by ♥ goddessofraine ♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him chose the tux to wear. My son chose one that had a longer jacket, buttoned up the front, small stand-up collar; no tie, cumberbund or vest. Just a shirt with with one special button showing.
VERY classy. Had ALOT of guys say they wouldn't mind wearing a "monkey suit" if they could wear that.
I looked for a picture to give you a link but haven't found one yet. If I do, I'll edit.
similar to the white ones only in a dark charcoal
http://www.suitaly.com/tools.aspx?id=132
2006-09-20 08:36:33 · answer #9 · answered by weddrev 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like time for a little ego-stroking... does he dress nicely (suit) for work? If so, that's a great time for compliments (and so forth); a beloved guy is great, a beloved guy in a sharp suit, shaved, with his hair combed, is positively yummy! Nagging doesn't work, bruising a guy's ego is a bad idea. (I've heard that people-training- both male and female- is a lot like animal training- reinforce and praise the good behavior and ignore the bad.)
I was lucky, my now-husband wanted to wear a tux and bowtie- and he looked smashing in it. We even kicked around the idea of kilts, but decided against it, for the sake of the groomsmen...
2006-09-20 09:49:43 · answer #10 · answered by Megan S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋