2006-09-20 06:18:30 · 9 answers · asked by honey27 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
as christians we decided to refrain, which is pretty hard. times when we found ourshelves having nothing to do, to stop idle mind wandering, we spend our pre-marriage time trashing out & coming to compromise of our individual expectations, goals, moral inclinations, issues on values, in-laws & child raising. most times the topics get pretty heated, so we not in the mood to be tempted.
we also set goals so tt we travel the same direction. most imptly we seek to understand how God want us to fit into his plan.
since then we being married for 12 yrs & growing strong, we both know tt this union is way it is at coz of those early years of homework. the sex might have drop off less coz of work & kids commitment, but that is not terribly adverse coz from the start the marriage was never hinged on that. that's the key secret.
2006-09-20 06:37:48 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes! I have been married for 23 years and it is still going strong.
Abstaining before marriage does work!
2006-09-20 14:21:21 · answer #2 · answered by Brigid O' Somebody 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I didnt refrain...I was born again after thefirst marriage.. former husband lost his hormones Otherwise we could have still been married but he was abusive too...i put up with alot of crap..it lasted 28 years on paper...but was bad the second half..
2006-09-20 13:22:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It has lasted 3 years and going strong.
2006-09-20 13:19:54 · answer #4 · answered by Sifu Shaun 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have only been married for 8 months, but it is amazing to me to see how the couples with which we are friends have feigned. I mean, there was literally more joy and celebration at the weddings where the couples refrained from sex before marriage. I mean, God blesses those who try to do His will. And the couples who refrained from sex before marriage are clearly happier over all even after the wedding day. Here's some stats if you are interested: Thanks for reading and God Bless!
Couples who engage in sex before marriage are far more likely to divorce. According to a study by the National Survey of Family Growth, women who have premarital sex increase their odds of divorce by about 60 percent. In a study on premarital sex and the risk of divorce, the Journal of Marriage and the Family reported that those women who had been sexually active prior to marriage faced "a considerably higher risk of marital disruption than women who were virgin brides." (Joan R. Kahn and Kathryn A. London, "Premarital Sex and the Risk of Divorce," Journal of Marriage and the Family, 53 (1991)
Statistically, the more sexually involved you are BEFORE marriage, the more likely you are to commit adultery AFTER marriage." (Andrew M. Greeley, Faithful Attraction: Discovering Intimacy, Love and Fidelity in American Marriage (New York: Tom Doherty Associates, 1991)
Couples who believe that you should "drive the car before you buy it" and live together before marriage are unlikely to marry. A Columbia University study found that "only 26 percent of women surveyed and a scant 19 percent of men" married the person they were living with. In addition to this, another study showed that even if they do marry, couples who begin their marriages through cohabitation are almost twice as likely to divorce within 10 years compared to all first marriages: 57 percent to 80 percent. Researchers from Yale University, Columbia University, and the Institute for Resource Development at Westinghouse, found that divorce is significantly more prevalent for couples who cohabit with their future spouses. They found that, on average, women who cohabit before marriage have a divorce rate that is 80 percent higher than the rates of those who do not. (Neil G. Bennett, Ann Klimas Blanc, and David E. Bloom, "Commitment and the Modern Union: Assessing the Link Between Premarital Cohabitation and Subsequent Marital Stability," American Sociological Review 53 (1988):127-138
A study conducted by the Family Violence Research Program at the University of New Hampshire found that, compared to married couples, the overall rates of violence for cohabiting couples was twice as high, and the overall rate for "severe" violence was nearly five times as high. (Kersti Yllo and Murray A. Straus, "Interpersonal Violence Among Married and Cohabiting Couples," Family Relations 30 (1981): p. 343.
Cohabitation, Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage in the United States.
Series Report 23, Number 22. 103pp. (PHS) 98-1998.
Download report at http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/series/sr_2...
Among the findings in this report: unmarried cohabitations overall are less
stable than marriages. The probability of a first marriage ending in
separation or divorce within 5 years is 20 percent, but the probability of
a premarital cohabitation breaking up within 5 years is 49 percent. After
10 years, the probability of a first marriage ending is 33 percent,
compared with 62 percent for cohabitations.
2006-09-20 13:24:34 · answer #5 · answered by Mary's Daughter 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Been happily married for 29 years. Yes .We did what normal adults do. We had plenty of sex before we married.
2006-09-20 13:31:04 · answer #6 · answered by theagitator@sbcglobal.net 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
all my relatives... most of them didn't have divorced,, knowing that marriage is not only for sex,,, sex is one important thing in it,,, but not everything,, my father married my mother 35 years ago and he didn't touch her before that,,,
same for all my uncles ( 6 uncles ) and my ants ( 8 ),, one only got divorced,,, and it wasn't for sex it was for misunderstanding on rising their kids,,,
that's all
2006-09-20 13:32:02 · answer #7 · answered by Truth Seeker 2 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My cousin was not a virgin when he married, but his wife was, and she had made him wait until they were married. They divorced after less than a year.
2006-09-20 13:32:47 · answer #8 · answered by Chickidee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Youll get two response. One will be lies.
If it has lasted, it is only because the sex life is inconsequential, or because one of the two are getting it elsewhere....
2006-09-20 13:24:40 · answer #9 · answered by YDoncha_Blowme 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋