I started talking to this guy a few months ago. I met him thru a friend of mine (they are related). We had been doing fine, although this is a long distance relationship, then he didn't call for a few days. When I finally caught up with him, I asked him why he was breaking up with me without telling me. I told him that if that is what is going on, just be honest with me. I hate mess. He assured me that that wasn't the case, but that some things had been going on that was taking a lot of his time and stressing him. We talked for a few days and while I our conversation wasn't long, it was still meaningful. He was still assuring me that he wasn't going anywhere, we were going to be together. I haven't heard from him in two weeks. I would have preferred him tell me the truth two weeks ago, because I hurt and am PISSED because I put hope in a liar. I had no reason to doubt him until recently. Any thoughts???
2006-09-20 05:19:34 · 32 answers · asked by jt-tex 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
To those who thought that I read too much into this, I didn't. I didn't ask for his feelings, he volunteered. When I doubted, he assured w/o end. I said from the beginning that I don't like mess. If there is a problem, let me know. If you don't want to be with me, let me know, it may hurt, but it's a lot easier to deal with as opposed to having someone lie and walk away as if you don't matter-and I know I don't to him. My calls to him have stopped, and yes my friend will know so she can understand my anger. We've been friends too long to end it over him. I do appreciate all of your comments.
2006-09-20 05:44:26 · update #1
He sounds like either 1) he has a ligitimate reason he has not contacted you like a family situation or something like that or 2) he is a coward and can't tell you he no longer wants to see you.
2006-09-20 05:22:55 · answer #1 · answered by Marie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me that you're reading much more into this relationship than there really is to it. It's only been a few months since you first started talking and you're already calling it a relationship. I'd call it a companionship at best. Relationships come from time well spent, and how much time can you two spend together while living apart. Stop wanting more than he can give and accept what he has to offer or move on. If it is upsetting you now it will only get worse later
2006-09-20 05:28:20 · answer #2 · answered by sleepingbeauty123 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best to move on and leave him behind, sweetie. You can waste *years* of your life trying to figure out why someone is the way they are or chooses things you don't understand. (Believe me, I've done it.) Life is precious and every day is a gift. Spend the time you would spend worrying living *your* life, growing as a person and finding the joy that you deserve. The person meant for you is out there. It's just not him. Two weeks with no word from him says all you need it to say. Moving on may not be easy, but it's what you will have wished you had done later if you spend any more time worrying about why he hasn't called.
2006-09-20 05:25:07 · answer #3 · answered by writerchick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I don't want to say this to hurt you but there is a chance that he could be cheating on you with out you knowing it, because he has found someone better and has not had a chance to tell you since his interests are obviously elsewhere. It could be he is not sure what he can tell you in fear that no matter what he says you won't believe him. If you think he is a liar then maybe the best thing you need to do is move on with your life and find someone that is not afraid to be honest with you. Maybe you are having a hard time believing thing you think could be happening and you refuse to believe, but that is not uncommon. It does not seem that he wants to be with you because he is gone half the time. Just move on and forget about him there are better guys out there you just have to find the right one that is best for you.
2006-09-20 05:29:08 · answer #4 · answered by gordonflames242003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well either you are not what he's looking for, or maybe there is something but he can't tell you, doesn't want to tell you because he thinks it will hurt you, or just doesn't have the guts to tell you to your face.
A lot of people have issues with confrontations. If you got in his face and demanded why he was walking away from you I suspect he told you what he needed to to get out of there and will never contact you again. Especially if he wasn't walking away from you, just concentrating on other things.
Let it go, he sounds young and/or ignorant about such things. Could just be a complete introvert or the relationship didn't mean the same to him as it obviously did to you. Either way, its over, time to move on.
Hope this helps,
-Rob
2006-09-20 05:26:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well guys tend to do things like that. Since you will run into him aventually you need to just let it go and pretend it never happened. Don't let your friend know how pissed or hurt you are cuz it will just get back to him.
Guys like that need someone to put them in there place. What can i say it's happened to me and it's a f****d up feeling.
He hasn't called yet.... but he will soon and you should not take his calls and if you see him say hi and act like it never happened. Guys sometimes do it to get a reaction and when they don't get one, that's when it hurts. Don't beat yourself up for this loser. Most likely he has someone else back home and that's why he stopped calling.
The best thing you can do is to get over it and not put to much into it. That's what he wants.
2006-09-20 05:31:26 · answer #6 · answered by dodgergirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
long distance relationships are HARD.... if u had no former connection with that person, its even harder. i dont suggest u continue it. dont trust them right away. He could be busy... is he in school? I have a long distant b.f and our convos are short 5 mins. every once in awhile but we undertand eachother... we on the same page.... don't get too attached too quickly... thats how people get hurt.... it seems like he dont care... or is going though a lot right now... dont call him. Let him call u... if he want to find u, he knows wher u are... thats what i suggest. if u dont hear fromhim in a week, assume it's over... move on... you deserve better.
if u can, date someone close by... its a lot easier
Being friends isnt really a bad thing either...........
2006-09-20 05:29:48 · answer #7 · answered by shaniB 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As crazy as it may sound, he may truly not want to break up with you. It could be that he has done something stupid (like cheating) and doesn't know how to face it OR it could be that he's dealing with something more personal and does not feel comfortable talking to you about it. Either way, you have a serious communications issue. I would definitely not sit by the phone and wait for his call.
2006-09-20 05:23:42 · answer #8 · answered by J L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
time to tell your friend to find you a new man! Some guys, well, al lot, dont think when it comes to having to call and let you know something is up. Mine guy will tell me he's on his way to my house, but an hour later he still hasnt showed up. I would call to find out where he is and he's making pit stops to the store and everywhere else! I ask, why havent you called to let me know you would be late??? His response: I wasnt thinking. But since its been 2 weeks...time to move on.
2006-09-20 05:27:25 · answer #9 · answered by Ash 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't blame you. When a girl gets ignored by a guy, that's grounds for a prison sentence. Maybe he's dumb and does not realize that females need a lot of attention.
or maybe, it could be something worse.
I say let him go and be thankful you only lost a couple of weeks of time instead of finding out 5 years later that he was a liar.
2006-09-20 05:23:19 · answer #10 · answered by Tones 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋