So I've been seeing this girl for 3 wks now and things are going great. We've been out 4-5 times and she seems really into it. But the problem is that she never contacts me first (phone, email, texts, etc?). Whenever I call her, she answers right away and we talk for about an hour, but she never calls me first. I'm just confused that she never makes the initial move? I don't want to expend myself and seem needy. But I like this girl a lot and don't want to mess it up? Do I just ignore her? Then I risk losing her? What's the best way to keep her interested? Could she be seeing other people and trying to feel me out? Is she playing games? I'm so damn confused.
2006-09-20 04:58:32 · 18 answers · asked by dom 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You have the right idea about trying not to look desperate. Girls generally want the guy to intiate the first move, whether its a phone call or a kiss.
It's good to ignore her a little though, it will keep her guessing, atleast until you have established an actual serious relationship, which will keep her interested.
Don't be too nice, by pulling out chairs, calling her right away, opening doors.. anything like that. The more confidane you act, the more preoccupied, important you act the more desirable you will be.
Next time you talk ask her out. Somewhere fun but not cheesy. No movies & dinner or anything that crappy. Try an amusement park or concert. Something that'll get her excited!
Oh & make sure you've got the cash because I girl who expects you to call her first will also expect you to pay!
Keep things light, exciting, fun & a little mysterious & you will be set! Trust me!! I'm a chick & I know what chicks want!!
Good Luck!!
2006-09-20 05:17:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
D~D~D I am in the same situlation Too mine did confide she had been out and even had her ex in the picture But wonder if The Doctors have told her to be independant as the 4or 5th week we had this discustion & it was maybe a 3 mth later she said her friend had her to lunch and met a guy but I did met here friend but I don't think that I am getting mention of. Any going on a 2 hr trip with 50 ppl and friends so how I make out and getting answers as we might be meeting for water fit classes soon and had perfrom walk fit in the past 3 mths so the 21 till next week will be the question!
P.S. she too will message me back with that nice bye symbol at the end and write even if she's doing bingo or in communication so?? we're at least friendly but the last two times ??? Lately Im'ing?
2006-09-20 05:24:45 · answer #2 · answered by David H 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She definitely isn't not interested and the nice girl types usually aren't into playing games. In my opinion, she is either interested or she isn't sure herself. She probably just can't decide what she wants and you'll have to be patient. Just keep meeting with her a couple times a week, even if it's just the gym. Then eventually it will just build and you can take it a step farther and meet for dinner or a movie, and see where it leads. Good luck! P.S. to the girls: I hate girls like this! I wish they would all just say what's on their mind and not screw with guys like this. It really hurts guys when they do this!
2016-03-26 23:05:08 · answer #3 · answered by Simonne 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was trained from birth to never open my own doors, never carry out the garbage, and never, ever contact a man first or seem needy.
She's probably dying, staring at the phone hoping you'll call or text her. But she'll play by the rules, and don't waste effort trying to change that.
To keep her interested, bring her small gifts, every time you see her. A peach or pear, a tiny box of chocolates, two bananas, a single chrysanthemum, a wee book about seashells, anything that costs maybe a dollar or three will do, or that was yours. You will distinguish yourself from anyone else who might catch her fancy, and she'll look forward to seeing you even if she's mad at you.
After you marry her, she MIGHT call you occasionally if you ask repeatedly and assure her that it's okay.
2006-09-20 05:07:06 · answer #4 · answered by nora22000 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it is possible that she is not exclusive with you only , she may feel the same feelings of not wanting to seem needy, or she may have been burned by a guy so she is not willing to get into that position again , next time you guys talk , before you finish the conversation say hey call me back in a while I have some things to do ,or say hey call me tomarrow and we can try to hook up , if she just doesnt call then it is a sign you should probally be looking somewhere else , you dont have to dump her entirely, just dont put as much effoert into it and start to do other things , when you stop giving so much time to her , good luck ..............I dont think she is playing games but probally senses how you feel and isnt ready for that seirous of a deal right now .
2006-09-20 05:06:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
She's not playing games its just how some girls are. Once we become closer and more comfortable we will call. But its just like approaching guys. Guys seem to think a girl is easy or needy if she approaches you or interested in sex. So we LADIES like to let the man show his initiative. Let him take control. Its kinda old fashioned but it makes us feel special. I mean you guys do conversate for hours so she couldnt be playing games. Thats just how some LADIES are. Dont read so deep into it or it will have you confused for no reason.
2006-09-20 05:02:51 · answer #6 · answered by superbad~honeydip 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it is too early to say if she likes you or not. it could be that she doesn't want to look cheap by calling you. it is obvious that she likes you.
It is better you let her know how you feel and see if she will give you a call. if you have more than one number, let her have all your numbers. About you not seem needy, when you are in love, you can't hid it. Love should be 50/50. That is, you are both in love, you would want to do things together and always want to be with each other. whereby this is not happening, then the love is one sided.
good luck!
2006-09-20 05:14:57 · answer #7 · answered by irebless_05 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
tell you what. you keep calling her till it becomes a habit. wait for a period of time, like say 3 weeks, then you stop calling her. if she misses you she will take the initiative and wonder why you stopped calling her :)
2006-09-20 05:10:07 · answer #8 · answered by Duh! 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like she is playing it smart. I think she likes you but is scared of running you off.
I absolutely refuse to call a guy until I know how he feels. I'm not forcing him to talk to me and I'm not bugging him, I'm letting him contact me when he is ready.
2006-09-20 05:05:30 · answer #9 · answered by ajd1bmf 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
mmm,sounds like me.
maybe she is just lazy or she is the type who does not take e initiative.but if she is reali interested,she should contact u.
actually,u can ask her in a teasing way amd see her response.
if u like her,u can ask her n wait.
2006-09-20 05:02:22 · answer #10 · answered by indulge in mine 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋