my four year old son won't eat i literally have to feed him. what should i do ?

Answer 1

Stop feeding him. If someone offered to feed you every night you'd accept, why feed yourself; and that's just what your son is thinking. Short of a medical reason why he's not eating, he's enjoying the fact that he's being fed by mom. If mom stops feeding him he's left to start feeding himself again, which he will. Make sure to emphasis that meals are to be eaten at a specific time, and wait, he gets hungry, he'll eat.

Answer 2

It is not uncommon for food to become a power issue with children. Because he "won't" eat, he has chosen that behavior for whatever reason. I would suggest that you start offering him his food at meal times and snack times. If he chooses not to eat it, do not feed it to him. When the meal is over, remove his food and take it back to the kitchen. Depending on what it is, you can save it for him to eat at snack or his next meal. Children will not starve themselves. He will eat when he is hungry. Keep all comments about his eating habits non-emotional. Stick to the facts. If he doesn't eat, just say, "I see you weren't hungry, we'll have snack time in 2 hours." You may want to give him a "head's up" that you will no longer be feeding him and that he will be expected to feed himself. Feed him as usual at his next meal and then let him know this is the last time you'll be doing it for him. Then you must stick with it and NEVER relent. Depending on your child's personality, he may refuse to eat or he may throw a tantrum. Regardless of what he does, do not give in and feed him. He will see you mean business, but it may take a while. Evaluate how much time you are spending with him away from meals. Make sure he gets plenty of your attention at other times, too, as your feeding him may be his perception that "this is the only time that mom really pays attention to only me". Children do things because they get something out of it. If he needs more times to be in charge, let him pick things like which shirt to wear, whether to have an apple or a banana at lunch, or should you read Cat in the Hat or Pokey Little Puppy for a bedtime story.

Answer 3

My daughter went through the same thing. When she started preschool, the teachers told me to give her the food, and set a timer for 30-45 minutes and have them eat until the time is up. after that, no food. That was a good idea until she skipped two or three meals straight. I tried to make her feel comfortable and just kept feeding her until she was full for a while after that but it had to stop. She now has many small meals when she is hungry and that seems to keep her satisfied, especially when she is always doing something, small meals are quicker and take less time.

Answer 4

How much your child eats may be very different from how much another child eats. Don't worry if it seems that your child doesn't eat enough at one meal. Children often make up for a small meal or a missed meal at the next mealtime.

You'll know your child is eating enough if he or she is growing at the right rate. Talk to your doctor if you have any concerns about how your child is growing
Offer your child food that is tasty and looks good, and offer the right amount. A good rule of thumb is to offer 1 tablespoon of each kind of food for each year of your child's age. If your child is still hungry, you can serve more. Don't force your child to clean his or her plate. Once he or she is no longer hungry, your child should be allowed to stop eating.

Try not to bribe or force your child to eat. Threats or punishments aren't good ideas either. If your child doesn't want to eat, accept his or her refusal. Even though you may be concerned, don't show your child that you are upset by this refusal to eat. If your child is seeking attention, your disapproval fills that need, and he or she may try to gain your attention in the same way another time.

Answer 5

Kids will eat when they get hungry. Some days they eat a lot and some hardly anything. Make easy finger food choices for him. But stop feeding him - he most likely likes being a baby again.

Answer 6

Stop making feeding about control. Don't fight with him about it. Kids will not starve themselves to death. When he is hungry he will eat. Too many times adults make an issue about a kid not eating dinner. If we're at dinner we all sit together. If my kids aren't hungry then they don't have to eat , but they still have to sit at the table. When they do get hungry, I pull out the same dinner plate and heat it up and that's what they eat. They can't have chips or anything else until they eat dinner.
I was always from the "clean your plate" era. I'm trying not to do that to my kids. Maybe dinner/lunch is too early. Try waiting until he tells you he's hungry to make it. He knows his body, just because he's little doesn't mean he doesn't have the sense to eat when hungry.

Answer 7

My 11 year old son doesnt eat either. But the doctors say if they continue to gain weight even 1 pound per doctor visit they are fine! Maybe buy some flintstones vitamins.

Answer 8

Offer meals and snacks at predictable time each day. If he doesn't want to eat, he can be excused from the table till the next meal/snack time. Eventually he'll be hungry enough to eat. I would NOT feed him yourself, you are turning it into a control issue, and he's winning!

Answer 9

Just put his meal in front of him. Let him know he is abig boy and big boys feed themselves. I know is hard, but try not to hover over him, cause w kids the more you try to make them do something, the more they dont.
If hes got a problem picking up the food, put his food in the spoon/fork and he'll eventually put it in his mouth himself.
Does he have a snack b4 meals, they probably should be cut out.
I tried this w my 2 yr old, and it worked.

Answer 10

What you need to do is quit feeding him. If he gets hungry enough he will feed himself. And if he wants to get up cause you won't feed him tell him that is unacceptable and he is not getting up until he takes at least one bite of something.