Question about closeness and moving from friendship to more!!!!??????
I have this best friend, I'm a guy, she's a girl, we are 15 and have known each other for 2 years. When we hang out in a group, we are always standing close to each other. We playfully fight with and mock each other all the time. She calls me Reilly, even tho everyone else calls me by my first name and if they call me Reilly she gets anoyed. We are very comfortable with each other. On a couch we sorta lean into each other, anyway, I am pretty sure now that she likes me, an I know I like her, A Lot, so what should I do next? Should I test the waters by hugging her? An arm round the shoulder or waist? Any advice?
Specifically I want to know what I should do next and how.
Also, sholud I make it apparant to her that I am trying to change our relationship?
2006-09-20 03:20:50 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
don't assume anything, don't cross the boundary of touching in a lover's manner UNTIL & BEFORE u ask her.
honesty is the best, tell her your feelings for her. it better for her to know, if she feel the same than that's good, if not, at least u have not violated your friendship with her in touching her unexpectedly. this will help the 2 of u know where each of u stand & what's expected out of these relationship.
if the feeling is mutual, discuss how far the 2 of u should go physically. remember u guys r young with much promises ahead. don't ruin it.
take care & peace, man
p.s email me if u need to.
2006-09-20 03:36:16 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you feel happy right now? if you do then whats the rush? your 15. if you really like this girl and wish a long term relationship with her then take it slow. just like you know how you both feel , she knows as well. dont spoil what you have right now. after all you dont plan to go any further than where you are any time soon. ( i mean sex , marriage etc.) atleast i hope not. if you both live near and there is no indication of either moving far away then let things be. talk to her about what her plans for the future are get to know here even better than you know her now. the best relationship in the world is between two best friends. get to know here inside and out and when the time comes you will know what to do. trust me and dont worry about anything right now just enjoy your time together without complicating matters . good luck.
dont end up like many teens getting married early or having sex and becoming parents at 16 - 17 and ruining their lives and ending with 2 jobs and 3 kids and no education. concentrate on your studies and cherish this time. you will thank me 15 years from now.
2006-09-20 10:33:20 · answer #2 · answered by ash 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't see anything wrong with a little flirting, just go up to her and ask her if the two of you and only the two of can go to a movie or get a bite to eat? If she accepts then take it from there, let her know how your feelings are changing and that you are interested in becoming more than just her best friend, I was in the same situation, I knew mine since I was 9! I'm 35 sweetie and have been dating my best friend for the past 4 and a half years! He knows everything about me! Of course he even gave me advice on dating! When all along he was falling in love with me before I even thought of it! Now we can't live without eachother! :) Good Luck sweetie let me know how it all goes!
2006-09-20 10:29:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alright, here we go.....
First of all you're doing the right thing by teasing her, mocking her, all that sort of thing. DO NOT stop that. Once you stop that you're a wussy and girls don't like wussies. Keep playfully busting on her. Got that straight.
Don't ever just say i like you, and want to move forward. Let her figure it out. This keeps you with the upperhand. (Not in anyway am saying ever be mean to her, just keep it on your level.) Girls are wired differently so you kind of have to play the game if you want to get anywhere. By the way, you should wait before you do anything serious with her. I know it's tempting but it comes with a ton of problems.
It's good that you're leaning in to each other and hitting each other. That means she digs you already. Girls don't touch guys they don't like. Had I known what I know now at your age......Anyways, maybe start grabbing her hand a little, you know touch it, feel it out, but gently. See what she does then. Don't be afraid of her though. Just touch her hand like it's your own hand, like it's no big deal, like you should be touching it. Don't poke at it or nothing :P
Things will eventually turn your way if you keep these two pieces of advice in mind....
Never become a wussy. You're letting her touch you, not the other way around. Confidence, not *********.
You'll be fine, half the battle is already won buddy.
Now Go Get Her!
2006-09-20 10:32:23 · answer #4 · answered by loveguru 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I wouldn't be so bold, at least not right away, you could ruin it before you even get a chance, but I would be honest with her....(Ask your parents first if this is okay)....then, ask her to come over this Saturday to pizza and some rentals....asking " just her" gives her the impression that you maybe want more.....but, gives you both the freedom of remaining friends if one of you doesn't really feel the same....Read her body Language and go from there....Be Prepared though, because she is only fifteen she may not be allowed to date yet, so don't do something that would put you in a bad situation with her parents.....If she comes out and asks you, your intentions, you're best bet is take a deep breath and be dead honest with her on your feelings......trust your Instincts and don't second guess yourself...Good Luck
2006-09-20 10:37:43 · answer #5 · answered by Erin O. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is so awesomely cute! Often us girls have to wait for you guys to make the first move. It seems like she is letting you know how she feels in small ways......you have to open your eyes to her signals. Next time you're around her, try holding her gaze with your eyes; even while hanging out in your group. Judge her reaction. Does she smile and look away......does she look nervously uncomfortable? Best friends make the best relationships. Sure, I say try out your hug....but DO NOT FORCE IT!
You sound like a cool guy (anyone named Reilly is cool to me) and it seems that you're picking up some vibes from her. Go for it dude!!!
Good Luck!!
2006-09-20 10:30:41 · answer #6 · answered by Bathroom Graffiti 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her know how you feel. Nothing wrong with hugging her, friends hug all the time. You should ask her how she feels abut maybe taking your friendship to another level. It can't hurt to ask.
The only thing is, sometimes people change when a friendship is taken to the next level.
Just be careful because you don't wanna ruin your friendship with her. I've been there
2006-09-20 10:26:43 · answer #7 · answered by bad_dog76 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to test the waters then take her to a movie and do the Greg Brady move where you yawn, stretch out your arms and then put your arm around her seat. If she eventually cuddles beside you then you have a chance. If she pulls away or sits more forward then you ought to back off for a while.
Also I would tell her that you like her in that way. If she does not feel the same way you do, then do not allow that to change your mood or your feelings towards her.
2006-09-20 10:32:18 · answer #8 · answered by Joe K 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First ask her out on a date. Just the two of you and see what she says. Then if the date is progressing the way you want it to. As the two of you are walking along side by side reach down and take her hand in yours. And see how she reacts to you. If she goes along with it then do what ever comes naturally. And at the end of the date as you take her home walk her up to the door and as you say good night reach out to kiss her.
2006-09-20 10:37:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You seem quite insightful for a 15 year old boy. I would definitely talk to her. Chances are she is feeling the same way about you. From what you are telling us, it seems that she already thinks of you as hers. She gets annoyed with other friends for calling you a name that only she calls you. Yep I would say she definately likes you more then friends.
2006-09-20 10:25:01 · answer #10 · answered by heaven o 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋