He acts as if the world was to revolve around him and that everyone else was scum under his feet.
2006-09-20 03:05:13 · 27 answers · asked by johnvarelman 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
We have tried everything. HE even treats his father the same way!!!
2006-09-20 03:11:41 · update #1
Every single person I know that has a 10 yr old complains about this! And only one of them has ever encouraged it...the rest of us have tried to get our kids to be independent and to handle their own stuff and to treat everyone with respect. After dealing with this and talking to some of my older friends with boys who are older now I've just decided that it's hormones. (I know my son is starting puberty...he's almost ready to shave and he's 10!) and as hard as it is I think you just have to keep on with the discipline and letting him know what's he's doing is unacceptable and hopefully this is just a horrible phase. I know looking back on mine and my siblings childhoods we were not the nicest to our parents (though we were fine with other people) about that age and we've all turned out alright.
Hang in there! I know it's tough and frustrating and don't even bother listening to most ppl that'll reply to this b/c most don't even have kids and it's easy to criticize a situation you've never been through!
2006-09-20 03:57:38 · answer #1 · answered by . 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I also have a 10 year old son (He is an only child, so you can imagine) In the past 6 months I have broken him of all his habits of thinking the world revolves around him. I now refuse to help him do most everything. He pretty much does everything on his own except fix his meals. He has chores to do every morning before I drive him to school, and they have to be done the right way. I have had to put my foot down and say no more. Just let him know, if he wants a drink, he has to get up and get it himself. Do this with everything, it will break him of this habit real fast.
2006-09-20 16:09:26 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi
Welcome to pre adolescent fun!
This trransition did not occur overnight even if it seems it did...
take a close look at your behavior towards others and him and also that of the other adult he is around
He may be modeling after them, you or other children.
Having said all of this...
You do no mention siblings... is he an only child..
Regardless age 10 begins to get tricky with some kids and also tends to be a fairly ego centric time for both boys and girls.
I would encourage you to give him duties around the home and explain how you want them done and the consequences if they are not done or done correctly.
Kids this age als tend to do things they dont want to do 1/2 assed so to speak.
If you offer rewards or allowance for the duties then do not give them if the jobs are not done well.
I would also sit him down with dad if possible and talk to him about hw it makes you feel to be so disrespected and the actions that will be taken if it continues.
For us , when our chld, now 12 began the disrepsect, we made it clear it wold not be tolerated.
It was a struggle and still is but after a warning for attitude then a privilage is taken away..
It may take him time to get it... but he can contrrol his attitude and tongue
Thing is many times they do not realize how they are coming off... video taping might help so he can see for himself...
I hope this helps and I wish you well on your bumpy ride
Wismom
2006-09-20 05:45:46 · answer #3 · answered by Wismom 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
until he changes his attitude make him do all the chores. Take away everything he owns and make him earn it back. He is 10 and already has this attitude, imagine how bad it will be in a few years if you don't nip it in the bud. This may have started through the way you treated him when he was younger, did you make life revolve around him? My kids have helped around the house from 2, starting with little things and working up to several everyday jobs. They know they are a part of a family and as such have to help around the house
2006-09-20 22:03:54 · answer #4 · answered by Rachel 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Teach him how to "earn" things. Start with his interests, like make him do a load of laundry for 10 minutes of playing games or TV watching (I even made coupons for this). When he doesn't do his chores, take away his things and make him earn it back. Keep consistent - very important. Don't give in. Kids are pretty easy to control if you communicate on their level and use their interests. My 12 year old son has always been "all about himself" from about the age of 10 on. But I keep him on a reality check by making him earn his TV time, computer, internet, cell phone, etc. The minute he leaves his room a mess, he loses one of these privileges and doesn't get it back until he's earned it. He has learned cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. and has a better respect for what it takes to keep it all done every day. I doubt he'll grow up thinking it's only "women's work", at least he'll know how to do it. He's also very mean to his older brother, so every time he's mean, then he loses social privileges, and he has to be nice for a certain amount of time to get them back. This is teaching him that if he's mean to others, then he has no friends or fun either. I have a friend who gets so pissed at her 17 year old daughter because all she does is sit on the internet. They can't use their phone or anything and she won't get a job. How hard is it to take away the computer? It would do her a world of good. And making her earn it back, over time, would teach her what it takes for the parents to provide the computer, electricity, etc. Good luck!
2006-09-20 04:27:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have an eleven year old who went through the same thing. He suddenly developed this monster attitude and a sense of entitlement that drove me nuts!! I just wouldn't put up with it and started making him do more in the way of chores and all so he would see that my life was not alll about him and his wants. He had to earn things so he would respect them and he had to be made to understand that , while I love him and support him, I won't put up with him treating me like crap. It has taken some time, but he's coming around. Just tough it out with your son and dont' let him get away with being a brat. He'll get past it.
2006-09-20 05:44:08 · answer #6 · answered by Shelley L 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My little brother used to act the same way sometimes. My parents had a few ways to stop this behavior.
If my brother didn't clean his room, my parents would clear out his room. The toy box would disappear as would anything else fun in his room. In addition my parents would take out his dresser and pack enough clothes for him in a suitcase. He would essentially have to live out of that suitcase for like a week. They would also ground him to his room and make him read books and not Dr. Suess; thick 20-35 chapter books. Needless to say but at the end of his punishment he would have increased his reading abilities by a grade; funny that he became a writer.
I hope I could help you in some way.
2006-09-20 07:27:26 · answer #7 · answered by nmk9543 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My daughter went through the same thing. I set it up one day for her to be out of school so that she had to follow me all day and do exactly what I do in a day. I woke her up at 5 am and made her go out in the barn with me to feed and turn the horses out then inside to wake up everyone else and fix breakfast, then clean up, then start the normal daily cleaning, running, errands etc only to come home at noon and have to cook again, clean again then start laundry and get snacks ready for her brother and sister when they got home. I made her deal with the snacks and homework for both of them. As soon as that was done we had to feed and water horses again, run the younger two to soccer and dance come home fix supper clean up and then she got the task of gtting the other two in the tub and ready for bed a long with bed time stories etc and had to straighten the house after we had all called it a night. She fell inot bed exhausted and the next day she started to offer to help with things she hadn't done in a while. Might have been mean but it showed her that just because I am mom and don't work outside the home I still do more than she saw.
2006-09-20 09:31:02 · answer #8 · answered by Martha S 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Reverse rolls. Let him be the parent for a night and you be a child just like him.
Remember this child got this way somehow. This behaviour is not going to stop over night. And it is bound to get worse before it gets better.
Give him extra chores so that he can understand that value of a dollar, take him to a homeless shelter to volunteer so that he can understand how great he really has it. Make him live in the real world.
2006-09-20 03:12:38 · answer #9 · answered by yzerswoman 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
This does not happen overnight - sorry. If you have allowed this to go on for 10 yrs, you just might need professional help. There are a lot of good psychiatrists out there that deal with children. Call your doctor and get a recommendation.
2006-09-20 10:38:35 · answer #10 · answered by GP 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋