my boyfriend and i have been together for over 2 years, living together for about a year and a half...my problem is that anytime something happens in his life (ex. gma sick, step dad problems) he stops talk to me! it hurts because im trying to help him out but he completely shuts me out as if its my fault, he'll only talk to me when he has to, and sometimes will look straight through me as if i dont exist...his mom has thats the way he acts, but if it lasts longer then a few days, i just get emotional worn and break loose...i mean he'll snap out of it, but what do i do in the meantime to keep myself from going crazy or crying?
2006-09-20 02:29:53 · 18 answers · asked by sassy2sloppy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
im a very sensitive person
2006-09-20 02:31:05 · update #1
i dont think he blames me, but sometimes it feels that way, everyone has there own ways to coup with things, i just need to know how to adjust to his ways...im happy with him, im not going to dump him over something like this
2006-09-20 02:57:45 · update #2
It could just be the way he reacts to traumatizing events--I don't think it's anything done purposely to offend you. I act very much the same way and I guess I just clam up and like to think rather than talk. I can only hope that you are open enought to accept that perhaps this "is just the way he is"--if it really bothers you to the point of breaking down yourself, perhaps he isn't quite the right person for you. There has to be compromise in every relationship, but compromise over emotions or expression of emotions can be a very demanding challenge for both parties and it may be easier to find someone who is more emotionally compatibile with you. I hope this helps--good luck--
2006-09-20 02:40:42 · answer #1 · answered by djm3452004 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand what you are going through because most men don't like to share their feelings. My husband is the same way. In the beginning I felt hurt that he left me out but after a while it didn't bother me because that was how he handled things. You can't change him and it sure doesn't mean he loves you any less. I've been married 33 yrs. When I have a tragedy in my family I go to him for support and he's there for me. You learn each others personalities. We still have a great time together and love each other but we know each other like a book.
2006-09-20 09:38:59 · answer #2 · answered by winter715 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him understanding. Ask him what can you help. If there is no response, just ignore him and let him settle down himself for a few days. Some people has this kind of nature. At this kind of moment, they don't have any right or wrong, almost no feeling on the surrounding. A regular care for him would recover him fast. Over care would turn him nuts. Thinking that you are disturbing his thoughts and feeling and feels frustrated.
2006-09-20 09:34:46 · answer #3 · answered by AAA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, it doesnt sound to me like he loves you at all....if there is no communication, whats the point in being in the relationship at all??? Seriously, im asking for the sake of your future, i married a man that does the very same thing, weve now been married two years, together 5, and am now finding huge cracks in the relationship because he will not talk to me, when problems occur.......do your self a favour, get out NOW, because you leave it too much longer, you may find yourself with worse issues to contend with........
2006-09-20 09:34:38 · answer #4 · answered by Mintjulip 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sure there are other things about him that you love because you have been with him that long but is this the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. Someone who is making you feel guilty? or still has issues with problem solving? Do you think you deserve better than that? These are things you need to explore.
2006-09-20 09:34:32 · answer #5 · answered by Lady Mandeville 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a ex girlfriend like that something happen in the family it was like my fault and not speak to me either and stay quiet for days or a week sometimes and the way i solved that was i couldn't take that so i broke up with her.
2006-09-20 09:33:05 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think he means anything by it that's just the way he copes with his feelings. He shuts down. I would just talk to him and let him know that you are here for him if and when he needs to talk to someone and you hope that he knows you love him and only want whats best for him.....
2006-09-20 09:33:21 · answer #7 · answered by :)*taurus tease*(: 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just have to wait it out, but you should let him know that makes you feel. If he can't respect your feelings, well, maybe it's time to look for someone else.
Maybe you just need a couple of days apart to sort things out. All I can tell you is you gotta be strong, all relationships have their ups and downs
2006-09-20 09:33:14 · answer #8 · answered by bad_dog76 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This really sucks, I know b/c I go through it with mine. He's diagnosed with bipolar disorder; it would be a good idea to have him tested. Often people with this disorder are incapable of relating to other people emotionally & display characteristics of being self-absorbed. (I said often, not always, so no one jump down my throat, please). Medication can help with the up & down rollercoaster.
And hey- some people just suck naturally. : ( Either way, you have to decide if you really want to spend half of your relationship feeling ignored & insignificant.
2006-09-20 09:39:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
try to talk to him about your feeling when he is in a good. The problem will get bigger and bigger and bigger if u not talk to him, until 1 day it will explode and make both of u suffer..
The key is communication. with communication u can get sollution..
2006-09-20 09:38:01 · answer #10 · answered by John Q 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋