in my family, my gran plays favorites, and im the fav over my brothers and cousins, she even told me once that she only carried my photo in her wallet to show ppl, she gives me money, lots of it, when i was in college, she sent me $300.00 a month for nothing,
i love my brothers, and i feel bad, so now that im older, i find that i am pulling away from her, is that weird, i mean i want to see if she loves all of us, not just me, and when i was young my mom would give me hell, but i really wasnt me, lol it was my gran, and yes i do love her to death, but i dont want her to think that the only reason that i talk to her is for money, or fav,
i want to go see her, and stay with her for a month next year to help her out, shes old, but i dont want her to think that i only want to be there cause of her money, and for chirstmas i am flying her home, with my own money, but i know that when she gets here she will try to give it back,
wow i guess this bothers me more than i thought, LOL,
2006-09-20 01:27:52 · 9 answers · asked by Dawn C 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
it really wasnt me, LOL top paragaph
2006-09-20 01:28:48 · update #1
what should i do, i know that i cant talk to her about it, cause shes old, and im not sure what my mom will tell me, as her older brother is my grans fav, so shes on the same boat as my brothers and cousins, wow this is stressing me, LOL
2006-09-20 01:30:36 · update #2
money is the way that i was shown love, but my gran over killed it,
2006-09-20 01:36:37 · update #3
no it`s not weird, she`s family and really loves you! So stop worrying your beautiful little head off!
2006-09-20 01:39:22 · answer #1 · answered by scott r 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really don't think your gram thinks you want to be around her for her money, if she did, she sounds like the type of person that would cut you off. I know how guilty it is to be the favorite. My mother told me I was her favorite when I was young. Because of this I rebelled a lot. I smoked at 11 drank at 12 did pot at 14. Luckily, I grew out of it and became a well adjusted person. I no longer do any of those things, but I learned to never put that kind of pressure on my kids. That's unfair of your gram to do. She just thinks telling you your her favorite makes you feel special, but in fact it makes you feel like hell. I know. There's nothing you can do about it. The only thing I would suggest is share the wealth with your family. If she gives you money spend equal amounts on the rest of the family. You can even say it's from gram (technically she paid for it right?) And when she dies, if she leaves you more than the rest of your family, again share the wealth. At least then your brothers/sisters and mom will know YOU love them equally.
You can't control what your gram does. Only she can. At this point, I don't think she's going to change.
2006-09-20 01:59:03 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, there is nothing wrong or weird with that. This clearly explains that you do love your gran and not for her money!
I was in the same situation some years ago. I used to live away from home and used to get back home every weekend. Every time before leaving I used to go to her place and greet her. Every time she gave me money. And so I begun thinking how bad I was feeling about that. I thought that I should not visit her but call her instead, so she wouldn't think I went there for her money.
Now, I DO REGRET not going up to her place. She died 3 years ago & I do really miss her. So darling, don't stop showing her how much you love and care about her. Tell her that you do love her, but you can't accept money from her, because this makes you feel bad.
Tell this to her and if she still is stuborn about that then accept the money. She gives it to you wholeheartedly.
Good luck
2006-09-20 01:48:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Don't pull away from your grandmother! How much longer to you think she's gonna be around? And why would you chance making her feel abandoned at this late stage of her life?
Grandma is grandma and she's gonna do what she wants to do regardless of what you may think. If she chooses to give you money, tell that she doesn't have to do that and if she says she's doing it because she wants to, you take it with a very loving 'thank you'. Even if all you do with it is stash it away somewhere.
It doesn't sound like she's giving you money in an attempt to 'buy' your love. It sounds like it's just a thing that she wants to do and you should stop reading more into than there really is.
2006-09-20 01:41:03 · answer #4 · answered by Lucianna 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Are you the only Granddaughter?? the first born maybe??? I don't know why they pick one as a favorite and show it. It was kinda the same way for me. I was the oldest but I think My Mommom just liked the person I was also, but as far as gifts there was no partiality. As far as pulling away, Don't, be there for her to show you're gratitude for all she has done for you. And just because she's old doesn't mean you can't talk to her. You just might be surprised at her wisdom and answers that she may give you as long as she is still sharp in the mind.
2006-09-20 01:40:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I do agree with scott r's response and this the natural fact , just go and stay with her & enjoy each and every minutes of being there . She really loves you more than her own breath , so question doesn't arise , you are unnessasry burdening your head without any reason .
2006-09-20 01:52:58 · answer #6 · answered by your noon 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-17 08:02:00 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I won't count the number of times you said the word money but you are obviously obsessed by it. Money is a source of guilt for you. If it was not money it would be something else but right now it is money. You need to find out why money is so important to you.
2006-09-20 01:34:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Hey nothing last forever as long as it made of life, your growing up and are fast approaching a life of your own. Don't worry, be happy. it will work itself out...good luck
2006-09-20 01:44:56 · answer #9 · answered by bprice215 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋