Hmmm ... how about ... "Yeah, my eyes are bloodshot ... I've been drinking" "But holy crap officer, your eyes are really glazed ... you been eatin' donuts?"
ADD SOME OF YOUR OWN EVERYONE!!
2006-09-19 20:09:59 · 31 answers · asked by ♥Carol♥ 7 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
Are You Andy or Barney?
I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
I pay your salary!
Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
2006-09-19 20:30:51 · answer #1 · answered by momoftwo 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Got any dope? I heard cops get the best stuff!!!
No I ain't been drinkin'... I am drinkin'!
Rodney King!! Rodney King!!
I was gonna stop at that Red light but it was, like, such a baddd vibe man!
(breathalyzer) You're gonna blow me? Hey did you here that? The pig said he was gonna blow me!!!
Hey everyone SHUT UP!! The robots are here!!!
2006-09-20 05:22:52 · answer #2 · answered by rswdew 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know any jokes but i do know that you should never mention to a cop that you're nervous! i was in the car w. my cousin once and we got pulled over, an officer was at my window and hers and my cousin says, "oh my cousin is just nervous" the cop at my window was like "why is she nervous?!" in a mean-o commanding voice.
2006-09-20 03:12:58 · answer #3 · answered by Heat seeking missile 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Do you know the most unsafe bank in town Mr. Officer?"
"Hey, arent you the cop I outran last month after the National Bank robbery?"
2006-09-20 06:29:20 · answer #4 · answered by police 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Read this!
You: "Hey! Today I found myself damn too lucky"
Cop: "how come?"
You: “I just found a locked empty house full of money with its key left in the key hole!!!!"
Now that is what I call “FORBIDDEN FOR YOU TO SAY TO A COP" :p ;)
God Bless ^__^
2006-09-20 03:49:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Any of the things Mel Gibson said the last time he was arrested.
2006-09-20 06:44:46 · answer #6 · answered by Kuji 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Officer "Why were you going so fast?"
Not the best reply "Well your wife said you were on you way home, and I had to go fast."
2006-09-20 04:07:19 · answer #7 · answered by loveorlust06 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Officer, Officer, Officer... you can't give me a ticket! Do you know who I am... hu hu hu... I am Osama Binladen's personal assistant. I mean we are like brothers ya know. So you see, you cant give me a....
hey... hey... hey... what are you doing with that gun!
2006-09-20 05:15:40 · answer #8 · answered by lifelivenow@sbcglobal.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry sir was I flying to low to the ground?
2006-09-20 03:20:05 · answer #9 · answered by Elaine814 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"well, hell, officer. I only stabbed him 32 times and I know he's still in the trunk!"
2006-09-20 04:33:12 · answer #10 · answered by darrenrom9071 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋