I recently took out a protective order against my husband. However, I'm due to go into labor with our daughter any day. I have no fear of him harming me or the baby while we are in the hospital. Should I call him when I go into labor? Or after I have the baby? Or should I just send him a birth announcement along with everyone else?
2006-09-19 16:02:08 · 23 answers · asked by smittnwithkittns 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Ummm...no...
If he wasn't there while you were pregnant, why give him the gratification of being present during the birth? Not to mention the fact that you have a restraining order against him...However, rely on close family members and/or friends to help you at this time.
I'd even debate sending him a birth announcement.
2006-09-19 16:10:53 · answer #1 · answered by The ~Muffin~ Man 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi I just went through the same thing with my best friend. Her boyfriend was an alcholic and he left her when she was 5months when she had her daughter she just decided it would be best to send an announcement. I think it really depends on if you want him to be in yours and your childs life. If you feel that he might be a danger to your child then you should just have those closest to you be with you during the birth. He might also make you uncomfortable and all that matters while your in delivery is that you are comfortable. I hope this has helped you make your decision I know how hard it is not to have the father around I've experienced it second hand. Good luck and God bless!
2006-09-19 16:21:12 · answer #2 · answered by Jonesy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well are you comfortable with him being there? Is he going to bring a lot of drama and extra stress to you? If you think he is going to cause any problems I would call him after the baby is born and tell him. If you don't want him coming to the hospital to visit with you and the baby give the hospital a copy of the protective order. Any hospital I have heard of will do anything they can to make you, the patient, the most comfortable.
2006-09-19 16:12:05 · answer #3 · answered by aerofrce1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that all depends on you. You got a protective order for a reason. Whoever u decide to be in that room with you can't be arguing with u or threatening you or anything b/c u have your baby to worry about. But if u feel that this is a big day even for him and want to be amicable, you could invite him IF you arent going to stress more. If u have any chance of being more stressed, i would have the baby and then call him when u are in your hosp. room recovering and he can come have time with her.
2006-09-19 16:05:51 · answer #4 · answered by azuleyes404 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your daughter might resent you one day for not including her "dad" at the birth. I would have him present with restrictions. Like he has to leave shortly after the birth is over. If you plan on divorcing him and getting support from him, he is going to have visitation rights anyway. Don't give him a reason to not cooperate with you. Work with him a little.
And I am saying this without knowing details that may change my opinion so you should just do what is right.
2006-09-19 16:08:15 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well seeing as though he is the father he should knowwhen the baby is born. because u have a protective order against him when u go into labour ask a relative to call him and let him know, he doesn't have to be in the room with u when u give birth but he may want to visit in the hospital when the baby is born. give him the choice to come in.
no matter what the relationship was with my son's father i would never stop him from seeing his boys. but it's up to you. i think it would be best to ask a relative or close friend to call him.
2006-09-19 16:08:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say that if you had taken out a protective order, he should not be around you or the baby no matter where you are at. There's obviously a reason you had to, and best thing is to stick to the protective order.
2006-09-19 16:05:41 · answer #7 · answered by melashell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just to let you know, if you invite him your protective order will no longer be any good. In most states when a protective order is issued and the complainant later allows the person to be around them especially if you invite them to be there, then the order is no good after that date. Better check to see,
2006-09-19 16:11:24 · answer #8 · answered by emortalwolf 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
In the state I am in if you contact him, and he can call the police and get you arrested for breaking your own protective order which you do deserve. The protection order is for a time limit, and not to your convences. He knew you were pregnant, but he choose to act like a fool. He is danagerous. It sound like you would like to welcome more drama to your new baby's life. (why would you want to do that). Leave him alone until the protective order is expired. Until and only until it Expires!!
2006-09-19 16:15:36 · answer #9 · answered by Errolyn27 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell no. I mean, HELL NO. If you allow him back at all, it gives him permission to extend that inch into a mile. You've already been here, girl-you know what to do. Just you wait till that baby is born-you will fight to the death to keep him AWAY from that little one, knowing what he has done to you that caused you to get a protective order.
2006-09-19 16:10:01 · answer #10 · answered by curiositycat 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋