I've been seeing this guy for a month. I like him a lot & I hope to be his girlfriend eventually. He's introduced me to mom & dad & all of the friends. We've had sex already & I was kinda expecting him to make it official but... he hasn't brought it up. He still very much considers himself a single guy & I have a feeling he might still be dating other girls. Should I just bail on this guy or give him a little bit more time? I didn't get into this to be someone's f**k buddy. Remember that it's only been a month & that might seem too quick for him to commit..... Be honest. If you think I'm being used I need to hear it...
2006-09-19 15:14:46 · 27 answers · asked by Jenny J 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First, you need to have a serious talk with him and not beat around the bush by waiting for him to talk to you about it. If he's seeing other girls, then he's probably assuming that you're okay with it. Let him know that you want it to be official and set him straight. If he can't make a decision right there, then let him go. Eventually, you'll hear from him within a few days or maybe a week. If you don't, then you know that it's fair game to look for a serious relationship with someone else. Also, if he's dating another girl with the same intentions of wanting an official relationship, you should act quick (that is if you think he's worth it) before someone takes him away by asking him first. You know what you want, so make it be known. You seem strong and smart by noticing that there's a problem right now, so take matters into your own hands. Best of luck.
2006-09-19 15:23:21 · answer #1 · answered by Natalia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you didn't make it clear that you wanted more so the default reality is that you are just his buddy. A sense of commitment must come before sex if that is what you are expecting. Start building relationships with some communication so you can find out where he thinks things will go down the road.
Most guys do not introduce someone they met a month ago to people as their gf since it is way too soon for that.
2006-09-19 22:17:01 · answer #2 · answered by Plasmapuppy 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would not think your being used, you did meet the family however if he just wants to be friends then you have to respect that.. You never set the foundation of what type of relationship you was building in the first place.
I would say start over get to know him for who he is, leave the sex out of the game plan because.. you might want more because you gave up your body,,,, and he might say hey we are still friends nothing more or less..
Learn to build a solid foundation before droppin the panties.. just sit back and wait or simply ask him what does he want out of all of this..
2006-09-19 22:21:38 · answer #3 · answered by M M 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Have you actually discussed this with him? I've found myself in that sort of thing a few times and always afraid to speak up for fear I'd scare him away. Wrong way to go because on more than one occasion, I found out they thought the same and didn't want to bring it up for the same reason, so each thought the other was in it for sex only. Okay...yeah, back to my point - discuss it with him. Ask him what he wants out of the relationship and share your own thoughts on the relationship and what you want out of it. If it's not the same thing, well then perhaps it is best to part ways.
And too, I would also like to mention that the current relationship I am in, we have been open and honest about what we wanted from the get go, and to this point, it is the best relationship I have ever been in.
2006-09-19 22:20:11 · answer #4 · answered by Sunidaze 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately you have allowed yourself to be like every other girl. You are his **** buddy and in my honest opinion that is not going to change. Next time dont rush into sex so soon. Giving it up before a relationship with someone who has commitment issues only shows them you have nothing more to offer than what they can already get somewhere else.
2006-09-19 22:22:08 · answer #5 · answered by KendraKay 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Its always a bad choice to have sex with a partner when you have known him/her for only a month. It's even far worse to have sex before you are married. This guy is useing you and he will drop you when he wants new women to conquer. You will then realize the depth of your hurts and the pain and loneliness of giving up your virginity. The only way for a sexual relationship to have any meaning is through marriage and total commitment.
Freckles
2006-09-19 22:22:42 · answer #6 · answered by Wedge 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think that you guys will grow together, but give it some time. Do not call him, let him do all the calling. Let him ask you on all the dates. Keep yourself busy in a positive way, and that will draw him closer to you. Men love to chase women, so do not make yourself too too available.
2006-09-19 22:21:56 · answer #7 · answered by Errolyn27 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think your more concerned about what he wants ,than how you feel initially you could have tried expressing what you wanted out of the relationship. by allowing him to regulate the parameters of the relatinship...its easier to get the milk for free rather than by the cow. the game (interaction) is best played when the rules are establised at the door.
2006-09-19 22:50:54 · answer #8 · answered by rhaeyez029 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like honey your being used right now until he makes up his mind if he wants to become serious with you or not. I did not have sex with my fiance until about the 6 month mark of dating
2006-09-19 22:17:26 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Iff you got introduced then he might not think of you as a ******* buddy. Give hon time. Maybe he thinks you already are more than that. why dont you ask him?
2006-09-19 22:18:09 · answer #10 · answered by wittlewabbit 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋