My teenage son aged 15 seems very low at the moment. How do you decide when depression is a problem?

Question

How do you decide how much is just normal teenage mood swings? He is particularly depressed by his work load with his GCSE's.

Answer 1

It's a really tough one. Many teenagers do suffer from mood swings, and many are under huge amounts of stress with exams, as well as all the other issues such as girlfriends / boyfriends, peer pressure etc. If you have a good open relationship, talk to him, see if he'll open up to you. If you are really concerned, suggest you go to your GP together to find out if he needs a bit of extra support right now.

You could also find out if his school has a counsellor, and suggest gently to him that he might like to go and see him / her, just to 'offload'.

Otherwise, all you can do is 'be there' for him and let him know that you will always be prepared to support him and listen to him.

Answer 2

If his workload is ticking him off, talk to his teachers, see if he really needs to be taking so many, teens are depressed a lot anyway, I have a teenage son, you need to ask him, maybe he feels like he has no friends, or maybe he feels he never has any fun, raging hormones are a bugger to deal with, especially when other stuff like schoolwork, self conciousness, wanting a girlfriend, etc etc are getting in the way, its all a bit much for a young person, maybe he just wants to loaf about a bit more, see if you can help him work out a timetable so he gets more free time.

and dont hassle him too much, he will work it out, if his exams dont work out its not the end of the world, everybody cant be the director of ICI, just let him feel he has some control over what happens to him, he can always go back to studying at a later stage, thats what the Open University is for!

Answer 3

Kids of 15 can often seem preoccupied and withdrawn. But I would start worrying if he stops eating properly, or if he becomes particularly moody or bad tempered. Also if he becomes very withdrawn. I would worry if he was a boy who liked to hang around with friends and suddenly stopped doing that. I would try sitting down with him and having a quiet chat, ask him if anything is getting him down, if he is worried about anything. Assure him that you are there for him, that you will help in any way you can, and that he can talk to you about anything. Ask him if he wants to go and talk to his doctor about the way he is feeling, sometimes kids just want someone to suggest that that is an option and they will take the opportunity to discuss how they are feeling. Dont worry too much about him, just keep an eye on him, Ive been there, I have three children who have been through their own difficult times, I find giving them extra love and attention often works wonders, and allowing him to feel a little
" off " now and again is only fair, we all have bad patches, good luck, its not easy being a parent!

Answer 4

can he concentrate on his work? depression is a bad thing at the moment as there is alot of pressure put on teenagers during exams, if you are worried and nobody knows your son as well as you- take him to the doctors, even if it is so he can talk to the doctor. i have said for the last few years there is far too much pressure on kids, ok, we all want our children to pass their exams, but is it really the end of the world if they don't get the A grades? there is always the option to re-sit. Tell him you will be proud of him no matter what his grades are, the most important thing is he tried his best. If he knows your proud no matter what it may boost his confidence so he may not get so worked up.
Rather than try cramming revision all in at once, do a couple of hours, have a break then another half hour or so, he will be able to take more info in too.
Don't take any chances, if you are worried, just have a word with the doctor, he/she won't mind plus it will put your mind at ease.
good luck (to you both)

Answer 5

I've suffered from chronic clinical depression since I was in my teens... It wasn't diagnosed until 3 years ago. (I'm almost 36 now).

There are many depression support groups on Yahoo! and you can get advice on them.

If the workload is too high, then perhaps he should just drop some GCSEs. I left shool before the end of my final year and joined the army.. I then went to university 5 years later and got a degree.... your son should realise that "paper" qualifications don't necessarily mean much to employers, these days.

I hope he is well.

Answer 6

Depression is always a problem. Talk & mainly listen to your son. He should be able to trust you and should be able to let down his gaurd and really talk to you, alone. Take a trip somewhere different to decuss what might be giving him problems. Also, realize his problems (depression) is real to him, no matter how small it may appear to you as an adult focus on him and don't just tell him what to think or do. You can not change your mood like that and he will have a hard time too. As Jimmy Buffett says "Changes in latidude, changes in attuide"

Answer 7

Moodiness and feeling low aren't really signs of depression.
Depression is when symptoms last for a number of weeks; some fairly common symptoms are:

*a lack of interest in previously enjoyed activities or pasttimes

* a notable lack of energy; not able to get out of bed in the morning

*changes in eating habits - either eating more or less; it varies among people

*changes in sleeping habits ` either sleeping all the time [and still tired] or not sleeping as much

*unable to concentrate, especially if it's a change

*short attention span even when involved in previously enjoyed activities

My now 14 year old daughter displayed many of these symptoms, but even though I myself have had depression for over 35 years - 20 years undiagnosed, it took me awhile to really notice. It happened fairly gradually and it wasn't any one thing, but she was never happy and she wasn't the person she'd been up to then.

A physical check up is a must to begin diagnosing the problem.

Don't forget though, that the teen years are some of the worst years of a person's life - there are so many outsides stresses as well as tremendous hormonal changes. It's not easy being a young adult!

Good luck and Take care!

Answer 8

This is a tricky one

Technically if it is affecting his quality of life then it is a problem and should be addressed. On the other hand humans seem to have forgotten that we are meant to be sad sometimes and it is a natural part of life, about half of teenagers are mildly depressed at some point, and furthermore giving antidepressant pills to young people should be avoided where possible because they have not been well tested on children and some of the side effects are serious.

But if he is seriously depressed (which you should decide between your son, yourself and your doctor) then treatment will improve his quality of life.

A very thorough description of teenage depression is at http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/001518.htm

I hope that helps

Answer 9

There are checklists on the net that you can go through to see if he is clinically depressed or just going through a bad patch. Clinical depression is an imbalance in the chemicals of the brain and can be treated by taking supplements of these chemicals.

Answer 10

you know it's a problem when he doesn't act like HIM anymore. if it looks like he's given up, give him something to live for. Give him affection and cook for him like when he was little. Show him your sympathy. For him to realize that "mom sees me struggle and wants to bring a smile on my face" will make him feel better. He may milk it, but he's your baby, so do it anyway. plus, don't be so turned off by giving him some meds. everybody needs a little help now and then. The meds will help him feel more in control, so you'll see big improvements.