I've been dating this really nice guy for exactly five months, he stays at my house alot and we seem a perfect match,but he has never said one word about how he feels for me !! I just think after five months of being with some one surely you have developed some feelings you would want to share ! (I have). How should I deal with this ? I don't want to scare him away, but I don't want to spend the next five months either waiting for him to say something. Any suggestions would be welcome here ! He is in is thirties (mid) I am in my 40's, Thanks
2006-09-19 05:33:06 · 13 answers · asked by aviatorannie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Don't jump to any conclusions. We men have a difficult time expressing our feelings. It's just not "manly" to say "baby, I love you" all the time. That being said, some guys are just along for the ride, and may just be enjoying some of the other benefits of the relationship.
So now it's on you. How do you feel about the relationship? How would it make you feel to find out he likes you, enjoys your cooking, and other stuff, but doesn't see the relationship going the distance? If he told you that, would you still want to be with him? Are you happy with the way things are now? If so, don't worry about it. You can continue being happy now, and if he does want to be with you forever, it will happen.
If you feel you need to know his feelings right now, so you could move on if he doesn't love you. Then maybe you don't feel about him the way you think you do. Ask yourself if it is him you love or the relationship that you love. If it really is him, and you think he is the one, don't be afraid of letting him know, but don't come on too strong. Just a simple "you are wonderful" up to a "I love you". No "I want to be with you forever"! If he feels the same way, he will come around and tell you, if not, it may be over, but it's better to end things and detach yourself from him, if he doesn't love you. That will make you available when the right one does come around.
2006-09-19 05:52:09 · answer #1 · answered by BrianW 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people just don't communicate well. Do you really talk much? Many couples communicate very little. They might talk a little about some of the things that happened to them that day ... buy not much about ideas, and feelings. The problem could be just communicating in general. You need to make time to talk ... and if this hasn't been established from the start ... most guys hate this. Once a "watch TV , bump uglies" routine is in place ...it's hard to change.
2006-09-19 12:54:47 · answer #2 · answered by Sam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys have a hard time expressing feelings. Maybe he is scared to because he doesn't want to get hurt, or thinks you don't feel the same way. You bring it up. One thing a relationship should have is communication. Tell him about your feelings. You should be able to express your feelings to him about anything and if you are scared to, then it might not be right. Give it a try and see what happens. Good luck.
2006-09-19 12:38:02 · answer #3 · answered by ConfusedK 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
5 months is still kind of early, and guys normally wait for you to talk about it first. So maybe one day tell him how you feel about him and see what he says then. Most guys are not going to just start telling a woman their feelings for her. It's a guy thing
2006-09-19 12:38:49 · answer #4 · answered by jlex_polite 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
man, you'd think he is over the games!
The 2 of u need to have a talk, quit the waiting game thing and come right out and ask him how he feels!
2006-09-19 12:37:31 · answer #5 · answered by koleebear 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
~I think you need to read COSMO hun...it has alot about the man's mind in there and one of them are " Most Men don't like sharing their Feeling"..defintly not with us...he is scared to...just let him know how you feel for him...don't go overboard with it...like "I want to spend the rest of my life with you!"...but let him know that he has a place in your heart...he'll take it from there.~~~> ;o}
2006-09-19 12:45:37 · answer #6 · answered by dreamzzz102 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it may just be that he is one of those quiet sorts.... how does he treat you is the big question..... some guys have a hard time expressing themselves verbally.... one way to find out is to ask.
2006-09-19 12:36:52 · answer #7 · answered by who be boo? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's insecure.
Either get used to it or move on; you're both past the age where you'll change.
2006-09-19 12:38:46 · answer #8 · answered by drumrb0y 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him if his intensions are serious if not break it off and find another boyfriend!
2006-09-19 12:37:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would just come out and ask him how he feels about you. Its not selfish...and if it scares him away, then it just wasn't ment to be.
2006-09-19 12:35:49 · answer #10 · answered by latina21_01ucf 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋