My daughter just turned 12 Friday and wants to meet her friend (girls and boys) at the movies on friday night. What is a proper age to start allowing this activity. She is very mature and I trust her fully but I am so scared someone else will hurt her or kidnap her or worse. Am I being over protective. (We live in the Kansas City Area)
2006-09-19 02:30:08 · 20 answers · asked by Ang 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
By "very mature," I'm assuming you mean she thinks on her own when a problem arises and makes good, sound decisions. If this is the case, the answer is yes for her. But the next question is do you trust the friends and/or adults she's going to go with? If you can't answer that one with the affirmative, then I'd say no and explain your reasoning to your daughter then offer to "escort" her and her friends to the movies.....staying in the background so she isn't too embarrased, being respectful of her growing need for independence and self-identity, and you can still be a good parent by ensuring their safety.
If you do trust the friends also, make sure she has the needed emergency gear like a cell phone with safety numbers listed as HOME or MOM, some money, and an ID on her (school, photo with her name on it, etc.).
Good luck! Letting her go isn't supposed to be easy. She'll be 30 years old and you'll still fret over her safety.
2006-09-19 03:04:46 · answer #1 · answered by Greywolf 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not being over protective.We live in a very different world now.I can remember going to the local grocery store to collect coke bottle caps.We used them to get into the movies during the summer.I think 5 bottle caps got us in to see 3 movies.I was 6 at the time, and I went once a week with my 3 older sisters and one younger sister.This was in a city of 60,000.In the early 70's,there was very little need to worry about child abduction.
These days you just can't be too cautious.
Maybe you could go to a different movie in the same theater,and her friends don't even have to know that you're there.
2006-09-19 09:37:08 · answer #2 · answered by hott.dawg™ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was probably her age when I started going to the movies with friends. Go over stranger danger with her. She has turned into a butterfly and is now letting her wings dry. You say that she has a good head on her shoulders...I don't think that that head is going to fall off as soon as she is out without adult supervision. It's not an easy thing to realize that children grow older everyday...You always see them as your babies. But what you have to realize is that they need experiences such as going out with friends and having fun. I know that if they are kept at home and sheltered they will become wild when they become older. (have an 18 year old step-daughter who is now that way...her mom sheltered her majorly) Plus they need to feel that they are trusted and until she proves otherwise there is no reason not to let her. Give her some rules that she needs to follow and like I said go over Stranger Danger with her and everything will be fine. I have two boys of my own 5 & 7 and two step daughters 15 & 18.
2006-09-19 09:45:40 · answer #3 · answered by Moon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I started seeing movies without my parents when I was around 12.
My daughter has been seeing movies with groups of friends since she was 12 and went on her first 'date' (just her and a boy) at a movie when she was 13. The nice thing is that movies are relatively controlled environments. You can drop them off and pick them up. You can also ask them about the movie as a sideways test to see if they actually went. I feel more comfortable with her at a movie with friends than at the park with friends or at a friend's house.
However, a lot depends on you and your relationship to her. If you feel you can trust her, you should.
2006-09-19 09:35:42 · answer #4 · answered by Wundt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kidnapping etc. is not something that is so common. You might be acting a little overprotective but then again, she is really young. I wasn't allowed to go to the movies with my friends till I was 16 ( Kansas too ) but if you drop her at the movies and then pick her up...you can relieve your fears somewhat.
2006-09-19 09:33:23 · answer #5 · answered by DrSH 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I started going to movies with older siblings (without parents) when I was about 8 years old. This was in the 1960's when life was much more innocent. I remember seeing "Santa Clause in Outer Space" at Christmas time with brothers and sisters, no parents.
2006-09-19 09:52:16 · answer #6 · answered by uncle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, I would only agree to this if I knew all the girls and boys, as well as their parents. Then, I would insist that at least one parent be present, either myself or one of the other kids' parents. The only other way I would allow it is if I were to sneak in behind her, and sit far enough away so I can watch her without her knowing I'm there. Granted, that's not the ideal solution.
2006-09-19 09:38:31 · answer #7 · answered by Joe & Amy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
12. But it was daytime. Drop off at the door and pick up from the door. Ring the cinema and get the time it will finish. Invite the gang home for a late night snack!
2006-09-19 09:33:56 · answer #8 · answered by girl from oz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was 12, but only allowed to go with a group and only during the early shows (still light out).
2006-09-19 09:32:36 · answer #9 · answered by Catmmo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Age has nothing to do with it. It depends on how mature the kid is. I know some 30-year-olds that I wouldn't let go to the movies alone.
2006-09-19 09:31:45 · answer #10 · answered by Trixie D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋