13 year old daughter has a boyfriend?

Question

I told her she is not old enough to have a boyfriend. How do I keep the relationship from getting out of hand without pushing her into being with him just to rebel against me?

Answer 1

I have a 13 year old daughter.I tell her any boy is NOT ALLOWED to touch her anywhere,she had a boyfriend.All they did was hold hands,and a peck on the cheek.I have sat and talked to her in depth about boys only wanting one thing,how she has her whole life in front of her.When I'm in town with her I always point out downtrodden mums with loads of screaming kids.I tell her that is what happens if you go any further with boys,saddled with kids and ruining your life.Drum it into your daughter like I have.They are in heat at that age with their hormones raging.Bir5ds and the bees?Ha its amazing the extent of what they know at that age!!!!

Answer 2

Hi I'm a 13 year old too and I respect your decision while at the same time by restricting her from these things shes more likely to rebel against you.
you can always let her have a boyfriend as long as hes the same age as her, nuthings likely going to happen. Parents these days dont seem to realise if its your first boyfriend your not going to want to go that far, shes probably happy enough just having a boyfriend at this stage to worry about things like that and another thing popularity is everything to kids these days I am one I know, even if she says she doesnt care about it deep down she does and if she were to do something more with him she'd be labelled a sl.ut, its harsh but it stops her from going the step (or 5) farther

Answer 3

Personally, I don't think a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship is appropriate for this age. This is middle school for gosh sakes! I would rather she remain non-exclusive and "play the field" so to speak by group dating. Insisting that she remain non-exclusive would allow her to learn about different kinds of boys. It would also keep her from getting too close to any one. So, that's what I would do. Tell her she can see him, but not exclusively. She also has to see her friends (without him). She should also talk to other boys, so she can learn more about them. (That's really what dating's for.) If she meets another boy she likes better, well then it's good she wasn't tied to the first in the first place. Exclusive dating may be what her friends are doing, but at her age it's not the best for her. Sell her on the single life.

PS I agree on having a sex talk with her too, if you haven't already done so.

Answer 4

TV shows 10 yr olds dating-kissing-teaching our kids and anything goes=when they should be into school, sports- art- music and the like. Sorry-some of the culture stinks-and kids see this stuff and think it's normal. anyway- you can blow it off like its no big deal=if she is doing it to rebel and ignore it- scary- huh? Or put your foot down, say ur not allowed to have a BF.What values have been instilled all there years? including love,sex and marriage- Focus on the Family has a great tape for teens and parents- It very worth it-family.org- take care D

Answer 5

ooohhh that's hard. well you can start by not trying to seperate them immediately. i would suggest that you invite the boy over for lunch or dinner. then have a nice talk with the two of them. explain that you have nothing against their relationship. what you want is just the best for them and their future. i'm sure you know already what to say. you've been in this situation before right? just make sure that you don't make them look like they have been doing something bad. well that's the way kids are now. agressive to know and experience what adults know and do.

Answer 6

That is a tough one Barb, and the truth is, if her friends have boyfriends then she is gonna want one too and unfortunately if you fight her over it, she is just going to do it behind your back.

If you haven't yet, I think that this would be the perfect time for you to have the 'birds and bees' conversation with her, and explain to her that you aren't against her having a boyfriend as such, but that you are just worried for her, you want her to be careful and therefore keep her from getting hurt.

Answer 7

maybe you should let her try and date him. they will eventually break up. she will eventually understand that she is too young to date.

and if not, don't force her to break up, that will make her rebel against you. explain to her why you don't think she is old enough to date.

or you could let her date, but keep it under control. have all dates parent monitered, or in a group. don't let the door be shut when they are alone. you get the point.

Answer 8

just sit beside her. and know what type of relationship is she maintaining with him and if it is a friendly one, it wont bother any of u.otherwise, if it is a bad one,tell her about its effects and slowly explain her what to do and what not to do at that age of 13 years. try to think from her point of view and you will get solutions to all of your questions. Tackle this situation very carefully .otherwise, the situation will get worse and the child will get a negative impression on you

Answer 9

Be understanding and COMMUNICATE vs. "telling" her she can't have a boyfriend. Maybe you could make compromises with her. Supervised dates and limited phone calls could be o.k., as long as it doesn't affect her grades or family time. She is growing up and will need to develop some personal skills over time, ready or not it is gonna get to that point.

Answer 10

Do not be like your mom and dad, be there as a mom and friend, keep that door open, it is almost time for you to have a sex ed class with your Daughter, instead of someone else telling her.