I am a little over weight, but I am very pretty and proportioned well and very curvy. Men just dont seem to be interested in me. I love to laugh and have fun and I am very outgoing & own my own business. Do men really want just a skinny girl even if she has no personality, looks or even a career. On all dating services, they all want the barbie doll type. To me, thats unrealistic. I am frustrated and want to give up all together. Do you have any advise?
2006-09-18 16:06:59 · 19 answers · asked by butterfly_kisses773 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A mature mind and a sexy figure
2006-09-18 16:08:35 · answer #1 · answered by ahd 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No...not all men want the barbie doll type. It might seem like that...because you are on the outside looking in. Just make sure that you aren't doing the same thing for yourself. I've known a couple women that have been less-than-petite, but hold their men to much higher standards. ... he MUST be this tall.... or this thin, and he MUST make this much money. If you have these unrealistic expectations...then you can't blame men for wanting similarly unrealistic things from their potential mates.... although i will fault all of you! :D
Bottom line... do what makes you happy...when you're happy...others will see it, and want to be around you. This includes potential boyfriends or husbands. Just make sure you show them how much you love sports! :D I'm sure that will help.
Alternative advise.... If you are successful in everything else you do... could you lose the weight? i mean...if this is.... the ONLY thing that you think is holding you back from finding the love of your life.... could you lose the weight? I'm not saying thats an ideal situation...but if "giving up" is the next best alternative.... I'd consider all the options.
Good Luck. I wish you the best.
2006-09-18 16:46:04 · answer #2 · answered by the_thoughtless_ponderer 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most men don't want a really "skinny" girl as much as they want someone who they find attractive. Most men like women with a nice, healthy body that has curves. If you really are "very pretty" and "proportioned" and men don't seem to be interested in you then you've got to ask yourself if you might not be giving off a negative vibe. While in a perfect world "personality" would rule, that's just not how most men are made biologically and psychologically. According to a recent study, in a survey of more than 30,000 men, more than 88% of them stated that they had to be physically attracted to a woman before they would even think of talking to her.
Online dating sites are on the down trend. While I recommend using them as just ONE way to meet men, you should also try other avenues such as through your church, going out more often, joining clubs, taking dance lessons, etc.
You shouldn't give up because men have different tastes. I wish I could see you in real life or have a few pictures to look at because the fact is that men want a woman that looks feminine. I hear some women tell me "but I'm not girly-girl" or "I don't want to have to change my wardrobe and put on make up to attract a man" is missing the point. You don't have to be all made-up like a barbie doll, though, ideally a lot of men would like that. But you do have to make an effort that you care about what you look like.
The FACT is that 99% of all men have to be PHYSICALLY attracted to you before anything else can happen. A lot of women dont like hearing that or reading that but it's the truth. So once you can understand that then you need to make an effort to look good. Any woman can go up 1 or 2 points if they really try. And how much is a "little overweight". If it's only 5-15 pounds then it shouldn't be a problem, espeically if ur healthy.
There are other factors to consider. I've coached business women who intimidated men because they felt they had to prove they were a man's equal. But in doing so they scared him off. Men don't want to date other men, they want to date a feminine woman that knows how to make him feel like a man. There's a lot more but that's the gist of it. It could be your looks, the vibe you're projecting, or maybe you need to get out more. Hard to say without really knowing more.
Rod
2006-09-18 16:15:39 · answer #3 · answered by thedatepro 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi girl, don't give up! It's fabulous to be curvy - I wish I have more of that and trust me, I am not exactly thin either. So you do have it better than me :)
If the men that you meet all want skinny girls with "no personalities, looks or even a career", it's their problem, not yours.
Remember, you are a fantastic catch and the reason why men are not after you either because of your weight or because they are intimidated (cos you are your own boss after all) is because they do not know better. And if that's the case, you will do well not to be with these guys too!
Just continue living your life and expanding your social circle with friends. Don't go to a party hoping to find your soul-mate. More often than not, the more you try to find, the more elusive they seem to be. Just try to be happy living your life on your own and I'm sure Prince Charming will come knocking on your doorstep someday :)
2006-09-18 16:13:01 · answer #4 · answered by syrope 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Personality trumps a woman's figure any day. The problem is that you are using a dating service where men are tapping into their VISUAL circuitry. Online dating service users are notoriously picky, so my advice to you is to chuck the online stuff and go out. Join a class or a club, join a gym, or go anywhere that will have you interacting with men on a regular basis. An online profile does very little to show the true you. Good luck.
2006-09-18 16:13:02 · answer #5 · answered by dante_cubit_3000 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men want barbie types because they exist and men are more visual. Either lose the weight or lose to wait. Life is what u make it. you owe it to yourself to meet more mature men. have fun with life.
2006-09-18 16:20:58 · answer #6 · answered by Necat T 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl let's go out!!! For real you are going to the wrong places because I see men getting alll kinds of shaped women. Just be more confident in your looks.
2006-09-18 16:12:22 · answer #7 · answered by Lady G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey all those men are bimbos type..why need them. Go look for the mature one whom knows how to appreaciate what a real woman is! Woman are not just for sex, they are for so many things!
2006-09-18 16:11:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
To me personally, i find women who is well groom, clean from head to toe and have a nice smell trully attractive. Its not the end of the world, im sure a nice guy just for you will find his way to you. Just patiently wait.
2006-09-18 16:16:27 · answer #9 · answered by Rene H 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A woman's smile is the most dangerous weapon known to man - IF it's sincere.
2006-09-18 16:13:47 · answer #10 · answered by dryheatdave 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋