Please help, I need advice on what to do…?

Question

I don't know what to do... I don't even know where to ask this question...

My dad has always been emotionally/verbal abusive and sometimes physical. My mom is in denial. I'm 20 yrs old, going to college. I live at home; in about a year I will leave. I have 2 younger siblings. I’m afraid that my dad will destroy them mentally.

I don’t like what it has done to me…I’m a bit suicidal and I cut myself at times, this summer I stopped eating and didn’t sleep for days, on and off for weeks. I’ve suffered from panic attacks. My mom doesn’t know any of this… nor does she want to see. My family has always leaned on me.

I don’t know what I should do. If I try to turn in my dad, how should I go about it…? If I do that… my mom would disown me… But I’m afraid for my siblings. I won’t be there in a year and right now, I can’t help them because I’m slipping in depression... They could be so much happier; they don’t have to live in fear…

Answer 1

You should get help and go to an outreach clinic. Tonight or tomorrow. DO IT! Please. 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

Answer 2

gees. remember that anything you say to them would be much much less terrible than if you hurt yourself. If you were to hurt yourself you would be the biggest victim. Please, you're only 20...I'm 50 and I've seen some really really rough times...times that I thought I would never see the other side of...Tell people how you feel, let them help you. You will get through this...one step at a time.


Like I said, I'm 50 and the last 30 years seems like a dream...it goes by so fast. I don't know the issues between you and your father, but I do know that you can find a life of your own...people are more resilient that you would think, as long as your father isn't abusing your siblings, they will get through this...my own dad was a mean old fart, but the last 15 years he's just become an old man and I understand him more...he really wasn't a mean guy, just proud. good luck, stay strong

Answer 3

Hi your probably get info overload at the moment with everyone tell what to should do, -

Firstly
I'm no expert,
secondly,
But from other experiences is there anywhere you could go for a couple days, just to allow yourself something to think, ? perhaps a college councilor could suggest location.

this is to let you relax and consider your options, before you made a very big decision . Its easier to decide something if you had get a rest first. and chaces are you will make a better make a better decision

Please do talk to some of these people, be it an organization, or advice centre, or college consilor, willing to offer help, on these answers

Also the way you can help your young sisters is for you to kept going, and I know you can, your doing a super human thing, in situation that's not your fault,

Your not alone in this, I will add more later this another organisation will be able to help http://www.ndvh.org,

All these people who answered, will be thinking about you today

C.C.
Add 13:25

Answer 4

you need to start getting therapy from an organization for help for yourself suicidal, and anxiety , depression, you qualify as a student for aid , mental health and mental retardation is a start, a social worker can get you started then , report the abuse about your brothers and sister, you are the only chance they have, what would you do if one of them ends up killing themself one day? you cant save them but you can help, maybe if you make it clear to your mom that you really need psychiatric help and you cant handle things any longer dont try to be the family hero , then you are only sweeping it under the carpet also and he will only continue and get worse.lets see......again you need to contact a social worker in your area and explain things to them, your father in return can recieve help if he admits if not then there is no reason the rest of his childrens lives should suffer, is he an alcoholic? please pray and dont be afraid to take action every thing will be ok , you will also be much happier in time with therapy and medication, i went through years of verbal and some physical abuse myself , my mother has not really changed but just gotten old, but i am growing everyday, with god medication, and some therapy, bless you and hang in there, [e-mail] hollar at me if you want to talk.

Answer 5

If you're the oldest, I'm afraid it's up to you to do something, and that means that at the age of 20 you need to get it together, leave that home, and get ahold of Child Protection services regarding your siblings. I had to do this, and my brother ended up living with me. It wasn't easy, but he never would have forgiven me if I had just left him there to suffer after I left home.

Answer 6

Look in the phone book for the nearest women's shelter or abuse clinic. Call them or go talk to them in person. It is confidential and they can tell you with greater accuracy what options you have open. That's your best course of action. Good luck to you!

Answer 7

except for the sibbling part (im an only child) I thought I wrote this myself. If it's to the point you're suicidal and you're cutting yourself you need help that no one on this forum is able to give. If you need some one to "talk to" PLEASE PLEASE PLEEEEEEEESE email me anytime. I do care and I do want to help.

Answer 8

I think you should just pray, even if you don't believe in God, when you call on him he'll help you with all of your problems.

Good Luck with your problems. God Bless!