This is REALLY long, but I would really really, greatly appreciate an honest answer, thanks!?

Question

This girl and me were really close, we would stay up till 12 in the mornin talkin sometime, now that mite not be alot, but it is for her, she is homeschooled, I go to public school. Well I asked her to the movies, and she said Idk maybe , and REALLy backed off, she seemed nervous around me, I thought she just didnt wanna hurt my feelings, but she told her friends, she just wants to see if I can stick with her. Well we got further and further apart, until I couldnt stand it anymore and I emailed her, spilled my guts, and asked her to be brutally honest on how she fealt about me, heres what she said

well first of all, I don't hate you. second, I haven't been avoiding you either becuase its not been just swimming that I've been busy with its been life.I also haven't been beating around the bush because you never asked me if I did or not. But I haven't ever thought of being more than friends with you because we've always been good friends and I think thats how things should stay.I just don't want to ruin a friendship.hope you've had a good day, and i will talk to you later

Now, When I read that two things come to mind. One, that she is just trying to be nice. But on the other hand, she is just scared, because she has never had a bf b4, and weve been friends since age 7.

But now she seems more comfortable around me, like now she talks more, and seems more comfortable, but then she'll seem like she wants me, I can tell by the way she looks, and the way she acts, she just seems really sad, and down,

Oh yeah, and she told her mom , that she is just really really scared, and that she does like me, but she told her friends she just dont want to hurt my feelings, now her and her mom are really close, but so are her and her friends, Do you think she likes me, or is just letting me down easy?

And I am respecting her wishes, I emailed her and told her that I respect her decision, and we havent talked about it since.

But I really really do care for her, I wake up and she's the first thing I think about, I go to sleep and Fall asleep thinking about her. I mean I know I'm only 15, but I really do love her, and would do anything in this world to be with her. I've tried moving on, I've been trying to do that, but I just can't. Even though I am am guy, yes I have cried numerous time for her, and about her. I mean, I'm not ugly, I'm fit, and I'm not a big geek or anything, so what gives? I really do love her, what should I do?

Additional Details

26 minutes ago
And, yes, her mom likes me, she told me that she is encouraging her daughter to date me, she also said that it was really hard for her daughter to sent that email, but in the mean time, she is really flirty with this other guy.

Additional Details

3 hours ago
But it's weird, like sometimes she'll seem sad, cuz she wants to be with me, then shell go and be REALLy happy and flirty with this other guy, then shell come up and talk to me, like she misses me, and then shell go flirt with him, I'm just SO CONFUSED, please help.

3 hours ago
but i mean, the way she is around him, is the way she used to be around me, and its weird, cuz we dont talk nearly nearly as much as we used to, and its almost like shes sad, or missin that or sumthin, but then all over this other guy

Answer 1

You seem to be obsessed

Answer 2

Wow, you've got it bad. It seems like your girl is a bit torn. If she's known you so long, (since age 7, right?) she might be worried about ruining your friendship. She does seem scared and that's understandable because of your gut spewing. Plus this business with the other guy is to make you jealous and to screw with your head. She's a little immature to be doing that, but it also maybe a thing where she wants you to do the ending of whatever relationship you have by flirting with this guy.

I'm just curious, at age 15 how do you know you're in love with this girl? It sounds a bit like "Romeo and Juliet" to me, intensely love-dovey but it ends, shall we say badly? You both need to back off and get comfortable in your own skin. Only then can you begin to think of having a relationship with this girl.

Answer 3

For starters, you sound really young (ah, just noticed you are 15). So trust me, this is going to be the first girl of MANY. Secondly, you have a severe case of "tunnel vision". I realize you really like this girl and probably have a strong case of infatuation. The reality is, is that she is NOT attracted to you. If she met some really HOT guy that she developed strong feellings for she would hook up with him in a second!

When you "spilled your guts" this only made thing worse because now you were putting her in an awkward position. She probably saw you as a really good friend and once she knew that you liked her she started pulling away. She also has feelings for someone else, feelings that she doesn't feel toward you. You're also confusing infatuation with "love" because to develop real love with another human being it has to be mutual, and in this case it's not.

It's OK to cry my man, I've done it many times at your age, but the fact is you have a long life ahead of you. I remember my first crush when I was 10, then I had a HUGE crush on this girl named Mary when I was 15. She said I was "nice and sweet" and that "any girl would be lucky to be with me" which confused the sheeet outta me because she only saw me as a "friend".

I know this is hard, but the best thing you can do for now, if you really care about her, is to give her HER space. Pull away also. Don't talk to her as much as you used to. You already told her how you felt and the fact that she started her response with "i don't hate you" tells me you really started off your email to her wrong.

If I were you I would send her an email like this:

"Hey there,

I just realized something. Even though I have feelings for you I did it in a way that put a lot of pressure on you. I wasn't thinking. For that I'm sorry. I know you don't hate me, I was in a really funky mood I've really got to stop drinking those energy drinks. I started thinking about all the good times we had as friends and would like it to go back the way it was.

Yeah, yeah, I know it may seem "weird" after that last email I sent you. But I really do see you as a good friend and want you to be happy. So if it's with someone else then so be it. Fate will decide. I know ur busy. So am I. I'll talk to you later."

And don't talk to her for like a week. It will be really hard. Trust me I KNOW. But the reality is that you're going to date other girls and she's going to date other guys, through college and beyond. So it's time to grow up some and handle this in a mature way and let her know you can handle being her friend. If it's meant to be then she'll ultimately fall for you.

While ur working on being her friend again you really should learn how to build attraction. Start working on your game! Nothing cures tunnel vision faster than talking to, flirting, and dating other girls. So let's get going!

Rod

Answer 4

She says she wants to be friends...... so be her friend, Respect her wishes and don't push her to make a decision. Try patience. She is young (like yourself) and things may be moving way too fast for her. If she's home schooled I'm assuming she may not have a lot of contact with other boys. If the two of you are meant to be together, you will. If not, then you won't. Fate can sometimes cause pain. It's called life experiences.

Answer 5

Well, you ask her and she answered. Yes, she's being nice and no she doesn't like you like that. It can be that she doesn't like you like that or that she feels she isn't ready for a romantic relationship with anyone.

You have two choices (1) you can accept what whe is willing to give or (2) you can terminate the relationship. You only have control over your feelings and your actions. It's a tough place to be. and yes she's definately spent time thinking about THAT, and she's either not interested in you that way or not intereested in that at all.

Answer 6

First of all **** you for making me read so much and secondly try your best to move on. I have been in your position before when i was 16. I really liked this girl but she only wanted to be friends wit me. It was really difficult for me to forget about her and just like you said, i als cried sometimes but trust me it took me so long to forget about her and i feel really good that i am not ruining my life for a girl who doesnt care about me in a romantic way. So dude move on date other girls. She isnt the only girl in the world you know and youre still 15. Once you grow up you will realize how stupid you were to fall for a girl and not being able to forget about her.

Answer 7

sounds LIKE U ARE HEAD OVER HEELS FOR HER why don"t you just keep on being good friends with her and see what happens. Who knows a true love between u 2 might blossom. u can not make someone love u so be prepared to just be friends. There is a lot of lonely people in the world just looking for someone to be friends with, count yourself lucky. u are young be patient.

Answer 8

hunny, I read it all and I'm sorry. Girl code says, she is just not feeling you.
She cares about you but she isn't intrested/ready for you.
I'd stick around maintain a friendship but move on there are lots of fish in the sea and maybe once your not romantically involved with her she will relize what she could have had.
Give her space and time and keep on moving.
Good luck.

Answer 9

She just want to be friends and she's not sure what to do, perhaps she's afraid of rejection. You just need to make her feel more comfortable around you, make her feel like she can trust you and no push her. Give her space. If you really like her, keep asking her out. Don't take the rejection too seriously, cause she's just nervous. At least she didn't say no, i don't like you, go away. =)

Answer 10

I think she just wants to be friends. You think so too but you are trying to find a way to believe something else. Let her go, concentrate on yourself, and don't miss a special person while obsessing over a dead end.

Answer 11

It sounds choose to me that she is enjoying “difficult to get” you recognize little techniques adult adult males and the on the different bring about step with risk she does not choose to break a protracted super friendship which you and her share. To be trustworthy with you i think of your to youthful to have that intense of a bond and feeling for somebody. yet i replaced into as quickly as youthful besides ~smile~ so i know the way it is, i will in trouble-free terms say that now. in step with risk you may sat her down and communicate tell her the form you experience yet make for useful you adult adult males don’t enable it “ harm” your friendship. or you be standoffish, back a away for a on the same time as... if she is conscious the form you experience then enable it rather is that enable her make the circulate, i realize it rather is going to likely be difficult yet whilst her heart is there for you have faith me she would manage to come lower back around. particularly in case you supply her somewhat area, attempt to maintain your self distance. she would manage to come lower back around whilst the time is robust. yet your nevertheless youthful have exciting you have all the time to grant your heart to somebody, if it replaced into meant to be for you 2 the time will come. “buddies make greater powerful fanatics” each now and then it takes time for buddies to determine that out. i'm hoping that enables!