I miss them so badly, I call them all the time and I don't want to be annoying. I keep thinking they are going to call me and say they miss me but maybe they just haven't had time ? Anyone else have trouble adjusting to their children moving out? I still have my youngest (17) at home with me but she has spent alot of time at her sisters' house as I am sure she is really missing their company. How to let them know I love them without being annoying?
2006-09-18 14:45:42 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Shelly, I have had two to move out too, and my 17 year old is home.
I have learned through trial and error, to make time for myself and let them know that I am there should they want or need me.
We have set up a day. Tuesdays,, that is my day.. And whatever happens, that is my day.. the other 6 belong to them.
We have a deal that I don't call them every day, but if I miss them and can't handle it at certain times, not to hesitate.
It's not that they don't have the time to call, they are just busy living their lives, and unfortunately that is the truth. Be happy that they are okay, healthy, happy. You have done your part.. I promise you, when you quit calling so much, you "will" hear that phone ring from time to time with, " I miss you mom"... not only that, they will then start finding excuses to call "you". It will happen, just give it time. They are just trying to be independent. Be proud that you have allowed them to grow up and be that.
You will be okay. Don't let them worry that mom can't handle it.. It will make them feel guilty and you don't want that.
And I would find something that I like doing and do it more often. If you are busy then it will be easier.. Enjoy life.. it is wonderful.. You are wonderful and you need to see that... Take care and have a great day.
2006-09-18 16:21:53 · answer #1 · answered by texas.okie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey Shelly, you want to let them know you love them without being annoying? Send them a Hallmark card in the mail. nothing says I love you better than Hallmark. or is it Hallmart? Anyways you get the idea.
Then check this out Shelly! Start to get to know Shelly! Go to a movie that Shelly likes. Go have dinner that Shelly likes. Treat Shelly like a special mom who has just done a wonderful job at raising her children and now begin to enjoy yourself now that they are off on their own, flying and beginning to live the life. Go to bingo. How about getting into some interesting classes in your local community college? Do some volunteer work for those less fortunate ones who don't have loved ones to visit them in a convalescent home or volunteer work at a hospital. Most important, get to know Shelly and let the mom rest. Ya know. :)
2006-09-18 21:53:04 · answer #2 · answered by beachgirl90 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have three kids who left the nest some years ago. I have finally realized that kids do not sit around worrying about what Mom is doing. My kids.....2 daughters and a son are all married and all live in 3 different states. My two daughters each have a daughter and continuing their educations. That is why we have kids......to perpetuate the species and do exactly what we did to our parents. For me, I am happy that they are happy, busy and have al ife. They all turned out well and now I can do as I please and don't sit around being a victim. It is up to you how to handle it because they are not worrying about your problem.
2006-09-18 21:52:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I (being only 14 yrs old) dont have kids yet but I know i will have the same problems you should try getting a new pet if u dont have one or spend more time with your friends or husband/boyfriend
2006-09-18 21:50:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My mom had the same problem when I moved out- instead of calling every 10 minutes ( which my dad does and is VERY annoying haha)... Send them random cards throughout the week - everybody loves getting mail - Im sure they'll enjoy it - and it'll keep you out busy scooping at the funniest/cuttest/and most sentimental cards!
2006-09-18 21:48:10 · answer #5 · answered by bridgey 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it has to be tough i cant imagine mine leaving he is 13.. they do leave at one point so wish them well but let them know that the door is always open should they need you.. but try very hard to get a routine like dinner Wednesday night kinda thing going. if you start a new tradition then things wont be so hard for you.
2006-09-18 21:50:13 · answer #6 · answered by bluedanube69 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stop calling them all the time, let them come to you when they can. in the mean time, you can get a couple pets, and pick up a few hobbies to keep you busy.
2006-09-18 21:49:05 · answer #7 · answered by superboredom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a hobby or start doing crafts . It is time for you now , the girls will be fine or I promise if they need something they will call you !
2006-09-18 22:05:41 · answer #8 · answered by Geedebb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they know you love them so dont worry about that. i would recommend getting some pets, its a good feeling to be needed and to take care of something. adopt some pets who need the love.
2006-09-18 21:50:35 · answer #9 · answered by haybeaver 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You mean to tell me that you haven;t thrown a party yet....lets be gettin on the ball. Hurray the daughters are out...it's party time!
2006-09-18 21:47:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋